Why do some girls feel the need to be validated by men?

[Xseed]

My former friends with benefits would always feel like she needs to make a guy she's met like her. Its weird because I was also one of those men she needed to validate, and the reason it didn't work out with her was because she would constantly seek validation from men she's met at parties and such. This completely turns me off. Actually I am sure that the reason we ended the relation was because she felt that I had validated her and that she didn't need acceptance from me anymore. That i was 'conquered.' We're not together anymore but I still wonder why she does this and why she can't seem to settle for one guy and have it be enough, instead she wastes her time flirting with random men she meets, hooking up with them, get their validation, and move on. I always wondered if she would eventually mature and find that she doesn't need to do this and this life style is very negative for her. Would she? also, she's just recently turned 21

[aamy811]

Honestly everyone seeks validation one way or another. In her case she wants to be wanted more than she wants. I know tons of girls like this one of them was a girl that used to be really big and could never get a boyfriend and once she lost weight and started to get attention she craved it. It's like she always felt kinda empty and she tried to prove to herself that she was lovable with every partner. And when she still didn't love herself she moved on. It's a sad existence. But I think she mainly needs to like herself before she can let someone else like her. So maybe with enough time she would figure it out

[Estelita]

Omg thank you. Finally someone whi sees eye to eye! Low self esteem and lack of confidence. The more praise and acceptance she gets from men the better she feels about herself. Hard to build up easy to knock down. She must learn first to lover herself then she will no longer need validation from men.

[Xseed]

That sounds about right. but how can she love herself?

[Estelita]

She can start by praising herself for efforts rather than accomplishments. Inspirational quotes here and there. Accepting herself as beautiful even all her flaws. Don't compare be herself to others. Focus on her happiness. Treat herself as she does those who she loves and cares for dearly. She should stop going to parties and instead do something that is better worth her time. She should be proud of who she is whether she is dolled up or all natural. She should realize that to some she may never be good enough, but at the end of the day it doesn't matter because she is and always be great.

[Anonymous]

Not validation. More like social acceptance.

I think she'll grow out of it once she realizes it's not creating lasting relationships. If she doesn't, then maybe it's the way she prefers it.

[Xseed]

but why would she prefer it? we were quite happy together, 4 months. we were pretty much boyfriend and girlfriend, aside form the title itself. But she found this guy one time and made out with him, while i was in the same house. She came back to me crying she was sorry, but I felt that it would happen again so kept her as strictly fwb.

[Opinion Owner]

She wasn't ready for the commitment.

[aficionado]

Every person, at some point in his/her life, feels the need to be validated by someone of the opposite gender. No specific reason for that, its just human tendency.