If a local girl/guy (stranger) asked you out on a date, how soon (days wise) would you feel comfortable going out with them?

Question

PLEASE READ!!! So initially he said “just let me know when because I get it, you barely know me” (mf ion know you at all). Then it changed to “Lets go tomorrow” as if i’d know him so much more well by then. Well I got to know him and we have a lot in common. Plus he's cute. But he's bald so I’m already making an exception because thats not really my type. Then we got into an argument the next day about something he strongly supports that I do not. He said he wanted to stop getting to know me, so I helped set the mf free and I had moved on.  
 
 His ass came back 3 hours later saying he thought things over and we could compromise. Convos going good or whatever. Then he goes “so when are we going on a date?” As if he didn't ask that 3 hours earlier. I told him I’d feel more comfortable within a week or two, basically this weekend or next weekend. He snapped and said “Look I’m looking for a wife! I won't be sitting around for a week or two getting to know you by phone first.” I said well you’re free to go. Like dafuq. I’m not about to chase this bald and beautiful ass mf cause again thats not even my main type. Either you stay or you go. Bye. Then he said “We need to go on a date by this Wednesday tops.” Mind you all of this is still within the first 48 hours of barely knowing him. Am I wrong for not wanting to go out with Mr. Pushy so soon? I asked a bunch of women in person if that was too soon and they said they also would have said within a week or two so they had time enough to get an outfit and makeover. I asked men in person and they said the girl should agree to go on a date the same day she was asked out (so practically go on a date by that night). Wtf lmao #FeelFreeToList

Yannae · Accepted Answer

That "PLEASE READ" who am I to decline such a sign
I read it. He sounds pushy man. He's looking for a wife and you already butted heads about strong beliefs going different directions. I don't know how important that belief is and how big of a role that plays in both your lives, but if that role is big, I wouldn't bother. And I just noticed now you call him Mr. Pushy LOL I was like "I've seen enough." IT HAS TO BE Wednesday. A couple of days or seven, what's the difference. Does he think a few days longer before a date is going to ruin possible marriage? I don't get his logic here.

If a stranger asks me out and I'm at least somewhat attracted to her, I'll give her a shot and ask what time works for the two of us. Depending on how well that first chat goes the date could go for a few hours or just a coffee date with little risk.

ChiTown33 · Accepted Answer

Maybe like 6 months. Keep in mind you asked how long before I'd feel comfortable. By nature dating is NOT a comfortable endeavor. Guys are generally relegated to doing whatever makes the woman they're dating or trying to date more comfortable. I've talked to women who after a couple months didn't feel comfortable enough to date. I've also talked to women that after exchanging 3 sentences, she asked ME out. There really is no pattern when it comes to women. Some women are very aggressive, some are very timid, and everything in between.

luvstoned4him · Accepted Answer

What the actual?

Nah, girl let that man go. You wantED to take it slow and get to know him and he snapped and was pushy? That's a whole AZZZ red flag and you dodged a bullet.

and of course I agree with you because I've had a local take my number and try to ask me out the next day. He was pushy as hell even though I told him that I would like to get to know him a bit more on phone. I'm glad I didn't rush it because I talked to a guy friend of mines about this guy and showed him the dude's picture and lo and behold the guy is in a whole azz relationship. Instant block and delete. I'm not about that life.

PRO TIP: Always share their pics with you male or female friends cause ya never know what you will find out. ;)

jennifer_bloom · Accepted Answer

I think 10 days is enough for a coffee but it would be at least 2 months before I will be comfortable eating pasta at their house. Sex is after marriage. Also it’s 2 months for a co worker with no red flags but 6 months for someone I have no mutual friends with.

Avicenna · Answer

When I was your age, it didn't take much time with a lot of the women I met. Sometimes it did, for various reasons. At the end of the day, you need to be comfortable, not only with the person, but also the process.

ohmyguy · Answer

In public nearly any where in north amarica and generaly in sure all around the world its pretty safe for al person up to what it is there doing around other people.

Ladies guys are aware that your safey is high priority as learned as brothers, fathers, uncles and as bfs of past present n future.

And yes maybe to a small sum of men have shown a inability to contain them selves n have and may activlely behave in a matter not condusive to the the goal, with is ultamatly a positive out come for both sexes.. He He ha lol a tiny pun there, any who

There is no real reason to have to too to much fear or anxiety about meeting and being in the company of a stanger.. in all most all settings it highly unlikely to produce any more drastic than a slightly awkward situation.

But more likely to be a pretty decend not so bad as i thought, no big deal.

If u feel being lured some where.. that because thats whats actually going down. But only only in a small sence.. see coarting or courtship is the process getting to know a person enough that you choose be with ever more often and gradually more intamate.. gradually means depending on your experience. . which had to be Good for both.

Having you crying angry miserable or kicking n screaming is not our go too.. in any shape or form only at. the end of our rope a last resort.

centuries we been working at perfecting going about this the vast majority of us will jump back wards through rings of fire into the lions cage, too what lenth we go for your comfort ease as men in general. Would have move all to mountains by now if we to busy organising the world society our selves to to a degree of sufistication so humanity can interact in civil dignified fashion its a actually remarkably wonderful thing... if you wanna know more do the date damn it and get some joy into you life..

there's a saying

It takes two to Tango

Twalli · Answer

My girlfriend and I didn't go out for almost a year. Mostly because neither of us wanted to get rejected, but still. 1-2 weeks is short enough, I'm looking for a wife too and started looking at 25. Considering that most marriages end in divorce, maybe wishing for a wife to be a lifetime commitment isn't really something I should aim for, but I am. I think you should live together before getting engaged. You will have bad days, and they will have bad days. Make sure both of you can handle the other's bad days before deciding to marry.

DryGermanGuy · Answer

From my perspective, I'll take it easy, go with the flow, wait for your suggestions or might make one myself. Depending on where we live/work, spontaneously meeting 30 minutes for a coffee is really no big deal.

His “Look I’m looking for a wife!" sounds ridiculous, to be honest. Is he planning to buy an engagement ring for your first date? What's with the rush?

Serkee · Answer

In most cases I'd be comfortable going on a date immediately. But as for your situation, that guy is raising all sorts of red flags. Getting angry and aggressive at the drop of a hat, changing his mind on stuff over and over again that quickly, insisting you do everything his way, he sounds like a ticking timebomb.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

Nah, you're not wrong at all.. If you didn't agree to a date already and just wanna get to know somebody a bit first is fine.. You wanna know if this guy is crazy or not. Although from his side, one could say that that's the purpose of going on a date.

Shark_61695 · Answer

Depends on what you're feeling. Sounds a bit pushy to me but I think a quick meeting is good after meeting anyone.

That way you can get it over with and make an informed decision on if you want to start dating. The first meeting isn't a real date unless you have known them in person for a while before.

You don't have to give a reason to say no and if he fights you on that then it raises a few red flags.

SherryBomb · Answer

Infinity. I don't date anymore, everyone is too shallow, self focused, and materialistic. I'm just trying to find my happiness alone.

Markymark92 · Answer

Well it really all depends how you feel about it, I’d personally say it’s too soon… even if a local woman wanted to date me like that I’d be like nah, I’d wanna talk a little more… feel them out and actually think about the whole situation instead of jumping the gun… sounds like he’s in some sort of mid life crisis and he don’t got much time left 😂

Kelley1 · Answer

If I am interested, the following day or even later that day is not too soon. If he is not my type, I am not going to go on a date. Regardless, I would not have put up with that.

delsworld · Answer

Just stick to your type religiously. If you are going to put up with that kind of behaviour at least let him be the epitome of your type at that point.

RavVid · Answer

I am either immediately comfortable going out with them or never will be.  The chances of a girl not being of immediate interest but becoming of interest are low. Not happened yet.

DJB72 · Answer

You're definitely not being unreasonable. If his response was aggressive in any form then that's a red flag. Insisting his girlfriend always lives with him is a red flag. Run, girl.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Could be 5 days, weeks, or just 5 minutes. I was sitting, talking on a coffee date with my now husband, literally minutes after meeting him.

Phoenix98 · Answer

I mean I'm comfortable going out on a date with someone without really knowing em or anything but that's just me. That first date is after all to get to know them.

exitseven · Answer

telling you ha wants a wife before you have the first date is really creepy, You could end up handcuffed in his basement

Anpu23 · Answer

Wow, what a mess. I am in a committed relationship so its not an issue for me. But it sounds like it's way too much to soon to me.

nawtee_me · Answer

So those guys basically want you to go on a blind date with someone you don’t know. Mr. Pushy needs to be pushed away. You might have to ask him for a divorce…. lol

GeminiDiamond · Answer

When he snapped, I'd be sorta be on guard. He assumed I was looking for a husband.

MicahRaine · Answer

It depends. Maybe a a week or so if we can do an unofficial date?

Ad_Quid_Orator · Answer

I'd first want to talk over the phone and after that, it would depend on how compatible I think we are.

Wiredone · Answer

You should wait until you feel comfortable being around him just to make sure he's not a serial killer. He seems a little pushy to me.

Extraterrestrial1999 · Answer

I probably would feel comfortable after a few days. I don't wanna wait too long to go out with them.

mandyfire98 · Answer

Red flags everywhere.

KelsoAlexander · Answer

If a chick asked me out im assuming she got a date and all that shit planed all i gotta know is when and where.

moneymagnet24 · Answer

Sad to see you're dealing with blad man.. Dude why you're lowering your standard?

LunarEclipse433 · Answer

A real date, a week. Doesn’t mean anything will happen

Abdulwahh · Answer

Depends if i like her then as soon as possible.

HH1488 · Answer

Why not now? I'm here, she's here, my wife is asleep. She's always asleep.

rapfan107 · Answer

After having a few conversations with them and see if i can trust them or not

WhitneySnow · Answer

I agree with you 100%

NathanDavis · Answer

three seconds...

RHK36 · Answer

He sounds crazy. Stop picking toxic dudes.

Jerre · Answer

I’d forget the guy. Sounds like an asshole!

FenixG45 · Answer

Yup. Report, Block and Delete are your Friends!

A_Nihilist · Answer

The next week or so if they passed the vibe check.

justabuddy · Answer

Probably best to take it slow.

If a local girl/guy (stranger) asked you out on a date, how soon (days wise) would you feel comfortable going out with them?

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