How to kindly reject him?

[kc2043]

Reconnected with a friend guy , but I can't date him due to beliefs, morals, and standards.. I'm open to friendship, but can't date him... he's wanting more from me and I can't date him.

How to kindly decline his romance offer?

Updates

+1 y

Why are people saying that o said this guy will argue? Not once did I say he would.. I don't know how he will respond and I haven't talked to this guy yet. I don't want to drag it on giving him false hope. Idc how he responds.. will it hurt me because our friendship will be gone yeah , yeah.. but the truth of the matter it's a controversial topic.. not for tbe faint of heart.

[kylee2437]

Be upfront and honest. While you don’t want a relationship with him, you do also need to accept the possibility of him not wanting to be friends too.

[kc2043]

I've accepted that

[kylee2437]

Are you sure about that? I feel like if that was the case, you would have no problems telling him

[kc2043]

Talking about losing our friendship poor guy went through a divorce too not because of me in general...

[kylee2437]

Not your problem to worry about

[kc2043]

Didn't say it was just letting it be known that's my stance..

[loveslongnails]

You simply repeat what you told us - that your personal beliefs, morals and standards are too different from his and you couldn't abide by them in a relationship. You're being honest and it's not mean. He'll probably want to get into a big discussion about it, rather than just say "okay", so be prepared for that.

[kc2043]

He will mostly get in an argument due to rejection, but I don't want to waste his time

[loveslongnails]

It takes two to argue. You just say "I'm not going to debate your beliefs and morals with you... just accept that I'm not interested in a romance. We can be friends (though I don't know why you would want to be if you reject his whole belief system?), but I don't want anything more".

If he persists, excuse yourself and say good bye. It's not that difficult.

[kc2043]

He's inclined on dating me it's sad

[loveslongnails]

It's not your problem, so why worry about it? If you've been kind and honest, that's the best thing. He'll learn to deal with rejection, or he won't. Not your problem.

[kylee2437]

@kc2043 is the friendship really worth it if he’s going to argue about how you feel?

[kc2043]

I don't know how he's gonna respond yet...@kylee2437 .. been knowing him over years

[loveslongnails]

Does his response really matter? Unless he loses his shit altogether, threatens you, or starts talking crazy, like "I'll kill myself if you don't go out with me", why does his response actually matter to you? If he says, "okay, but I can't just be friends so I'll go", do you really care?

[kylee2437]

@kc2043 but you have in your head that he’s going to argue. Of course he’s going to want an explanation but hey if you can think of a way to best explain how you are feeling without being mean, there’s nothing to argue about.

[kc2043]

Who said anything about caring? I haven't told this guy anything yet because I'm trying to find the best words... idc what he does with the information after I tell him

[kc2043]

I bever said this guy will argue not once. Did I mention that most of you did. I said I don't know how he will respond - I haven't talked to him yet because I've been trying to approach this the best way.

[kc2043]

It's a pretty controversial matter, but it matters

[kylee2437]

Honey if no one can really help you here, there’s no point asking the question lol everyone has pretty much said what you should do

[kc2043]

Yeah I hear what everyone said and that's great.. I'll take it from there now

[loveslongnails]

The consensus among those replying is that he won't go down without a fight, or at the very least want an explanation. When you said this: " He's inclined on dating me... it's sad", I inferred that it made YOU sad. I now understand you probably mean "the situation is sad", and it's sad for him.

Anyway, I've given what I think is a kind way, and others have too, so please let us know what happens!

[kc2043]

I told him and he said ok but backed off

[loveslongnails]

Fascinating. I truly expected a rebuttal.

[In_Trance]

So you say something like no thank you I'm not interested

[sheikalana]

Be straight forward say why you're not interested in turning it into a romantic relationship but would like to remain friends. Be ready for him to reject your friendship tho.

[overthinkergirl]

just be direct and told him everything as you did here:)

[Billlewis]

Just tell him.

[slatyb]

Thanks but I don't think it would work.

[Pterodon]

Tell him what you told us

[kc2043]

I did he can't take no for an answer

[Pterodon]

He’s gonna have to. Then you might have to tell him if he insists you won’t talk to him anymore