Why is being a man so terrible in this world?

Question

Being a man s**ks! It’s like when you’re first born, if you didn’t win the gene lotto, you’re screwed! You can’t find a partner, you can’t make friends. etc. As a Man You have so many expectations from people and if you don’t fit that, you’re not important and not cared about. Like if you don’t have money or have a job as a man, you’re ridiculed and criticized. Or If you don’t have looks or money, you can’t find a partner no matter how good of a person you are. And if you’re autistic and other stuff, they’re considered excuses or more than just flaws.

BCRanger10 · Accepted Answer

Everyone is welcome to their own, but I for one absolutely love being a man.

First things first. You have to understand the game that's being played here. Those who claim to have "high expectations" are just saying that because in reality, they don't expect much of men at all. They are SO DESPERATE to believe that no man can and will be intelligent, strong, and virtuous and are just trying to find any excuse they can to keep on believing that we're all failures even if we have succeeded, and it drives them crazy when we do. Up front, that might sound like a rotten deal, but the exact opposite is true. You don't have to worry about getting their approval! You're never going to get it anyway, so develop a sense of freedom, peace, and adventure about it. Don't play their game, or at least not by their rules.

As far as not having money or a job? That's an easy fix. Take a job in retail and build from there. Or go to a trade school or something like that. I started out in retail (four years), then moved into warehousing for a satellite TV provider (seven years), then to a manufacturing company where I spent a year on the floor and then got promoted to the role I have now. Sometimes, the best opportunities lie in doing the work in the hours and in the conditions and with the people that no one else wants to do, and showing up on time with a good attitude about it. So even though I'll gladly smack down the "men are so stinky and stupid and ugly and useless" garbage that I see from overgrown teenagers who hate their fathers, brothers, husbands, and sons, I will still hold men to account.

If you want more on this part specifically, read this MyTake that I wrote last year.

So yeah, being a man is a struggle, but as long as you have the kind of mindset and thinking that you've shown here, YOU LOSE. Don't be "that guy".

EzraIsShy76028 · Accepted Answer

I mean being a woman is no walk in the park either.

Being physically weaker. If a man wants to rape you or kill you, and there's no police or anyone else around, and you don't have a weapon to defend yourself, you're pretty much screwed. And if you're an attractive woman this is even worse, as men are more likely to rape attractive women.

Men will always think they have it harder, and women will always think they have it harder. That's just how it is. Same goes for Black people vs White people, gay people vs straight people, younger generations vs older generations, etc.

The expectations that men are supposed to have everything together and hold the entire rest of the family together; with no help from anyone else and not being allowed to show weakness, it sucks, true.

However there's also the fact that women are generally taken much less seriously, unless it's about sexual harassment or child custody. People will assume the man is smarter and more competent than the woman. Most men see it as a weakness to be led by a woman. Being a woman in general is perceived as weakness, for example, "you throw like a girl, stop being a little pussy, stop being a drama queen, etc."

And the list goes on and on.

Who has it worse is somewhat subjective, and people are gonna be biased towards what they already believe anyway, so there's no changing anyone's minds.

Men though have undisputedly been at the top of the world literally as long as humans have existed, about 300k years or so. Women's rights didn't really start till around the 1850s. And to make any significant progress took way longer. And women have really only started to arguably "surpass men" in around the past decade or 2. So women having it better than men would only be an extremely recent thing. Perhaps even a blip in human history untill men "surpass women" again.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I think you are wrong. Actually, being a woman is harder. you dream of being with the most beautiful woman even though you are ugly and penniless. If you can get out of this utopian dream, I am sure you could find a sincere woman who loves you for who you are and doesn't care that you are autistic. But you are always so pessimistic because you are constantly running after better looking women. Be a little humble and run after average women like yourself. Remember, not every woman approaches a man for money and status.

Sparklight · Accepted Answer

It just so happens that I was just reading an article on Mental Health. Did you know that June is Men's Mental Health Month. Did you know that men triple the suicide rate of women. The article listed several reasons, but I think everybody may have it difficult but in different ways.

ohsheeT · Answer

Speak for yourself. Or who ever your listening to. I could care less what Society.
Or anybody else says you're your own individual? We're not grouped together as one. We're all individuals so whatever they're saying. They don't know because they don't know me or probably you or anybody else

AviatorTom · Answer

Not terrible for me... and many other men.

MisterWack · Answer

Being any gender sucks too tbh, stereotypes put expectations / rumors to your name even when you did nothing wrong to even be worthy of being rumored of being weird.

And yeah if you don’t win the gene lottery, you can wind up selling your dreams of being an actor, singer, or celebrity in general. If a man is born shorter, he has issues finding a partner. Not impossible, but reduced. Genes bring diseases, health issues that stay with you for your life, and other negatives to carry.

As a man, you are outcasted from society once you don’t have money, job, house, or food because they assume the homeless man got that way through drugs, dirty deeds, and The Devil though somehow praise corporate CEOs who made their money swindling workers, consumers, and even getting subsidies / tax havens from the government.

If you have Autism, Handicaps, wounds of war (including PTSD) and no one to support you…. Feels like the whole world is against you. Sucks to be a gender, therefore sucks to be a man.

Effably · Answer

While I understand where you are coming from surely we do not have a noticably harder time making friends? Friends get trickier to make as we age but are quite tricky for women too.

As for all the rest? Its a common feeling. As kids both boys and girls have value simply for being. As we age and become teenagers biys tend to lose this intrinisc value. It is liberating to the extent that society stopped caring about you, but it also means that suddenly you need to justify why you matter.

A lot of guys never get over that mental shift. We also tend to spiral the expectations just like you did. In reality just being pleasant towards people and kind, while also self-supportive is absolutely enough and not a crazy expectation.

But the disconnect that you suddenly only matter for what you bring is common. I would imagine women have a similar feeling around looks.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Struggling with dating do to appearance happens in both genders.

Making friends is very easy, finding people I want to stay friends with is hard, but thats because of relatability, not because have a penis and balls.

Finding a relationship is also relatability issue, and a location one because of the lack of relatable women in my area.

No one expects anything from me despite knowing I'm capable of a lot more than most people.

I'm not broke or jobless, I'm actually doing quite well, but when I was broke and jobless, no one was critical of me for it.

You just have a shitty circle of contacts.

SotiCoto · Answer

Oh for sure we Autistic folk just instantly run into all sorts of blocks that nobody warned us about and there is no immediate way around it. We have to spend an undue amount of time just figuring out things most people take for granted, so we end up working much harder just to get lesser results... and it never gets any easier.

But honestly... if you can get a job and hold it down well enough to survive on the money, that is probably enough. Relationships are overrated and these days even the mundanes are struggling with them. It is so much less stressful to just commit to living and dying alone and not think about it.

Zack-Bann · Answer

Oh boo fucken hoo

Transition if you’re not happy!

Being a man is amazing.
You have all the advantages in the world
Endless options

And endlessly opportunities to turn into a successful man

Whining about your predicament is entirely up to you.

There are kids who don’t own shows working 20 hours a day in a sulfur mine

Comparing to them your worst possible problem is trivial at best

Truthatanycost · Answer

I absolutely love being a man... and being a man of God is the icing on the cake. I can tell from your post that your identity lies within other peoples expectations. When your identity lies in Christ, that is when you truly become free. Glory To God! In Jesus' name!

Communicationisking · Answer

Na I thought that from time to time throughout my life but it is not true no matter how much you believe it right now, love/relationships can blossom from the most random places... without getting to spiritual what you project into this world is what you will get in return

meepmeeperton · Answer

I like being a man personally. There's more to life than money and a chiseled jawline

abc3643 · Answer

Congratulations! You are unique and have unique problems... just like everyone else. Join the club! We meet at the bar at 5PM after work.

Apple1996 · Answer

Life is what you make it. It seems like right now you are only focusing on the negative things about being a man. Maybe think more positively and find the things you are good at

hahahmm · Answer

Because you bought into the idea that modern people know what's best. I'm old school. So is my wife. No problems. I mean life isn't always perfect but we try. Check out my mytakes sometime.

RavVid · Answer

It's not. You need to be more self reliant and happy with your own company. The need for companionship makes you weak so you are best off not indulging in it.

slatyb · Answer

It's fine for me, but it will suck for you as long as you blame external circumstances and do nothing to meet them. Counseling could help. It helped me when I was older, wish I had it at your age.

jshm2 · Answer

LOL, reads like a you problem, not a "man" problem.  Maybe stop being such a victim, and take charge of your life?

exitseven · Answer

It is not. Being a man is awesome. You get to have sex with women and you can belch in public.

Kelley1 · Answer

Because 70% of men are worthless and should be neutered by the age of 16.

avery58 · Answer

Being a woman is worse in plenty of places. It's a big world, not just the West exists.

Filthy_Immigrant · Answer

we are tools and they refuse to see us as anything else. glad to see you've woken up brother. just remember that you dont have to be their if you refuse

Slaydragon · Answer

the world is not harder for men. actually it easier.  The problem is just that men tend to complain and rebel a lot more.  women suffer silently. men set the world on fire when they get upset

MannMitAntworten · Answer

After reading this it seems I must have won the “gene lotto” … I have great friends and women.

DCVsMarvel2 · Answer

Being a man isn't bad. Being a shitty man, is

JazzieJanna · Answer

That also refers as a woman to.

AngryCarl2 · Answer

The grass is greener on the other side, is it not?

Charliefretz329 · Answer

Being a Man is wonderful. The penis is problematic but the rest is amazing

beefcakebradybatson · Answer

Try being a BLACK man. You Billy Bobs don't know how GREAT you have it !!!

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

Because… feminism

fish5505_87 · Answer

I don't mind it?

SamWinchester058 · Answer

Kicked the harpies nest with this one. 😂😂

Anonymous · Answer

I think you're mostly right about it.

Anonymous · Answer

You can blame social media

Reem12345reem · Answer

LOL..

chocolatetwopointo · Answer

this is hilarous💀

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