What to do when a guy lacks masculine energy?

[Anonymous]

I've been seeing a guy for a week. He has most things I'm looking for: he's good looking, smart, has a good job, respectful, adventurous, good in bed etc. When align on so many things. I find him good looking but I have a hard time feeling a deep attraction to him. And I think it's because he lacks some sort of masculine energy.

He has some kind of 'cutie-pie' energy. He always calls me cute, he always wants to cuddle, and say cute things, and he tried too hard to please me etc. I think this wouldn't bother me if we've been together for a long time, but I just met this guy and this feels too much.

I feel that would be a shame to call off things just because of that, but I don't know if that could ever be improved? How can I let him know? What can I do?

[ohsheeT]

This is a hard question because he's already set in his ways

I put myself in his position and I understand what you're saying I'm a little bit deeper but a little bit rougher I like to cutie pie stuff towards you but

I would have to do it in my own way I am a man's man my hands are big they are calloused I work with my hands my body and my soul my spirit LOL

But it's the same time I can be very very soft and gentle because I can feel that through the person I'm communicating with like I can feel that through you right now on who you are and there's a time and a place to do the cuddle to hold you just the right way to kiss you the right way and slow motion

But at the same time make you feel secure and if I'm out getting dirty I'm going to pull you right down into it with me I don't know how you would change that in a guy I think we're pretty well set and who we are when we get to a certain age but you can talk to him about it
Once again I put myself in his shoes I mean if you like somebody if you love somebody deep enough you can figure a way out to change or to see it their way

I mean I am who I am and I have to say that is just me it's I feel and I see two sides to everything so I can become if I'm not already that person energy is energy and you either become one with it and that last long long time are you fight yourself with it and it's just not worth it then

[Summeroflove]

Well let me start off by saying not everyone is meant to be. You both can be great people but not compatible romantically unfortunately you jumped into bed too fast with him. You’re never going to build anything with anyone if you keep doing this.

Love isn’t necessarily about what someone’s job is or anything like that. It’s who they are as a human being and you should never try to change someone else just like you should never let someone change who you fundamentally are. Yes, people who love one another will push one another to be the best versions of themselves.

You need to be honest with him both for your own sake as well as his. That you think he’s a great guy but you don’t feel like it’s meant to be because you don’t feel that deep attraction. He as well as yourself deserves someone who loves you for who you are. He needs someone who loves him for him…. If that’s not you then it’s not you.

I’m not saying you can’t date. I’m not saying those feelings may not develop later. But you need to be honest with one another about where you stand with each other. The last thing you want to do is go too fast and ignore how you feel. To end up in a major disaster.

Some people aren’t meant to be. Not that they are bad people I’m sure you both have a lot to offer. But maybe you’re better off as friends.

[Anonymous]

He’s putting on his best face right now, this is all new and he sounds like he’s in the honeymoon phase, not lacking masculine energy. Don’t feel pressured to rush things along or match his energy, it’s already enough you gave him sex in only a few days.

[Anonymous]

Most people do what they can to impress people they like in the beginning. It's how so many people find themselves in abusive relationships. Everyone is nice in the beginning. Has nothing to do with a lack of "masculine energy"

[Anonymous]

If you don't like him for who is, end the relationship. Don't try to change him.

[jahaims]

You are too immature for a healthy relationship