Men, if every attempt to meet, date, or sleep with women fails?

[msc545]

Why in hell do most of you persist and keep right on failing? All you get from this is less money, wasted time, and depression and damaged self-esteem. Why bother?

Updates

+1 y

Patronize prostitutes instead. They are nicer, far more accepting, always provide sex, appreciate repeat business, and cost a lot less than dating.

[lightbulb27]

yea, nice job avoiding the matters of the heart and the deeper emotional issues that are causing problems. Just take drugs instead, it's cheaper and easier.

I know that feeling.

There's reasons... I don't really need to list them...

I recall being surprised hearing a therapist say they had a therapist. there's reasons why... we cannot see ourselves so well [Johari Window?] and will avoid dealing with our deeper issues in favor of what is easy. Avoidance!

If Edison (and others) gave up on the lightbulb... we could still be living in the dark too...

Stress and pain are communicators and educators. They kill us or make us stronger as we grow. We don't like them, but we have to learn (the emotional growth), or we keep repeating our patterns programmed in development years.

Is it possible there's a whole realm of emotion you are not educated or believing in, or is it just avoiding the pains of life as they are too great?

I'd suggest seeking therapy, except a lot of it is really not helpful. It can be at times when you are ready and the therapist is highly competent. Finding a good therapist is difficult... I went through 5 before one started to "crack the nut"...

p. s. nothing is perfect... solve one set of problems, get some new ones. That's life...

I think the answer is... God! That is, we resonate back to which we came from... love. Although our view of love can be twisted from early years. We are seeking some sense of connection and completion before we exit. We have time, for which to live and experience a short time.

We are not made to be alone...

[Daniela1982]

Even God said that of Adam.
Genesis 2:18
New International Version
18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
So he created Eve out of one of Adam's ribs.

[lightbulb27]

@Daniela1982 yes, can learn a lot about how things work and what's broken from chapter 2 and 3. when you are scribbling important stuff onto rocks, tend to use few words. "rib" = tsela in hebrew... has deeper meaning.

[msc545]

@Daniela1982 It is also not good for men to be abused, and trying to date produces that result.

[msc545]

Men do not get to "the matters of the heart and the deeper emotional issues" with women who won't even speak to them or who ghost them after one date.

[lightbulb27]

They can get to matters if their own hearts. ‘Stone sharpens stone’.

[msc545]

That is not an answer to the question.

[Daniela1982]

With who?

[OfMiceandMen]

@Daniela1982 He gave up rib for her?🤔😂

[lightbulb27]

It's give and take, hard on both sides.
I answered your question, what is not understood? those whom wrote the bible knew it so well, they wrote stories on this Genesis 2 and 3, scribbled onto rocks. Some knowledge has been lost in time it appears...

My opinion is if ever attempt to sleep with women fails... good job women! Keep them suffering until you get a ring. Unfortunately it's not that simple and the women use other techniques to get what they want... the man's heart! That's what I think Genesis is talking about..."the rib"... through the protective covering of the "heart" of man.
Where are you emotionally, it doesn't seem so good...

[KrakenAttackin]

Because we are programmed to keep banging our heads up against the female wall, and this is tough programming to counter. I will say men are FINALLY beginning to understand the female games.

When I was growing up woken were always portrayed as kind, demure, chaste, righteous, and virtuous. When a man finally begins to realize that women are FAR from virtuous and chaste, it's very confusing to men. Thankfully the Internet came along and men can share their experiences and educate other men about the true nature of modern women.

[MissusFluffyPants]

Can I just add that as a woman it’s pretty crappy out there for us too? I’m actually pretty easy going and I still get ghosted and bread crumbed by men who just want an ego boost, a nude picture with no commitment or emotional input from them or they’re only looking for “a bit of fun”.

I don’t want fancy dates or gifts, I just want someone emotionally mature, that I can talk to and have fun with. Obviously I need to be attracted to them, but I’m not into buff, perfect men, I don’t have unrealistic expectations.

Personally I blame online dating, people have too much choice they constantly think there’s someone “better” they can find and think too much of themselves. People can forget it’s an actual human being on the other side of that line of text.

[Sweetsurprize]

I'm not a man/guy but I wouldn't want someone who had been on the cock carousel as they say.

I would also think that a lot of men are traditional and they want to have a wife and family they'd be proud to show off to their original family.

[Anonymous]

I think the problem is too many guys expend too much energy on the wrong women. And then when they come across a worthwhile woman they're exhausted and understandably do not want to try again.

Most women today are simply not worth dating. Which is fine because most of them would make pretty bad partners even if they did agree to date you.

I think if more men were much more selective a lot of this "gender war" problem would cure itself. Don't entertain a woman just because she makes goo goo eyes at you. Make her put forth some energy. If she doesn't want to do that then leave her for the streets. I know this comment makes some women mad and that's fine. But I'm not giving guys a pass either. You're a f***ing man. Know that! Don't back down from that. grab that and embody that! A man doesn't tolerate a woman's games. A man is ALWAYS OK being by himself. And a man is always growing and trying to make himself better. Not for a woman! For the fact that he's a man and that's what MEN do. MEN built civilization. Continue to be part of that legacy.

[EricSummer]

Everybody should be able to meet women and also to date women. Now to actually make it work and start a sexual relationship can be a challenge I grant you that. For most men it works out eventually. Actually, at your age it is getting easier.

The cruelest is at age 14 for those of us who already feel a burning desire but still look like children. To those only I would advise taking it slowly and let time play in their favor until they are about 16. They should avoid getting freaked out or ven damaged by rejection too early. It will never again be that bad.

[DextroShade]

Even the top-tier master pickup artists only have a success rate of 10% when approaching women. It's just a numbers game, all you have to do is make sure you don't get finesse. If you can tell the date isn't going well or she's just on phone the whole time the check should be split, it doesn't matter how she feels about it because you won't be seeing her again.

[Daniela1982]

But if you take someone out on a date in order to get her into bed, then it is the guy who makes her a prostitute - trading sex for a dinner and night out.

[msc545]

No, she was a prostitute to start with. She makes that trade. He just offers.

[Daniela1982]

What I mean is that you say to get a prostitute instead of a girl to date. Or, you could get an imaginary lover.
https://youtu.be/YMY92LsjNBE?si=5pNuyZshycCRdOB2

[msc545]

I think some guys actually do this...

[exitseven]

Humanity is sometimes cruel. Your whole being is designed to reproduce and some guys just lack whatever intangible thing that nature dictates that enables guys to find mates. It just sucks.

[Jmmmfi4]

I don't try... couldn't even remember the last time I did.

[Anonymous]

I don't but then I'm asexual, had enough of that for this life time and ready for the seperation of the genders

[Nikki1989]

It is that self-defeatist attitude that keeps so many men single and bitter.

[msc545]

No, it is having the common sense to move away from punishment and failure. Discretion is the better part of valor.

[msc545]

I rrealize as a woman you have a vested interest in getting men to try and fail. Not all of us are willing to do that, sorry.

[Jamie05rhs]

Less money? I'm not spending any money. Lol

[LimitedBenefits101]

Some men are just idiots.

[Danael31]

Instinct and social construction bro