Is it bad when a girl asks what I see in her?

[red324]

I've found this never really has been a good question that comes up.

[nolabels]

Ha ha.

The dreaded, "What do you see in me?" question.

It can be an entirely valid question for someone to ask if they're not sure of where they stand with you, depending on the nature of the relationship.
I'll assume that it is of a romantic nature.

That can be a difficult question to answer, but not impossible.
If necessary, take some time to consider before answering, although a hesitation in replying may tell her what she wants to know.
At the least, tell her that you'd like to consider the question before blurting out some quick bullshit that may come to mind.
That can be done successfully, but it needs to be done in a way that is appropriate.

Better maybe, as a relationship develops, keep those thoughts in mind, so such a question doesn't blindside you.
If you don't make attempts at routinely considering what you see in the relationship, it's probably not much of a relationship anyway.

In other words, always anticipate the possibility of that question coming up and you can be prepared for it.

To me, it's not necessarily a red flag question.
It can be a yellow flag, or it can be no big deal.
It does tend to usually take people by surprise, though.

If you're lucky enough to have a relationship in which you're able to instantly shower her with many examples of what she means to you, that's great.
That's also pretty much fantasyland.

If it's way too difficult for you to be able to reply to after consideration, she has her answer.

That's my opinion and my approach to relationships.
I'm far from being perfect in its execution.

I've been there.
There've been times when I could answer that question satisfactorily for myself and for the other person, and there have been times when I couldn't.

When I couldn't, that told me what I needed to know for myself, as well as for the person who asked the question of me.

Cheers and good luck to you.

[Nikki1989]

It could be a sign of insecurity, or it could be interest and curiosity. It can go either way.

[red324]

I don't know, i've found they usually ask it because i'm usually more interested in them then they are in me.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, I'd respond, "what do you think I see in you". I would never answer that question with a direct answer. It's a questioned designed to get you on the defensive.