Should I be straightforward as a guy who is not particularly good looking, not particularly tall, not particularly muscular, not particularly rich?

[Anonymous]

I'm definitely not ugly, but I can't say I would notice myself if I were a girl, nobody can say I'm short, and people think I'm a bit taller than I am, but nobody can say "that tall guy". One can't say I'm not in a great shape, but nobody can say I'm bulked up either, because I go to the gym to be as fit as possible. I approach girls I don't know often (not random girls on the street, but at social events) because I like socializing with all people and I trust my social abilities. People respond well to me socially because I make myself heard. However, girls I approach randomly and ask out very soon tend to reject me, not instantly, but they are indecisive or cancel plans of dating last minute. Just for you to know, it's that type of cute, "good" girls.

I'm just wondering whether this is the right approach. When I have time to establish a connection with girls, I have great success and people think that I am (used to be) a womanizer because of that. But now my life's getting more and more busy and I can't meet as many girls as before. Also, I wanna be true to myself and make my intentions clear from the beginning.

[Oliverlogan263]

Yo bro, I feel you on that. Dating while average can be tough sometimes. But don't sell yourself short - you seem like a chill dude.

A few thoughts - it may help to chat girls up a bit before hitting them with the ask right away. Like you said, building some rapport works better. Flirt and get to know them for 10-15 minutes first.

Also nothing wrong with being upfront about wanting to take them out sometime, but don't phrase it as a super serious "date." Keep it light, like "We should grab coffee and continue our convo." Takes pressure off.

Confidence is key too man. Own who you are - focus on your awesome personality shining through. Don't think of yourself as average. And girls pick up on that vibe.

Last tip, try asking for numbers over right away asking out. Easier for them to agree to, and then you follow up with firm plans.

You got this bro! Just refine your approach a little. Keep being yourself and the right girl will see how dope you are.

[Anonymous]

Focus on your personality. That other stuff is not as important as you might think.