Is it normal to feel nervous speaking to someone on a dating app?

[Anonymous]

I have been speaking to a guy I met off a dating app the past few days. We’ve only texted and voice noted each other here and there and we’re still getting to know each other.

Why is it that I feel very nervous every time I reply to him or voice note him? I’m worried about how he will perceive me.

I’m usually a confident person. I don’t think I like him I don’t know him yet.

[RealMarek]

It’s normal to feel a bit of nervousness when first getting to know someone like this when 1) you are viewing this person as a potential boyfriend and 2) you are not face to face. There is a lot of uncertainty and you cannot see his body language to get feedback of how he is viewing you. Because of this uncertainty it is important to not get too wrapped up emotionally in this connection. I don’t think you have done that, but I recommend making sure you don’t.

You need to meet this guy first. It could be difficult to have a casual in-person meeting in a safe place if he lives in a different country, but I think the first meeting should be casual and brief so you can see his body language and pick up on subconscious aspects that might influence compatibility, like scent, before getting emotionally bonded or involved with him.

[Asker]

Thank you. That makes a lot of sense.

[Pleebody21]

You may like him more than you think and afraid to "blow it" If you haven't met him or gone out cut the crush thing and wait until you have real interaction. A phone is a piece of plastic and wires. Person to person is where you read body language and have a "6th" sense who'll tell you!

[SphynxUK]

It’s normal to be nervous, but I’m wondering why you are continuing to speak if you don’t think you like him?

[Asker]

Oh I meant I’m interested definitely but I don’t think I like him because I hardly know anything about him yet nor have we met!

[SphynxUK]

Oh! Well, when I’m interested I just worry they don’t like me, and what to say that isn’t boring lol. I am quiet, but confident, but I still get tongue tied if I like them 🙄

[Asker]

That’s exactly how I feel!

[weysally]

never been on an app, but no matter the first time I think every one gets nervous,

[AmeerX]

I have this initial shyness as well. But the real reason might be that I have this problem where I somehow can predict how long a certain person is with me. I feel abandoned 😅 but I think I have overcome that issue lately

[Asker]

Aw I’m sorry to hear that

[AmeerX]

Oh it's alright. Men need to walk the walk. No point hating someone if they are in your life temporarily.
This world is not permanent. We might be here today but we don't really know what the future holds. Like, be happy if someone gave us good memories. Don't be sad if they are no longer with us.

I guess I learned this the hard way after my serious heartbreak 💔. You know you might laugh but I have the gift from God where I usually know a person's intentions the moment they enter the same room in a building. I try not to show it but I don't know I guess people have a quota of time reserved for each other. Make good of it or make it miserable choice is mutual

[Asker]

Do you wanna talk? I have also been through similar experiences

[AmeerX]

With you? About what?

[Asker]

About life

[AmeerX]

Sure thing

[AmeerX]

You can message me. I can't message you since you are not following me

[Part2603]

I can't imagine feeling like that again. This guy have anything interesting going on that you would feel that way?

[Asker]

Yeah…he ticks most of the boxes for me and I’m quite picky

[Part2603]

Lol, can you be more specific?

[Asker]

He’s cute, tall, educated, and speaks to me like a man with respect

[Asker]

Also his age is good

[boggboss]

Normal if your not a confident person which u clearly are not

[Asker]

I’m a confident person that’s why I’m confused

[Asker]

I just care about how HE perceives me

[boggboss]

U are able to be confidant and by shy when it comes to relationships or being vulnerable with the other sex

[Asker]

Ahhhh I see

[Swede16]

I don't know exactly how to put this but if you are still just getting to know him so much so that you aren't even sure if you like him, that is not a great thing. Butterflies over a cute guy is perfectly normal but the way you worded it... "I’m worried about how he will perceive me." is a little uneasing.

Just remember you existed before him and no matter his perception, you will continue to exist after him. Don't make the mistake of putting too much stalk in someone else's opinion of you that you start to twist yourself into what you think he would want. It never works and will likely lead you to self-confidence, accountability, and co-dependency issues more and more down the road.

In laments terms... Don't focus too much worrying about what the tip of your nose looks like... because one day when realize it never really mattered, you are gonna look up and now you're cross-eyed. 😂 lol

[Asker]

Thank you!! I’ll keep telling myself this

[boggboss]

Pretty solid advice

[Swede16]

@boggboss Thank you lol. Ancient Swedish Viking Prophecy. Very renowned secret. Don't tell anyone. 😂

[boggboss]

My lips are sealed 😅

[JPresidente]

There are still too many unknowns. It’s easier to be confident around those you are familiar with and can talk and act a certain way. The unfamiliar causes hesitation and doubt until a comfort level is achieved.

[Dav1dTh0ma3]

I don't use dating apps mainly because they are scams but yes, it's normal to feel that way before meeting someone like that. You're always going to feel nervous meeting new people etc..

[Hallix26]

It's normal to be nervous in general I'd say. And going for it is never entirely easy whether online or IRL but the plunge is necessary to find love.

[noohair]

My experience is that texting and social media has ruined dating and courtship.

[EaterPeter]

Yes.

[EaterPeter]

Thanks for like!

[Asker]

You’re welcome

[Noah-z]

Its not.

[Preeti161101]

Possible