Dating

What should I do about confusing friends with benefits/situationship?

I (26f) met this guy (35m) through mutual friends. We lived nearby each other, got along great, and went on some dates. He would also come over and just talk to me for hours after we both got off work. At the time, he said he wasn’t sure what he was looking for with me due to getting deployed soon after we had met, and he was moving out of state after that and didn’t know where. But he also said he really liked me and wasn’t talking to anyone else. We stopped talking as much when he got deployed (6 months), but never fully lost touch. I ended up moving to another state, and he happened to get stationed there when he got back. Now we are about an hour and a half away from each other. He texts me more and we’ve hung out 3 times since he got here 2 months ago. He is kind of an inconsistent communicator, he will go 1-2 days without talking to me. We don’t go on dates, just to his apartment. However, it seems like with his job in the army he is very busy and often can’t plan ahead to hang out because he gets called in to work so often, and now that we live farther apart we can’t really just stop by. He said he told his mom and family about me. And that he’s not with anyone else. I don't know if that last part is true. I definitely have feelings for him but I don’t know if I should verbalize them. I am definitely confused about the situation, but I also worry that if I try to clarify things with him at this point, when we are both busy (I am in school and might be moving out of state again for a nursing program, I’m getting a divorce, etc.), I will ruin the chances of an actual relationship in the future when we are both in more stable situations. But at the same time, I also kind of want to know what he’s thinking. And I would be happy to be in a relationship with him even if things are complicated. I just wish I could ask him to text me a little more consistently, or be more upfront with me if he just wants to keep it casual, but obviously I can’t do that right?

What should I do about confusing friends with benefits/situationship?
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