We need each other in this world.
I know there are toxic individuals but if you don't want men to judge all women by the evil that some women do... stop judging all men by the evil that some men do.
Without women we would not have life.
Without men you would not have a place to live or roads to travel on or electricity or airplanes or cars or trains or bridges or the internet or telephones or rocket ships or satellites...
This world is screwed.
It's full of bad things and bad people.
Finding a positive way to work together and move forward is key. Being petty and simpleminded and arrogant and insulting is not a solution.
One contributes to the chaos and conflict. Or... one contributes to finding harmony in whatever way we can. We need the best of you. You need the best of us. There is bad on both sides. Don't focus and elevate the bad. Elevate the good.
Bring attention to the bad to the ones who can deal with it, like the police...
I might have gone off track but I wrote so much with one finger on my phone... I'm not going to erase it.
When they are mentally healthy and not addicted to attention like many women on the internet today, both men and women don't constantly care about an entire gender's approval.
But does that mean they don't care about other people's approval in general and don't need attention? No, that's absurd.
We need a healthy dose of attention, and as social animals we have to be approved by members of a group, any group, to be considered a part of them. Otherwise we will be excluded from every community. And no, we can't live by ourselves in separate caves.
Living in any society needs a certain level of approval. You went to school partly to internalize values as a means of informal social control. You also have to be approved by the police when you go out, otherwise you will be 'formally contolled' by force and excluded from society.
But I understand the approval you were talking about was about more personal behaviours or just physical attractiveness. In that case, the number of people who need to approve you is much lower, maybe it would only be one; Your lover. But it will never be "zero" even for those very personal behaviours, unless you decide to live alone with your cats.
Buttom line: Nobody thinks you "care" about their approval, but if you want to be a part of any community you need its members' approval. The smallest group has two members.
I agree, it’s stupid. I remember when a guy tried to pull that on one of my bedties by calling her fat and I cussed his ass out. He had no business talking about weight when he’s as thin as a piece of paper :/ . It’s definitely cause of a inflated ego, when I popped off on him his ass had nothing to say. Same probably goes for the rest of them
Men care about what women think. Women care about what men think. If you didn't, that would make you a pretty shitty person to be around right? And a terrible partner.
If you only cared about your own problems, your own self worth, your own life, no one elses... Why would anyone want to be with you?
But guess what... you don't have to do any of that. You can continue to just care about yourself and be alone. If you are happy this way. That is your choice. You don't have to deal with these hugely inflated egos. And just deal with your own. Which if you think about that long enough, you should see the issue. And double standard you are presenting.
Do you think a man should care about what you want from him? Have you dated someone that didn't give a shit about you or your feelings? How was that experience? If it was bad, then you are dumb for thinking it doesn't matter. If you haven't then you really have no room to talk.
You don't have to care about men's approval, but then you can't really complain if no one wants to date you seriously as a result.
Opinion
73Opinion
Because every single woman cares about the approval of others and cares about what men think. If they didn't their would be no instagram models, no makeup, no skin and cleevege pics in women's profiles, women on youtube would square the camera to their face like men do instead of making sure their cleavege is shown at all times, they wouldn't do pretty much every single thing that women do basically.
The idea that you don't care is as idiotically stupid and laughable as if you where to claim that the earth is flat, you can say it, but not a single person, yourself included, believes it.
On a low level this post is seeking approval.
Merely taking time to say, "I don't care what anyone thinks" is displaying the opposite. Because if you didn't care to shape others opinions, then you would say nothing and just do what you want.
That's if you REALLY didn't care. You actually do care about approval. You didn't get it from them so you're looking here to get some. And I'm not even shitting on you for it. We all want approval from someone.
I'm just saying it's a good idea to be honest with yourself about what you want in life. Now to the question. Why do guys say things like that? It can vary. Depends on what you said and how you were acting.
May have been to get you to shut up. May have just been a genuine thought of "my god... who would want to be around that". I've been around people acting shitty and thought to myself why do they choose to be that way. Could be something like that
You say that cause your 16 and a woman. I assume your good looking. When you want to feel like people care you post a pic online or talk to family and friends or anyone and they will compliment you or say you got this. As a man I silently struggle with life keeping my lights on and my life together. I have nobody to talk to. When I post a selfie or an update on Facebook I get 1 like. When I struggle nobody stops to compliment or help me.
I know what it’s like to be alone and unloved. Now imagine that when your older. Your never going to be as sought after or considered as important as your early years. Eventually you’ll lose that following on Facebook less people will care about you and as peoples problems grow yours will seem less significant. So maybe you don’t want a husband or kids… but you’ll eventually suffer for that choice sorry.
Because when a woman is really committed to a guy or wants him bad enough she values his opinion. A lot of women are incapable of being loyal/committed so they think the world revolves around them. These women aren’t relationship material but they have some foolish (thirsty) guys convinced otherwise. So one day when you want a man of value you will find that he has lots of options & self-control. You will be jumping through hoops for him... not him jumping through hoops for you which is what you’re used to seeing.
Well a lot of people are still raised being told their behaviours aren't ladylike or gentlemanly. It's honestly probably hardwired into our brains at this point. Growing us being told by our parents that we should clean our rooms cause no girl wants a slob, or not to laugh about burping because it's not attractive, do something with our lives cause girls want a rich guy they can depend on, etc. These are things that are still told to kids, no matter how true they may be, parents still use the threat of being alone as leverage to mold their child into a "model citizen" that behaves properly in order to find a mate, and yeah some guys grow up not hearing that or not living by that, other guys do hear and act on those words and it's still so widely used that it could be wired into our brains to see a person doing something unattractive to us for our immediate thought to be "well they won't get married doing that" because it doesn't appeal to us specifically, but does to others.
Well, because for generations, that's the way it was.
The late beautiful actress Arlene Dahl wrote a book about it in the 1965 book (before 1970s feminist movement...)
"Always Ask a Man: The Key to Femininity"
"Don't do that or men won't marry you." It's true honey.
Don't have double standards at all. Men don't like women with double standards.
Don't pretend to be something you aren't. Men find that REPULSIVE.
Don't act like men are the bad guys while thinking you're so innocent. Don't need to say more there.
Don't get mad at men when they call you out for being stupid.
Don't turn down a man then pursue him when you see him with something nice. That says you're a gold digger.
Don't try to separate him from his friends. Especially if you have your own friends.
Don't claim men can't hit women if you're totally okay with slapping men for simply saying or doing somethong you simply found stupid. Makes you no better than a woman beater.
Don't turn men's struggles into women's struggles. Yes... Women do that... And we fucking hate it.
And for fucks sake... Don't. Share. His. Secrets.
Need I say more, sweetheart?
It’s just how life is I mean really the same goes for men. If you act certain ways or do stupid nonsense then most women of caliber aren’t wanting to mess with you and it’s the same for women. If you act a certain way it’s going to be less desirable for the men that will treat you right and be able to carry their end. Ultimately you’re right also because there’s always exceptions to the rule plus you might not even be into men but I’d imagine it would go the same for women liking women and men liking men. Regardless of all that there’s someone for everyone it’s just easier with a bigger net
Money - guy should be legally able to provide for her expenses Power (Blue collar jobs) = masculine guy with a job.. Fame= guy should have social status and better if he is famous.. Music = Girls want guys to have same taste in music.. Kids = Guy should be good with kids... and be able to handle and understand them.. Pets = If a guys is good with pets it's shows a fatherly nature and girls like that. . Respect = Guy should be respected socially and guy should respect the girl in public.. Like a queen.. However roughen her in bed like a whore in private.. Friendship among men = Girls want a guy who have a lot of guy friends and she want that strong friendship that guys have between each other The BRO-MODE... Because girls don't really have this Sister-mode girls really want good friends...
It the exact same reason us men would care about women opinion about us, if you are a hetrosexual women or a bisexual women you would logically want to get the attention of a men so of course you try seeking men approval.
If women really didn't care about guys opinions than why do women constantly wear some of the most revealing clothing that logically wouldn't function as clothing. Women be the one trying to wear make up, plus when it comes to either gender women are more likely to send pictures of themselves in practically nothing compared to men.
Girls do care. Maybe not about every man's approval (except for all those "how do I look" posts).
I love when my husband compliments me on anything from my outfit or hair to my cooking, parenting, or even my ability to help him stay organized.
He also seeks my approval for things like what he should wear to a wedding or dinner party, house and yard aesthetics, and even his body (he asked me the other day if I think he has a gut).
The gender that uses selfies, push-up bras, makeup, high heels, and lingerie DOESN'T care about attention. Yeah, okay... You're 16 and saying this because you haven't hit the wall yet. Come back in your late 20s and see how you think about men ignoring you.
"Don't act like that or no man will marry you" When people say this it just means that you're doing something not feminine (obviously "feminine" depends on ur culture or where ur from) it doesn't mean that they're telling you that you want the approval of men.
Also you'd be surprised how many guys today have accepted that girls don't want their approvals so when guys they say stuff like that it's usually not because they have a big ego but it's because thats how they were brought up to be or how they've grown to perceive what a woman should be like.
We're Humans, It all comes down to the individual so yeah we should stop dividing all Men and all Women;
accept that we have our own problems and practice empathizing with each other.
well humans are social animals and if you can't keep your behavior positive in the eyes of others they will reject you.
male opinions of you matter. you will care about them soon. right now you're 16 and studies show male opinions of women's body peak at 16 so you're desirable right now inherently
BUUUUT as you get older and your natural features can't attract men on your own... you will need to attract them with PERSONALITY. so its good to practice now before you pick up habits you regret
I don't think that, I don't care about the attractiveness of random women or men. What I actually care about, is their usefulness, their willingness to follow instructions and what they can contribute to my work and overall goals.
Plus, I usually have more pressing matters to think about - for example voters' approval. That's what really concerns me - that the population thinks good enough of me to vote - it's also true that the other candidate was put there to not have a one-man election, but I still have to put in effort and on that front I think that other people's approval - of my appearance and thought is really important.
You're not going to like my answer on this... Women do care about the opinions of guys... At least straight women do... And it's not that they care about the opinion of all guys, because they don't. It's that they care about the opinions of the guys they are attracted to or are interested in on some level.
Notice how I said not all guys? Remember that..
It's just the same as men. When growing up I didn't care what most women thought of me. All I cared about was the ones that I liked.. So I tried to impress them..
Someone saying you will never find a husband acting like that though is just old fashioned.. And using a mentality from back when women had to find a good man because she had no options. Which is not the case any more.
That's BS !! I don't care , and known for decades that women primarily seek the validation of other women , not men. I get the impression you despise men. I never give or seek approval / compliments , I DGAF & mind my own business. The only human female I truly care about is my daughter.
s Oh gosh. If that's all it took to keep guys from noticing me I would have saved so much time in my dm's.
Truth is both sides have people desperate for attention but the self deluded men and women in here who think that every woman cares about what men think of her need to have themselves checked.
Actually I don't think that at all? Especially in this feminism age. If anything my mindset now with girls is, don't bother talking to her because she's probably going to go bonkers on me. I'd rather put on my wireless Apple ear buds and play basketball.
Because they've been raised to think this, whether by parents or media.
Or because they can't wrap their heads around the fact that their general approval doesn't matter to most women, but their egos make them think it should.
You can also add your opinion below!
