Haven't heard from my boyfriend in almost 2 days...Should I contact him?

[Anonymous]

This question is for the ladies who've experienced this. My boyfriend usually texts me every day and says good night and now lately texts have been getting less frequent and I didn't hear from him at all in almost 2 days. I don't want to text him because I want to give him space. I just don't get why he's doing this. I know he's working but everyone gets a lunch break, so cmon, there's no excuse. I don't want to make a big deal about it so I'm not going to say anything to him. I just don't get it. I saw him about 5 days ago and it was great. So I just don't understand why he'd stop talking to me. I want to wait for him to contact me..should I?

[Tiffanyy]

My boyfriend used to do something similar to this. He tried playing hard to get even though he already had me, which he didn't understand that once you have someone you stop doing that and you give them your all. So I know how you feel, I used to ask all my friends the same question you asked above because I feared that if I did talk to him then I would be bothering him and that he would breakup with me. But after days of feeling like I meant nothing to him I decided that I would talk to him. Because I mean think about it, if he can go that long without talking to the girl he cares about then maybe he doesn't really care at all... So what I would do (or have done for that matter), is text him and say something meaningful but simple. That way you are being the better person because after all you are still a couple. Tell him that your just checking up on him making sure he's alright and that you've been thinking about him and you hope to talk to him soon. If he flips out and calls you clingy then he doesn't deserve you because you obviously have a heart because you are worried. What's the worst that can happen? You'd breakup. But since this guy hasn't really been talking to you anyway, maybe you'll find someone better! good luck with this I know how difficult and nerve wrecking it can be.

[PrettyGirl305]

I know how you feel. My boyfriend haven't contact me in two days. He got upset cause I didn't ask him was it ok to drop his clothes off knowing the machine was broken until Monday. I offered to pick them back up and even pay for them. Should I contact him again after I apologize to him?

[dancing201]

if you guys are officially boyfriend and girlfriend...i see no reason why you shouldn't call him. just call him and ask him what's up

[PrettyGirl305]

Why if I reach out to him and he haven't contact me back? He's 8 years older he should know better I think

[LondonBoy]

Don't contact him. He's got too comfortable - he's just getting over the first flush of 'new relationship' and is cooling off. I guess it's now you'll find out whether there's any solid foundations in this relationship. Maybe he's the type who needs a constant challenge, in which case you might try being unavailable at least once a week (you're staying in on your own, or you're going out with a girlfriend, whatever - just enough to keep him from regarding you as 100% owned). Sad to admit, but my own 'standard relationship' with women only ever lasted six/seven months before I got bored and moved on - it wasn't until I met my wife that I realized what I'd been doing - and she's kept me in that 'first flush' for more than 12 years just by holding back that last 1% of herself; thus the challenge for me to 'conquer' remains! I guess all I'm saying is to always keep a little of yourself back, just to keep him interested and intrigued... and hint that you always have other options available to you...

[Asker]

Thanks so much for your insight. I appreciate it. We've been together for almost 9 months and I told him I loved him a few months ago and he told me he doesn't love me yet. We also live about 2 hours apart and so we only see each other once or twice a week. I used to work near him and saw him more often but now I lost my job. So I don't really know how to be challenging because we don't see each other much. His exes were all really challenging and not into him that much and cheated on him

[Asker]

and dumped him. so his heart has been broken very badly and he has his gaurd up. I want to believe that he's just scared to love again but I don't know if its that or if its just that I'm not keeping his interest because I'm too "sweet" and reassuring.

[TheUglyOne]

Initiate. If he whines or cries or accuses you of being clingy, well that tells you a lot about him, and consider yourself dodging a bullet. If you guys are official, then 2 days without contact sounds like a reasonable period for you to initiate.

Even better, give him a call, preferably outside his work hours so you won't be interupting him.

[Anonymous]

This is not normal. You have been together for 9 months for Gods sake. It's okay to text/call him. If you were doing it every hour that would be one thing but calling him 1-2 times a day and sending a few texts is normal and expected and there is nothing wrong with that. If I haven't heard from my boyfriend in two days I would have a search party out and be worried to death.

[Anonymous]

Don't initiate contact. Don't break up either. He is shutting down just let him be. In the meantime, forget about him. My advice : upgrade your hair cut, your wardrobe and look for a new hobbie because once he gets out of whatever cave he thinks he is hiding in, you will kinda be busy.
If he comes talk to you like its not big deal don't answer until he comes first with an explanation, if he doesn't, ignore him. Men have needs but they tend to be selfish.

[Hypnos0929]

Just call him. Maybe he's tired a lot or just needed a bit of time to himself.
I use to work 16 hour shifts and I can tell you that I needed time alone after those

[PrettyGirl305]

Thank you the best answer so far.