Should I stop dating this lady after realizing she's kind of a bully?

[Anonymous]

I've noticed her putting down and making fun of other women.

[DishLady]

If you’re not into that then yeah, stop.

[Asker]

I still like her despite it, it would turn me on if she bullied me.

[DishLady]

You to you, buddy. I don't know you or your list of kinks. It's falls under TMI.

[blueonblack22]

Funny I dated a “mean girl” a years ago. She was bitchy to everybody except me. She treated me like a king because she had feelings.

Then after 9 months of dating she completely ghosted me after a minor argument. Never heard from her again.

Anyway your girlfriend is being nice to you because at the exact moment she finds value in you. But there will come a day where she doesn’t have the immediate feelings like she has now. The value you provide her won’t be tangible as it once was for her.

When that day happens whether or not she treats you decently all comes down to general principle. And from what you are describing she doesn’t treat people well out of general principle because likely has no respect for people who don’t immediately benefit her.

So an oncoming train wreck is very likely unless she magically stays in love with you forever. But how often does that happen? If I were you I would put together an exit plan.

[Asker]

I do wanna stay with her for as long as I can, I feel kinda bad about it but, I still like her.

[blueonblack22]

As a rule of thumb a man is only valuable to a woman for whatever her can provide for her IN THE MOMENT. Right now you on her good side.

But you “feel bad” about the prospect of leaving her because men more instinctively care for women regardless of the woman can provide value to him or not. In general we are subconsciously more protective of women.

But mark my words. There is going to come a day when her interest level in you will be tested. Then she might end up treating you much more brutality then if the roles were reversed. Just a warning. Men are expendable.

[zagor]

Yeah; she probably badmouths you when you're not around. Or are.

[coxoabean]

Yes, it is never ok to bully others, so you should see her doing that as a red flag

[ShadesVow]

If you have to ask then it seems like you aren't a terribly moral person anyways so it doesn't matter. If you have a strong moral compass you wouldn't need advice regarding this

[Asker]

I mean, yeah, I'm not.

[ShadesVow]

Then what is the issue with her bullying others? If you actually had an issue with it you would have left immediately. So I'd wager this is just your attempt at finding a "valid reason" to end things for something you (or she) may not deem valid.

[Asker]

Actually, I don't really wanna end things.

[ShadesVow]

Well then what seems to be problem? End of the day it circles back to do you actually have a problem with what she is doing (doesn't seem like it as you are still with her) or is it something else but this is easier to focus on.

[Anonymous]

Yes you should.

[Asker]

Do you think it would turn out bad if I stayed with her long term?

[ImAlly]

Yes for sure. Nothing to think about.

[Asker]

I don't know if I can break up with her, I still like her.

[ImAlly]

You like a person that is mean to others? That is not anyone I would want to be around me. You must be desperate.

[Asker]

Not really, she's just hot.

[Anonymous]

Yes, you should.

[Anonymous]

Yep.

[Asker]

You think she would try to bully me?