A dad involved with a girl his daughter's age?

[Anonymous]

Say you are 21 and your parents aren't together. How would you feel if your dad was hitting on a girl your own age that he met, and telling her he wants to take her out, but you don't know her and he didn't know her as a kid.

say they have a thing and hook up. How would you feel?

Do you know of any dads, your own or your friends' who might do that?

What do you think of a situation like this?

Would you think the girl is disgusting? If she was dating your dad would you hate her or give her a chance?

Would you think the dad is disgusting?

Has this ever happened to anyone you know of?

Do you think a man would go for a girl who is in her early 20s if he had a daughter the same age but this girl does not know his daughter and is interested in him?

[stubbsy]

Yes it does and always will happen, because girls look for the more mature man who has a settled life, and although I can understand that it would be hard for the girl, but what she needs to try and do is not look at the age and not judge because of the age, what she needs to do is try for her dads sake, because there is absolutely nothing wrong in this setup, she is an adult, the girl who is attracted to the dad is an adult, and the dad is an adult to, so really, everyone should act like adults and all try to get along. To many people put unnessasary objects in the way and try to hard to find fault in things they don't quite know how to understand, so the best thing to do is forget about everything negqative about the situation, and just rely on the possitives, one being the dad seems happy about her, the chances are, the girl will get on great and become like a sister, maybe even joke about the step mother part, or it only lasts a while and the father moves on, pleasing everyone, but an effort to keep the peace should be made, because if she thinks about it, she wouldn't like it if her dad tried stopping her dating someone his age, hope this helped slightly,x

[Anonymous]

He might consider a girl that age, or find her hot, but if he's any sort of a decent man, he would never date her because of the effect it would have on his daughter.

Their relationship (as father and daughter) would doubtless be harmed by this May-December romance.

I wouldn't think the dad is disgusting. But I'd question the fact that he would be putting his own happiness ahead of his daughters mental well being and their relationship. I certainly wouldn't think the girl is disgusting. She's just attracted to an older man. Nothing wrong with that, especially since she doesn't know the daughter.

[kheserthorpe]

If he's 60, can he not date 42 year old women because they're his daughters' age?

[Opinion Owner]

That's not what the QA says. The QA says specifically you (as in the daughter) are 21.

I can read. What's your excuse buddy?

[kheserthorpe]

Your argument was that it would be wrong for a man to have a relationship with any woman his daughters age because of the impact on his adult daughter. So I asked _you_ if you would still hold this view if everyone involved was another 20 years older.

Otherwise, you don't agree with your own argument, and simply think 20 40 is too wide an age range given the maturity of the average 20 year old - which has nothing to do with the daughter.

[Opinion Owner]

60-42 is hardly a May-December romance.

Age differences matter less, when the couples get older. That's why it's important to note that this involves a 21 year old. If she was 42 this wouldn't be an issue.

[kheserthorpe]

That was kind of my point. I agree in most cases 40+ to 20 is too wide, but whether or not the guy has a daughter that age doesn't matter. If it did, then 60-40 would not be okay either. Dating people the age of a (potential) child doesn't matter, dating 40-20 is pushing it for other reasons.

[Stacyzee]

I've been known to date men old enough to be my father. But however, if the shoe was on the other foot and my Dad was dating a woman old enough to be my sister it is only natural that I would disgusted. But however, it is my Dad's life and he has to do what makes him happy. If that is a younger woman, then so be it. As long as she isn't using him for anything and truly loves him then I'd be fine with it. It would take some getting used to though.

[CindiluvsFriends]

Well...my Dad is deceased and even if he were alive,he wouldn't-he'd be with my Step-Mom:)

However,I have plenty of 'guys' who hit on me(dating sites)who are in that age group(I'm 40). I have an almost 18yo daughter! So no,couldn't do it. Ick.

[justlilly]

This kind of thing happens more than people realize. It has happened to few of my friends. What I can't believe is that the dads who do this actually don't realize that it is going to hurt their relationship with their kids.

[kheserthorpe]

If he's 70, can he not date 55 year olds because they're almost the same age as his 50 year old daughter, and it would be so traumatic for her?

Get over it. 21 is an adult, you're swimming in the deep end of the pool with all the grown ups now.

[CindiluvsFriends]

But it's sick!

[kheserthorpe]

Sick in what way? Is it sick for a 60 year old and a 40 year old to be together?

If you think 21 and 40 is wrong, you can argue that, but I don't think there's anything magic about 'you could have a daughter that age'. There are women who have kids at 15, would it be 'sick' for them at age 55 to sleep with a 40 year old? I don't think so.

[sweet_18]

I would be mortified to say the least. And I would feel estranged from my dad. I think I might disown him and our relationship would never be the same. And yes I would think the girl was disgusting.

[Anonymous]

most of the guys are saying they think it's a OK, while we find it repulsive.

interesting...

[Anonymous]

does he still think he's 21? yeah I think that's f***ing gross but if she's OK with being a home wrecker, that's great. I would lose respect for my dad to be honest, it has nothing to do with being an 'adult' at that point.

[Asker]

How is she a homewrecker, if she met him while he was single and his daughter doesn't even live with him either.

[Anonymous]

The girl might have seen American Beauty 1999. :DD

[Anonymous]

that's disgusting