How do you act natural around your crush?

[Anonymous]

I'm friends with him and it was going fine until one fine morning almost a month ago I realized I could date that man and even possibly marry him. Now whenever we stumble upon each other, my cheeks get warm and pink, I can't make eye contact, I fidget or smile way too much unnecessarily. He does understand I think, he starts looking at the sky, gets quieter or plays with his watch or something. But we do talk to each other whenever we see each other. How do I be cool and nonchalant again? Nothing is helping me in getting over the crush.

[DryGermanGuy]

And you would want to get over him... because?

[Asker]

I'm afraid. I don't know if he likes me. Whenever I accidentally give away signs, he acts weird, like avoiding eye contact, fiddling with stuff, looking overtly serious or quiet. We sometimes call each other, talk important stuff for minutes and then stay there like that in silence for half an hour or so.

[Gobbyjobby52]

This will sound socially unacceptable to say as its advice i'd give to a male - have a goal as a man and work towards it and use this confidence to talk to the lady with less tension and fear (not saying it won't work for women) but it's more unconventional as men tend to be more goal orientated while women are more relational and nurturing orientated, but build a skill and use it as confidence leverage for yourself, confidence in yourself will elevate you inside and you won't project your feelings on to him as much.

You might also be idealising him a bit and a lot of people do before they know someone, so try reminding yourself he poops, complains, has flaws like shyness or bluntness or sloppiness or whatever there is, visualise it and acknowledge his limits to as it should help stabilise your view of him without outright killing attraction. Also do breathing exercises as you may be overheating inside, he'll notice and may comment on it, if he's rude then you know he's not for you but if he asks what's up that's when you and him can start a conversation. I hope this helps

[Anonymous]

U said u could marry him , but now u say u wanna get over him. What do u want exactly?

[Asker]

Girl, I'm afraid, I don't if he likes me but getting butterflies whenever I see him is a terrible experience. Being friends we talk for hours together while I kinda die from that feeling.

[Asker]

*I don't know

[Opinion Owner]

Wdym u don’t know. U aren’t sure , means u don’t want him

[Asker]

Lol no, I want him but I don't have the courage to confess. I don't know if he wants me too. In the second reply I just fixed the incomplete first sentence.

[Opinion Owner]

Oh what’s in him that u see a future or marriage with him?

[Asker]

He's very kind and empathetic. He's smart, and even a feminist. He respects people, is humble and very loyal to the people who he cherishes. He had been there for me on my bad times when everyone else left. Yet he never spoke about those things to people. I've known him in person for quite some time. That's a genuinely good man.

[Opinion Owner]

How do u both look? How did u meet?

[Asker]

He's quite good-looking I'd say, and people call me pretty everyday. I mean I've caught him staring at me when I'm not looking or getting kinda lost while I'm talking to him until something startles him, so I think he finds me pretty too. We're coworkers at a research lab, dating and marrying coworkers are common things here.

[Opinion Owner]

That’s great then. What are your race? Are both white?

[ABC1x1x]

You said "he's a feminist" he is gay. You have no chance.

[DishLady]

But that IS natural for a person when they like someone.

[BadGirlRebellious]

just be yourself and be confident. don't overthink "formulas" in how to talk to them. find good times to express interest subtly

[Adogdog]

May I ask your opinion on my profile picture?

[BadGirlRebellious]

Its cute

[Alex-Snow]

Just find common things to share or talk about. Go for long walks and smile and be interested in each others lives. Are you sexually involved with him?

[serious]

I have never had any crushes. Never faced this situation.

[queenofcardio]

It's so hard. At some point it will get easier

[blackeagle007]

Just act the same as you would with any one else. It’s easy.

[Asker]

I see nobody in the world the way I see him, I've already imagined my entire life with him.

[Anonymous]

Confess. It’s worth it if he likes you back.

[Anonymous]

I act very shyly and bashfully around the girl I like very much... I get kinda clumsier than usual.

[Twalli]

Candor will help. Tell him that you've started to fall for him.

[slatyb]

Why haven't you just asked him?

[Anonymous]

I act too normal due to anxiety.

[Asker]

I try to, but it doesn't work. He doesn't make eye contact with me once I start acting weird, so that helps a little.

[Opinion Owner]

You wouldn't want to act like me. I basically play dead.

[Anonymous]

Crushes are for children.

[Asker]

There's a song in my language, that says "Heart is forever young, forever immature". It is about someone older getting surprised by the fact that they're still capable of developing a crush and catching feelings. I have had only 3 crushes in my entire life and he's the strongest one of them I think.

[beefcakebradybatson]

Remember they may not be into you.

[robocop666]

if they like you they will not care

[Seabreeze0]

Normal I’m dating her.