Why do people try changing their significant other?

[Anonymous]

Sure in a healthy relationship both people are pushing one another to be the best person they can be. That’s absolutely fine…. But sometimes there are people who are constantly trying to change one another. That leads to nothing but misery.

I don’t understand why you can’t decide you’re not right for one another. Move on so both people can find someone who more fits what you’re looking for. You’re not gonna force someone into your soulmate ladies and gentlemen.

For something such as a trait you don’t like about them. That’s who they are. All the way to a major character flaw…. If that’s what they choose to be. That’s who they choose to be. If they don’t wanna change they aren’t, the only way they’re gonna change is if they want to. More often then not they’re only going to get worse as time goes on. Move on…. Leave them behind like the bad habit they are.

Not everyone has major character or moral flaws. Sometimes it’s just something you don’t like about the other or you want the other person to be more this, that, or the other when it’s just not who they are.

[Tomisworthless]

Women want their perfect man but he doesn't exist so theyll take the closest they can get and try to change them

[Ladsin2]

Women get with men hoping they’ll change. Men get with women hoping they never will.

[Asker]

I don’t know. I see men trying to change a woman all the time. Like I can fix her…

[DishLady]

That's a popular question this year. "Changing" as in honing an existing skill or talent is great... it shows the person is supportive. Changing (or trying to change) core values and traits of an SO is not good because it build resentment in the relationship.

[Zena_lin]

It's a recipe for disaster if you're trying to change your partner. Relationships mean growth, but this does not mean molding someone into what you want them to be. Chances are, if you're consistently working to "fix" your partner, it's probably a pretty good indication that you are just not the best match.

People don't change because they're pushed; they change when they genuinely want to. If you're seeing traits or habits that just don't sit right, then in most cases, it's more about compatibility than personal failings. If you are perpetually frustrated, maybe it's time to reassess whether you're truly right for each other.

Sometimes, it's the healthiest thing ever to recognize that things aren't working in a relationship and just move on. It isn't about quitting; it is more about respecting each other's differences and finding someone whose "quirks" align better with your own.

[noohair]

Men will see a relationship as 80% good and 20% not so good and accept what they have to deal with the 20% to get the 80%. Women see the same relationship as 80% good and go to work trying to fix the 20%. The only person that they have any chance of fixing is themselves, so they destroy the relationship trying to do something that is impossible. Every human is a whole person with no spare parts, so don’t break anything.

[VanillaSalt]

You may not like giving massages but you should want to massage our partner to make them happy… change isn’t always bad. If you thought like this they wouldn’t have to tell you how they want you to change. And you are not perfect… some things you do need to change.

[Likes2drive]

Absolutely correct but women always try to change the man and they seem to always seem to change for some reason

[Asker]

It depends. Not all women do this and it depends on the man. If someone’s trying to make someone into someone they’re not. You’re doing more harm then good to this person, even if you mean well.

But like I said. If it’s a major flaw. If they don’t wanna fix it they ain’t.

[Asker]

Or if they do maybe in some cases. But be careful because some people will pretend to be someone they’re not to use another person

[Likes2drive]

Yeah unless they want to change

[Asker]

If they do that’s another story but

[Sasquach]

Hard to say, I think most efforts to change your loved ones come from a place of good intentions like helping to stop your loved ones' addiction issues, anger, or spending problems

[DrPepper12]

people who do like to collect "strays" that give them a project. Its their ego that causes this huge problem

[ballıbörek01]

BOUNDING... People get attached to each other thats why.

[DaddyDiablo]

I don't n hooe they don't do it to me or anything