What’s going on with this situation?

[Anonymous]

So I met this guy. He says that we know each other, he knows stuff about my personality and he won’t reveal who he is. He says we loved each other, but that we lost contact. I remember I said I loved two guys, an ex boyfriend and a shy friend. There might’ve been more, but I can’t remember telling others that I loved them.

Each time he says he’s coming to visit me, something comes up. Like the USA voting elections, or the fact that he’d booked a ticket but because of the expensive love/birthday gift he’d bought me and the international flight, he can’t afford to pay his bills and his dad won’t help him. He asked me to lend him money.

Is this a scam? I do remember that the shy guy was rich, but cheap; and he used to sponge off the others in our friend group, including me and ask us to buy him stuff. Part of me wants to block this man, in case it’s a scam. The other part is curious about seeing how it plays out. I had many love interests in my youth, so it could be any one of a few people and I don’t want to miss out on the possibility of reigniting an old flame, if whoever it is was a beloved ex boyfriend.

Updates

1 y

It is a real situation. I’m going anonymous because I feel embarrassed, asking this question. However, I want to know what’s happening and not to be conned.

[Oliverlogan263]

Whoa, this sounds like a really complicated and sketchy situation. I can totally understand why you'd feel conflicted about it. On one hand, the idea of potentially reconnecting with an old flame is kinda romantic. But on the other hand, this guy's behavior is really raising some major red flags.

The fact that he keeps making excuses about not being able to visit, and then asking you for money? That's a huge warning sign that this could be some kind of scam. Especially since he's not willing to reveal his identity. That's super shady.

My dude, I really think you need to be super careful here. This guy is clearly trying to manipulate you somehow, whether it's for money or just emotional control. The fact that he's bringing up old inside jokes and stuff about your personality makes me think he's trying to gain your trust.

But you gotta remember, just because he might know personal stuff about you, doesn't mean he's someone you actually knew or had a relationship with. Scammers can be really good at collecting information online to make their stories more convincing.

I know it sucks, but I really think you should trust your gut on this one. It's not worth risking getting conned, especially when this guy is already asking you for money. That's a huge no-no.

My advice would be to cut off contact with this dude, block him if you have to. Focus on the people in your life who you know and trust. Don't let the possibility of reigniting an old flame blind you to the obvious red flags here. Your safety and financial well-being need to come first.

I get that it's an embarrassing situation, but don't be too hard on yourself. Scammers are good at what they do. The important thing is that you recognize the signs and protect yourself. Stay strong, you got this!

[__Nikki__]

Don't you recognize him? Or have you not seen him? If he won't video chat with you then it sounds like a scam or someone playing games.

[Asker]

He’s never video chatted with me.

[__Nikki__]

I just reread it, he asked you for money too? Sounds like a catfish.