Which was tougher for you raising a teen son or a teen daughter?

[brittany155]

[IveGotNoName]

I haven't ever done it, but my parents would probably say a daughter. I grew up with strongly religious parents. I had to tell them I didn't believe in a god, because I hate lying, they saw that as something I did against them. Because of religion I was not allowed to have a boyfriend either, and I wasn't going to get one either, I was almost actively avoiding it, but it just snuck up on me. My brothers never did anything like that... but they were actually not actively told they couldn't date anyone... because they were boys... and you know... double standards

[little_rose]

my parents think neither me or my brother were difficult kids. We're very honest with them and I've only gotten into trouble once.

They say my brother is more demanding (I think he's annoying) than me but I think they just weren't as harsh with him as they were with me. They have NEVER disciplined him while I'd get lectured when I'd accidentally lost my stuff at school.

I'm the elder and they say I was independent and very easy to be with. I'm not a picky eater, I'm disciplined and I always try to understand. They thought my brother would turn out like that too but he's just so needy and not flexible at all. My mom has to cook his dinner separately. He's grown up now but he still heavily relies on my parents while I'd dream of being on my own at just 14.

I don't know why they never discipline him and then they always say he's needy and not understanding.

[Anonymous]

I have a teen son.
He's literally no problem at all because I spent a lot of time with him when he was little.
I raised him. Now that he's a teen he's always off on his own and he's never in trouble so far.
He's much better than I was as a teen.
Moral of the story, work less and bond with your kids at a young age.

[little_rose]

my dad says that all the time haha
he says me and my brother were unproblematic kids because he devoted time to us and showed us that he truly loves us. I don't know how much truth that statement bears because ik some kids who have turned out wrong despite having loving parents. But GOD I LOVE MY OLD MAN

[Opinion Owner]

@little_rose
That's sweet.
I think my strategy was to make sure my son understood me and respected me.
I never spanked him, I just took time to ait down and talk with him.
I always felt that it was better for him to understand why he should or should not do certain things.
I didn't want him to fear me and think that he should just behave when I'm there out of fear.
He's also very kind hearted just naturally so that helps.

[loves2learn]

You sound like an amazing dad. Really.

[Opinion Owner]

@loves2learn
Thanks, I really wanted to be a dad and I was at a stage in my life where I was very trusting and loving, patient and idealistic. I
I researched different parenting techniques and I really made him my priority.
Of course now I'm older, divorced, jaded and lost, but at least I did a good job raising my son.
I'll always feel like I accomplished something.

[loves2learn]

Raising your son right is the best thing you could ever do with your life.

It’s a give and take with my husband. He tends toward more strict discipline than me. Today he said “your mom can determine if you’ve turned your attitude around and cleaned your room enough to play outside with friends.” Of course he did. :)

[Opinion Owner]

@loves2learn
That's nice, for me it was the opposite.
My ex had a bad temper and I could tell when she had lost it with our son.
I would have to be the calm one and take him and go sit with him in time out.
Otherwise she would want to drag him by his arm or hit him.
She didn't understand that you have to be the mature one in the situation.
If a small child is screaming and crying you don't flip out and scream back at them.
You have to be smarter, calm them down and then give them options, like maybe he lost his favorite toy until he decided to behave.
I'm glad that you guys give your kids options and consequences.
To me it's better than just slapping them and teaching them to hit others every time there's an issue.

[loves2learn]

So much. I’m with you. I’m the gentle parent.

[Opinion Owner]

@loves2learn
Yeah it's weird how people like us end up with our polar opposites. LoL!
I guess it's good to have a balance otherwise the kids might turn out too nice and get walked on by others.
Who knows?
I was hit as a kid until I was fast enough to out run my mom, but I was also TERRIBLE as a teenager.
Like I would wake up with my mom standing over me with the cops on the phone.
Then I would go throw up in the kitchen sink.
I just wanted to try something different raising my son.
So far so good. 🙂

[WAT88]

@little_rose no that doesn't really happen

[Mark-IV]

It’s universally known that raising a daughter is much more difficult and this is in every culture regardless of their norms.
Girls need strong but loving fathers to grow normal but guys seem a lot less demanding

[WAT88]

It nights seem that way to not so smart people like you just in reality that's obvious bullshit.

[NorthAfrican]

It's more expensive to raise daughters than sons because sons and daughters have the same basic needs (school, food, toys, clothes, doctor appointments) but as they get older girls need to spend more for fashion and make up etc.
My suitcases are usually much bigger and full than my brother's.
But otherwise, my parents don't differently educate us. They think we were fairly easy to educate and we were good kids/teenagers.

[loves2learn]

Sports like hockey can be expensive. My boys don’t play hockey though. Lol

[NorthAfrican]

@loves2learn true but maybe the girls do sports too no :p?

[loves2learn]

Definitely. Sporty hockey girls probably will spend less on fashion and such.

[WAT88]

No good parent just gives their kid whatever they want.

[Apple1996]

My kids are still little so I have no idea what raising a teen is like. My parents have 2 girls and 4 boys and say by far the boys were harder to raise since they're less independent and take longer to mature then girls do.

[exitseven]

I think it was harder to raise boys. I was lucky though, my kids did not get into much trouble.

[brittany155]

thank you for your post you have cool opinions

[exitseven]

😊😊😊😊

[jahaims]

Neither of my kids are teens yet. That being said I would imagine raising a teen daughter would be tougher. I was a teenage boy once so I have a better understanding of the situation and would be better suited to help. Teen girls are more susceptible to sexual assault and that worries me. As a teenager I saw a lot of female peers pitfalls. Not ever being a teenage girl makes it harder for me to help her avoid those pitfalls.

[loves2learn]

I can tell ya right now, teen daughters are harder. I was one. My boys aren’t teens yet tho.

[awkfemme]

My mom says both. I was (and still am) a bit dramatic at times and I love talking to everyone and singing all the time. My brother was the hardest when he was going through puberty but once he passed that he was all good.

[Anonymous]

i'm just going to give my opinion and say it's probably tougher raising a teen daughter. i mean, the periods, mood swings, worrying if she'll get pregnant as a teen... yeah... what's the most that teen boys do? masturbate and play video games?

[Curmudgeon]

Everyone I know says definitely daughters. (In fairness, from birth to pre-teenage, the boys are harder and more rambunctious).

[loves2learn]

Accurate. Exhausted boy mom here.

[Curmudgeon]

@loves2learn If it is any consolation, that will flip from 13 forward. (Source: my own parents)

[loves2learn]

So only 5-8 more years to go. 😩

[DeltaCharlieEcho]

Trick question. You can’t raise a teen daughter; you can only hope she becomes someone else’s problem sooner or later. Hopefully that man will be able to convince her to grow the fuck up.

[Wiredone]

It was definitely harder to raise a son. Boys like to get into more mischief than girls.

[Curmudgeon]

From zero to twelve, totally this. But from 13 on, maybe not...

[Wiredone]

@Curmudgeon mine lasted until 17. At 18 he finally calmed down

[loves2learn]

Really? Maybe your girls were just better at not getting caught. 😈

[Wiredone]

@loves2learn my daughter was good until she hit 23 years old. Thank God it only lasted 4 years.

[loves2learn]

@Wiredone my parents would DIE if they knew the sexual things, drugs and drinking I did as a teen. I’m an only child. Perfect child. They think I didn’t have sex until marriage - 5 years into the relationship.

[Wiredone]

@loves2learn neither of my kids drink. She's been with her boyfriend for a while now. He's the one who straighten her out. I know they're having sex, I can't stop them. They're both over 21.

[loves2learn]

Why would you want to stop them? That’s very normal. Especially for that age.

[Archerer]

Daughter... Though I do not have a son, I could only imagine.

[TheEbonyEnchantress]

Teen daughter. Just because of the fear of her getting pregnant

[awebee]

Im 40i had my kid at 21, he's 18now.. he was as and is a peice of cake
Never a problem

[Anonymous]

Sons seem to get in more trouble, girls need more things

[loves2learn]

My husband was hit. I’m truly thankful I wasn’t. I was neglected and ignored but never hit

[Opinion Owner]

@loves2learn yeah I never hit my kids except on the butt on a rare occasion, their mom was the disciplinary one

[loves2learn]

I can’t hit my kids. Feels too wrong

[Opinion Owner]

@loves2learn it wasn’t often and it was not hard but yeah it’s not really necessary

[loves2learn]

I get that and agree. There are other ways.

I had an experience with my 5 year old that forever changed me.

I looked out my window because there were sirens and I saw my 5 yo on his scooter going from drive way to drive way through the street not looking.

I ran out there in bare feet to grab him and drag him inside.

He tried to disobey me and pulled away just as a cop car was barreling down our street. We were in front of my suv so the cop would never have seen. I literally grabbed him moments before he would have been obliterated.

I yelled at him and said I can’t be worrying about if he’s alive or not. I scared him but he scared me.

He sat on my lap and cried and I cried too.

[Opinion Owner]

@loves2learn That must have been scary

[loves2learn]

It was very scary. I still didn’t want to hit him. And he learned his lesson. He was scared too.

[Opinion Owner]

@loves2learn well that’s good , you should never have to hit them

[RachelWhite]

It might be harder to raise a teenage daughter

[Maspolomas]

I only have boys so they weren’t to bad

[Dinosaursandanime65]

I don’t think I’m hard to deal with

[Yourman555]

Daughter! No question about it.

[Kelly6]

Only have teen son

[Anonymous]

daughter