Do you prefer very structured events/trips or more go-with-the-flow?

[DishLady]

Hi Guys and Gals,

I host/attend a lot of events for work. They tend to be classy, structured things (even the low-key social ones). There's a dress code, specific goals (business/social/etc.) and the optics are always great, regardless of who the hosts are. Attendance tends to be more focused and folks know what to expect (in the good way).

A former acquaintance who had tagged along with me for a few months to learn how I do stuff... and bc I make my events look easy he thought he could just snap his fingers and make events happen. But he's a disorganized, chaotic sort of guy the events reflected that... Some folks would turn up in ratty sweaters and others in Armani suits. I guess it was his attempt to be "edgy" but optics always look off and uninviting -- like a bunch of frat boys walked into an elite cigar lounge by accident. I heard from a few people about the latest events... bc they wanted to know when my next one was since I make sure everyone mingles and connects with other people.

But I know the "best" sort of events are probably only semi-structured to leave room for organic fun.

So I'd like to know what sort of trips and events you'd prefer. More or less structured?

[Staximus]

I don't like much structure unless it's required to keep people alive or build\fix something the right way. I don't go to events to hobnob with snobs. It's usually a concert, birthday or holiday celebration, barbeque, group camping trip, beach bonfire, etc. Nothing formal except weddings and funerals.

[DishLady]

Not snobby stuff, but connecting with people, you know?

[Staximus]

Yeah I don't do all that fancy shit

[OlderAndWiser]

I am president of my congregation and also president of my fraternity's alumni association, so I plan and host a number of events every year. For my church, our events are very structured, because our congregation is mostly retired folks (I call them "one hundred shades of grey.") For our alumni association events, they are mostly happy hour events which are attended by people who know each other very well, so no structure is needed. We have an annual founders' day luncheon which is attended by undergrads and alumni, it is structured because it is a lunch, keynote speaker, and awards presentations. When we have our annual holiday party (I would call it a Christmas party but it is held in early November,) it is dinner and an open bar (everyone is carded and given wrist bands to avoid underage drinking. There is absolutely no structure to the event.

[queenofcardio]

A mixture of both would be ideal. Things planned in advanced with some room for fun

[beenherebefore]

I like when things are well planned and there's a itinerary.

[HawkPerception]

For an event, I think structure is pretty important. For example, a wedding should have planned events, like when each person speaks, when food is served, when it's time to dance, and what music is played when. That way everyone knows what to expect and can plan their time accordingly. You can still be somewhat flexible, like if someone who isn't planned to make a speech, decides to pick up a glass and make one. But otherwise structured is necessary. That goes for most social events.

As for trips, I think a little more flexibility can be allowed. If people don't like whatever whatever they're doing, they should be able to go and do something else at their own will.

And when it's just a small group or a date, I think you can have a rough plan, and then play it by ear.

[worldscolide]

Go with the flow... Though the wife and I more and more prefer not to go to events.

My wife being autistic, doesn't deal well with crowds, or strangers.. And me, I just find my self less and less willing to deal with people in general.

For example, a trip to Walmart on a Saturday morning leaves both of us wanting to nap for the rest of the afternoon lol..

[exitseven]

I do not go to many of them but when I worked for a major high tech company we had a very elaborate Christmas party. They actually rented the State House for the evening. There was a live orchestra and an amazing variety of food including an amazing Prime Rib station. And of course an open bar. I was not going to go but my boss insisted. It was pretty impressive but not really my favorite thing. After 9/11 happened the company cut back on all the fun stuff they used to do. We just had a party for my department which was about 30 people and it was in a local restaurant that was owned by the uncle of one of the sales guys. It was not fancy but I had a lot of fun.

[CubaPirate]

A bit of a mixture tbh

[DishLady]

So a fun party for folks our age... what would be the sort of thing you'd attend for sure?

[CubaPirate]

One with drinks where everyone brings some vinyl records to play

[Daytoday79]

Go with the flow for me

[zombiewoof]

A bit outlined, but able to adlib