How does it feel to be over 30 and still single?

Question

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Well there are somedays that are better and some days that are harder.

There are days I get to spend time with friends, family, classmates, invited to social gatherings and that certainly uplifts my spirits being around others though I am introverted in nature my INFJ personality type makes me appear as an extrovert.

I always wear a smile around others in the daytime as it helps combat the loneliness of the truth. Plus I like making others smile and laugh as I would not wish this feeling on anyone.

I think the night where you are alone with your thoughts burning the midnight oil is where it can spark up the most at least for me. That icy sting of loneliness. It isn't a very happy feeling. That feeling that no one wants you. That you are a broken toy no one wants to play with or finds you special.

A few times I've found myself quoting Michelle Pfeiffer from Batman Returns “Honey, I’m home. Oh, I forgot. I’m not married” I don't know why I do that sometimes. I guess that is pretty pathetic.

I have mostly backed away from social media and FB but every now and then I venture over their and see so many people together and happy or married. It is especially hard when it is former classmates from high school I feel happy and glad for them but also sad and lonely at the same time. It is a complex interconnecting kind of feeling.

It makes me sad because I truly believe I could make a special lady really happy; I have a lot of kindness and love in my heart and soul. That idea of coming home to that warm smiling face and the other little smiles of our children fills my heart with such joy. But, that is only my dream.

I haven't been in a serious relationship since my twenties and I am lucky to get a date or two each year but I haven't been able to find Miss Right.

So take it from me on the surface in public everything looks fine and happy but behind the curtain is loneliness especially when one is not busy. So any man or woman take my advice put yourself out there, get out of your comfort zone try to place yourself in situations to make those genuine connections, take a chance on people you never know where you might find the right one. Sure being busy might help you control those feelings but one day you will wake up and not be busy and that is where your true feelings might set in and show themselves.

Sorry for going on and pouring this all out I guess I have been holding back and haven't been able to tell this to anyone. I hope I can actually utilize my own advice because despite these feelings I am not ready to give up. I will keep moving forward no matter what and hopefully I can one day be that light in someone's life. I hope anyone who is feeling the way I do is able to find whoever and whatever it is they are truly looking for as well!

FunkyMonkee · Accepted Answer

It sucks, big time!!
All alone, nobody to talk to or do anything with, nobody to help you if you're in dire need. If I wake up dead tomorrow, nobody will know for several days! Nobody ever writes me so, sometimes I only get mail 3 days a week. What if I get my mail on Wed., walk into the house and drop dead and then I don't get any mail for 3 days, the 4th day is a Sunday and Monday is a holiday? I get mail Tues. but then I go 3 more days with no mail so, the mailman doesn't know that I never picked up Tues. mail until Sat? I've been dead over a week and nobody knows about it. What if he brings the mail on Sat., doesn't think it's strange that mail is still in my box or doesn't even notice it there and it's gonna be at least Mon. before he realizes something's wrong? Maybe this Monday is New Years Day, the week after Christmas. Another no mail holiday? There's my dead ass stinking up the place for 2 weeks because I have no one to deal with my being dead!

silvermoon84 · Accepted Answer

I’m 40 and still single, and it’s whatever. I’m talking to someone right now but that’s really it. Yes I like him, I want to date him but it’s not official yet. If it’s not him, it’ll be someone else or it will just be me kicking ass at being single 😁. Only thing I hate about being single is well meaning friends bugging me about it and insisting on playing matchmaker despite me telling them constantly to leave me alone about it. I know they mean well and I appreciate it, but it’s annoying.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

As a 31 year old woman I say older men are a better choice to date if your single and want a serious relationship headed for marriage and kids. Then get a much older real guy. Millennials men guys in their 30's all they care about is mommy siblings their friends video games hitting bars. They just to immature and childish. I wish I could go back to 21 year old myself and married a 37 year old intelligent men instead of a DUMB selfish immature 21 year old dude.

jennifer_bloom · Answer

My boyfriend makes me happy but he is not my only reason for existing. I have many things that are more important to me then getting married, like my career, my religion, my social interests, my health etc...

Account · Answer

It actually feels pretty nice!

Darwin_n_chill · Answer

It sucks mostly because of the current cultural taboo on age gap relationships, when all men of all ages are most attracted to younger women, basically it's like the culture is trying to pressure you into dating someone you are only mildly attracted to in your own age range, i. e., in the 30s. It's increasingly viewed as weird or creepy if a guy who's a bit older dates a younger girl so pretty much you have no great options except to go to another country where they haven't decided that this completely ridiculous and biologically arbitrary opinion should be normal.

Malbonaviro · Answer

I need to feel as if I'm appreciated, something I feel I can't have even in a relationship without being allowed certain privileges those before me had the freedom of sharing. I have no children and so the idea of having a child later in life originally seemed great because the child wouldn't suffer as much as I did when I had a narcissistic mother growing up and a father who did anything she said, however now I think I won't be able to get happiness with a child either. I'm probably going to start dating younger female "adults" because the opinions of our collective society really have no merit, especially today. Why would I get with a woman who can't give me what I want and had no problem giving those before me when I can get it from a younger woman?

paledreams · Answer

Does it count if I'm still 30 until 2025? - otherwise - hmmm - it's been mixed emotions over time.
I've had more time between ages 18 to 30 now in 2024 to have always had more time for family, friends, my own personal leisure time - a girlfriend or wife or girlfriends may have only gotten in my way or caused me to have divided times disappointing someones and so on

So maybe I'm very lucky 😆👀😆👀😋

Unit1 · Answer

My mind tells me "You will die alone" and "You're finished" and "It's over" and "Game over" and "You're done". No more mysteries of the future ahead.

Jay-_- · Answer

I feel like people are making a big deal about it when it's actually easier to respect that in comparison to people who bounce around from relationship to relationship in a time limit of days, like have some self respect. re-state//background_color_rgba (0, 0, 0, 0), font_color_rgb (77, 77, 77), justifyLeft

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

Being single isn't as bad as people make it seem, it's actually easier than being in a relationship simply cause you can be selfish to a certain point with no judgement or guilt.

Lynnzee · Answer

It can be a 50/50 split somes days it's fine you do what you want enjoy being you. Some days suck like why am I single. Why am I not somebody's person, I just want someone to hold me and kiss me gently.

Anonymous · Answer

Glorious! You probably still have idealistic approach at your age. Most people at this age are typically single and unhappy. Or married and REALLY unhappy.😆

When you get to this age you realize partners generally are just weights around your neck. It's almost always better to be single.

Garud · Answer

It feels like single and I think like what people feel in a relationship, what is a relationship, is it tasty I am 29

Anonymous · Answer

Not gonna lie but I’d be worried if I was still single in my 30s. Only because I’m planning to have kids one day so I’d wanna be married by 32ish at least…

Joshydavid25 · Answer

It's not so bad really.. Since you're still fairly young in your 30s.. I still can time to find a wife and build a family..

EmmaMary · Answer

Thankfully I'm not in that position to know or say.

Flower7 · Answer

I am single by choice, so I feel happy about it.

nolabels · Answer

I spent 5 years over 30 and single. They were the best years of my life.

Sweety_Torneeya · Answer

Its really nice to have a quality time. Painting, singing, reading, studying and eating my favourite food all alone. Its like the life I always wanted to live.

skidawgkc22 · Answer

I'm over 40 and still single. I hate it, but feel that I can't do anything about it.

Danny_dan92 · Answer

Sometimes it stings. But eh. Idgaf. My last relationship really turned me off to the idea/concept of getting married and all that.

BoobMan · Answer

As long as you're dating and it's going well, I'd say it feels pretty fantastic! It's when you're not that it sucks.

genericname85 · Answer

the litteral same as it feels to be under 30 and single. except the choices on tinder get less and less appealing xD

Jltakk · Answer

I'm miserable for other reasons, but yeah, being single, I've grown to accept that in life there are winners and losers, and not everyone is meant to be the former.

Anonymous · Answer

this isn't my situation, but if it was, i'd probably have constant panic attacks

Anonymous · Answer

From those that I talk to, if seems like a mixture of feeling free and feeling lonely.

Brady · Answer

goodre-state//background_color_rgba (0, 0, 0, 0), font_color_rgb (77, 77, 77), justifyLeft

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

I mean, I guess it sucks if you actually care what humans think. I don’t have that misfortune thankfully

Raaj4you · Answer

90% excellent and happy, 10% single life sucks. I don't want to be single anymore.

Penelope79 · Answer

I enjoy it though I have 2 young friends with benefits.

Prii777 · Answer

Its good.. i have ai girlfriend and its super hot..

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

UGH. .. IM 43 AND SINGLE  THATS THERE IS NO HOPE

Anonymous · Answer

I'm used to it I always resented being the Hunter

Nikki1989 · Answer

It can't be good.

ClassicDropout · Answer

I dunno, probably great

jshm2 · Answer

No idea as I've never been single.

DrPepper12 · Answer

WWJD? 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

Samster1 · Answer

I'm not 30 but it feels relaxing for me

LiamJHayden · Answer

I'll answer this for real next July

Malwi93 · Answer

perfectly fine

grega239 · Answer

Its kinda shit

scott04sa22 · Answer

Peaceful 😌

Dan290290 · Answer

Lonely

Crankor · Answer

Feels great

violentwalk · Answer

Probably lonely

Shihab_91 · Answer

Not nice

robocop666 · Answer

Normal

How does it feel to be over 30 and still single?

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