Why do most women say guys are picky and/or beauty standardsthatswhat?

[Anonymous]

Updates

1 y

Accidently hit send without being able to finish editing the title. Anyway what I'm asking is being that most "average" women per day can find sexual partners pretty easily even compared to an attractive man, why do folks feel beauty standards for women are high? Or that men's physical requirements are too high? I've seen the opposite. Ladies educate me.

[DishLady]

1. Guys tend to be very visual in terms of what attracts them, so that's partially why that set of comments exists.

2. Some guys are labeled as "picky" but based on what I know about "picky" types these are guys who aren't ready for a realistic relationship. Like some women, their standards are beyond any realistic expectations.

I've spoken with a lot of guys who ask me to match them with a friend, but what they expect is for me to basically parade all my female friends in front of them for them to choose, even though they have no serious intention of choosing. I never accept to do this bc it's embarrassing for the girl while also enabling a dysfunctional expectation on the guy's behalf that he is somehow perfect enough to be picky and choosy about meeting someone while every woman is simply "flawed" in some way. (In reality, nobody's perfect.)

[Asker]

So not who they'd be willing to sleep with which is most women but who they actually legitimately find attractive right? Is that what you mean in your first paragraph? Because even an "8" guy has less options then a "6" woman based on his phone call and text log and social media inboxes compared to hers.

[DishLady]

It depends on the guy... for some guys, the visual is more than just a sexual thing, for others it's "just sex" and there's no other standard bc they're not thinking about relationships. But visual is very commonly among the main things a guy considers when picking a girl to take out.

An "8" guy with no social skills does have a lower success rate -- sometimes lower than a "5" guy with a lot of social skills (aka, charisma trumps looks). Meanwhile, a "6" gal with charisma doesn't get as much attention as an "8" gal with lower social skills.

[Asker]

I disagree with the 8 gal having lower social skills having less of a chance than a 6 with social skills because for us men, social skills does not turn us on (I can speak on it as a man) sexually therefore has no bearing or influence on who we'd want to sleep with as oppose to date. Now for relationship purposes that 6 with social skills would absolutely fair better than the 8 with none.

[DishLady]

Oh... I wish I could introduce you to my one 12/10 completely vapid acquaintance... NO social skills. Everything hangs on her looks and she'll get a guy to approach based on her looks, but once they talk to her... finito... If I'm sitting next to her the guy chatting her up will LITERALLY look at me as if to silently ask if she's actually serious or just pulling his leg... She's not. She's socially inept.

By contrast, a solid 6 or 7 will get the guy's attention bc of something she says and the guy hangs with her all night, often asking for her number by the end of the night.

Did I miss something, then? I just don't think (based on what I've seen) that even a guy thinking with his pecker can withstand a gal who's completely socially inept, no matter how hot she happens to be.

[SueShe]

I always have issues when people make general statements about one gender or another. When you state that "most women...", are you referring to some 4+ billion of them, since the term "most" would account for at least 50.01% of them?

Do you honestly think that the estimated 2+ billion married women worldwide behave that way?

Of course it is easy for even "ugly" women to find a man and why? Because men are not choosy when it comes to fornicating. They are slaves of their testosterone and will grab just about anyone they can to satiate their needs.

Then again, the term "ugly" is totally subjective because a person that may seem ugly to one is a beauty to another.

[meepmeeperton]

I actually asked a similar question here Does anyone else feel women overestimate the “beauty standards” society has for them?

It seems there’s a weird dichotomy where women believe they are judged harsher for looks and only valued for their physical appearance, yet tend to be more sexually selective.

In other words men don’t have particularly high standards when actually dating women, even if they may find models or actresses with unrealistic proportions appealing. Meanwhile women DO have higher or just more particular standards with dating men.

[DarkLegacy]

This is typical millennial female hypocrisy. It is actually them that are picky and go for guys based on looks. What women are guilty of is what they will blame men for. it is the only defence they have and it is not much of a defence.

[DishLady]

@DarkLegacy Same can be said about guys -- what they accuse women of doing is usually what they're already doing... Classic projection to cover their own a**.

[Apple1996]

Just because women can find a man to have sex with doesn't mean they are acutally attractive in those mens eyes. Those same men run around screaming that 10/10 women don't exist so there so there is a big reason why women feel that way

[Asker]

True.. but then why don't women recognize and realize the difference and that they aren't on the level of the men they are sleeping with? Is it because women connect sex with emotions?

[Anonymous]

It's projecting. Because women are picky, men must also be.

[Nikki1989]

So, you know “most” women?