Has he changed his mind on his masters because of me?

[Anonymous]

I was seeing this guy casually during our final year of undergrad degree. We’re both now having a year off and moved back home and called it off (we live very far from each other). We got back in contact a few months ago and have met up a few times.

He said was gonna do his masters next year in a completely different city in a different part of the country (he loves to explore new places) and seemed really excited about it. I told him recently I was gonna go back to Liverpool for my masters and now suddenly he’s pretty set on doing the exact same thing, despite the other course being better suited.

Am i being conceited, or does this have anything to do with me? I’d hate for someone to base important life decisions on my choices🤣

[Avicenna]

It's definitely because he wants to be with you

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm that is kinda strange that he suddenly changed his plans to do the same master's course as you after being really set on something else. I wouldn't say you're being conceited for wondering if you had any influence on his decision. A few thoughts:

- It's possible he thought more about the pros/cons of both options and genuinely prefers the one near you now for other reasons like location, program etc.

- OR he may be hoping to reconnect with you for real during your master's years and doesn't want the long distance again if you're both in the same city.

- BUT changing up important life/career plans just to follow a love interest isn't usually the best idea.

I'd maybe gently bring it up with him - say you noticed the change and want to understand his thinking fully so you don't feel like he's basing a big decision solely on you. Reassure him his choices are his own. If he's still vague or defensive, that's a red flag he may not be thinking clearly. Proceed cautiously but communication is key here.