Are these early red flags that he’s bringing in sexual innuendos early into the conversation?

[Anonymous]

I’ve been speaking to this guy who I met through online dating. He added me on social media and we’ve been chatting for the last 3 days. We’ve talked about meeting up for dates etc he said he’s looking for something long term but I’ve noticed that he tends to write some sexual innuendos in his responses to me. As an example I told him I love making beef stew and dumplings and he said “I’d love to try your dumplings one day” and then followed by “oh sorry I didn’t mean it in THAT way”. I’ve noticed he’s also brought up cuddling to me and this seems forward seeing as we haven’t met and he told me one of the best parts of being in a relationship is the cuddles. I felt disappointed because I thought we were getting on really well and had lots in common before he started throwing in the innuendos. I ignored his messages after that because I felt weirded out and then he sent me a message apologising to me. He explained to me that he meant it as a joke and it was his sense of humour and that he would understand if I didn’t want to speak to him anymore but that he still wants to continue chatting with me if I do.

And I’ve noticed that he replies with wink emojis and suggestive emojis a lot

Are these red flags and should I follow my gut instinct and stop speaking to him?

[Cmoreins]

You're having reservations already about his innuendos. If that's not what you want this early, trust that your hesitation isn't for nothing.

[MicahRaine]

This^

[WhitneySnow]

Those are red flags. Follow your instinct. But if you do dump him, don’t ghost him. Have the courage to own it and tell him why.

[Summeroflove]

The answer to that question is yes absolutely it’s a major red flag and people like that are most the time not looking or aren’t able to make a genuine connection. Just allow him to find some slut who will screw him over in the end but don’t be that slut.

If your guts telling you no…. He may be saying things in such a way so that if he’s confronted he can gaslight you as it being innocent enough and you’re the one with a dirty mind. I think If deep down you know there’s a problem you’re probably right

[Purpleronnie]

Really think this red flag nonsense it over used , and used incorrectly a lot of the time and it’s just devaluing the point in my opinion.


Putting that aside though I don’t see this is a game changer necessarily , it’s low brow base humor to use innuendo , so many folk do it although majoritively it is guys I’d agree. So many people just put up with it or fake a smile / emoji but that only encourages it. There is no way that he doesn’t know it’s at least poor humor and he needs to grow tf up.
You fire a warning shot communicating you’re not a fan and that it isn’t appropriate and if he insists on ignoring that then you remove and block.

[Fireguy17]

yeppers!
To me it pretty much seems like he is putting on a good front, but the real him might be coming through.
Let him know that you are celibate, and that you are not going to change your beliefs for anyone, just work it into a conversation, and see if that changes anything, like how often he will communicate etc.
It's not like people ever lie or misrepresent themselves online.

[MrPiercedD]

Sex it's a very basic need of every human being. On that way it's very important to me. It's more important to me than to know if you prefer apples or oranges, or if you are vegetarian, or how many siblings do you have.
Before I start dating a girl, I need to know if she is compatible with me (also about sex). If she is willing to open herself to me in that matter.
I do come up with sex topic very quickly. Almost right away (3rd day it's not right away). If for a girl it's too quick, it means that sex for her is not as important as for me, so it means no compatibility between us.
According to the doctors, each guy needs to nut at least 21 times a month to stay healthy. You are considering him to be your partner. You should consider also his health... and happiness...

[razelove]

Depends on what you're looking for, so on and so forth. Even looking for serious if it's been 2 dates and no sex I'm bouncing. Three days of talking and no meetup seems like it would never happen from my end to begin with, might as well go for a home run.

It seems like he's fine with it, and that's your style that other guys have been fine with as well though. You're not fine with how he's wanting to skip to dessert either, find someone else, let him do the same, whatever.

[subwayperson]

Yes it's online dating and just a few dates? I had say too early for sexual innuendos. He is not really interested in you , just want to get in your pants. Trust me on this one

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

• He behaves in a way you dislike (innuendos)
• You behave in a way he might dislike (ignoring)

If not talked out... I would say everyone will reach red flags soon enough

[MicahRaine]

I don't think it's a "red flag" as much as it shows that he's not looking for the same things you are.

[es20490446e]

He can just be trying to impress you the best he knows.

If you don't like someone, just let him know. And see if he can follow.

[Iron_Man]

So he’s been doing that from day one? Obviously he’s looking for sex. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that out

[Abbycado]

I would follow your instincts on this one.

[mandyfire98]

I'll In your endo

[DrPepper12]

He's just awkward and flirtatious and possibly immature give him a chance

[Flower7]

None of the things he’s said seem very serious.

[In_Trance]

3 days is too early?
Jesus

[DtMe89]

If you don't like it