One night stand pregnant won't have abortion?

[Anonymous]

Hello,
Basically I had a one night stand with some girl I met down the pub. She told me she was on the pil and We both agreed before and after she would get the morning after pill for precautions, when I messaged her asking if she got the pill she replied 'no your going to be a dad... hahaha' I am 21 single and she is 29 and divorced with 2 children with 2 different men. I don't want to be another one of those men, iv asked her plenty of times to speak to me seriously and it just seems like she finds the whole situation hilarious and I don't see the funny side to it? Do I have any rights? Can I withdraw my rights as a father as bad as it sounds I don't want this child I'd prefer to have a child with the one I love? It's not fair on the baby as much as it's not fair on me... Please help me I'm in a sticky situation

[emilyg25]

#1: Why would you wait so long to ask her if she got the pill. If you waited until she knew she was pregnant the pill would have done no good. It's called the morning after pill for a reason. If you did text her with in the first couple of days and she said she's pregnant, she's lying and could not be.
#2: Is the baby yours? Ask about other partners. Already sounds like she's a little busy, and I really wouldn't trust her to tell the truth anyway by the way you made her sound. If she does have the baby, get a paternity test before you decide anything
#3: If the baby is yours, I literally have no idea about this stuff, but: You can't make her have an abortion, but there are other options. She could give it up for adoption, or like you said, you could give up all rights and sign the baby over to her. Just remember that that means that you have a child out there somewhere that you will have no say or rights to.
Best case scenario hope she has a miscarriage? Sorry, that was in poor taste.

[Asker]

I asked her the day after and she said she would go Monday then I asked her again on ththe tueTuesday to get that reply

[emilyg25]

When did you have sex? Because it sounds like she would have NO idea if she was pregnant yet. Don't freak out quite yet.

[Asker]

9 days ago, I have no idea about any of this stuff as I've never been through it I'm just taking her word she said she has a scan on Thursday

[emilyg25]

Good God no. She wouldn't be having a ultrasound already. Not until about 18-20 weeks. And I don't think even a pregnancy could pick up if she was pregnant or not. And I forgot to mention in my original opinion, you'll be lucky if you don't end up with an STD. BC or not, it doesn't protect against them. Use a condom

[emilyg25]

*pregnancy test

[Anonymous]

Shame on the girl, but also shame on you. All I hear is "me, me, me". It's your fault if you didn't use a condom and your fault that you trusted someone that you didn't even know. As much unfair to you as it is the baby? Except the baby will grow up without a father, which has shown to have significant harm to their psyche, something they can't help. Whereas you simply are taking responsibility for your mistake, something you could have helped, but did not. You're not a child anymore. It's time to grow up and be a man and take responsibility instead of making excuses.

[Asker]

That's why I'm saying I don't want it, If it was a complete accident then fair enough but she lied to me. I wasn't going to do it, and as you say about a child growing up without a father that's why I don't want it because she's lured me into this at no fault of my own basically

[Starsite]

Agreed

[Opinion Owner]

Whatever helps you sleep at night. It's too bad there actually are people like this that exist.

[Asker]

Agree with me or the answer?

[xPoison]

@Asker Just no. She is guilty just as much as you. Why the hell will you trust a COMPLETE STRANGER words? You just take anyone words? .. please!

[Dakota_The_Rota]

Sorry, but wouldn't that be a reason why abortion shouldn't be allowed either? It was just a mistake on the woman's so she can have an abortion, but when it's a man he has to live with the consequences? That's not fair or equal.

[cbb03]

By the way she reacted she's either lying to you or set you up to knock her up. You wouldn't know for a couple weeks if you got pregnant so if she said something the day after she could be lying. Ask for a paternity test and it is possible to have your rights terminated, she'd have to prove it's yours her word isn't good enough for her to get your child support. Ps. next time be more careful either pull out on time or bring your own condoms some chicks are crazy and poke holes in them and birth control isn't 100% certain.

[Proboy421]

What were you thinking? You need to listen to Tom Leykis and watch his videos. He has tips for situations like these and he is funny. Red flags everywhere. We consider this situation as the woman trapping you. She was divorced and a single mother with two kids that aren't yours. Why on earth would you want to raise someone else's seed. In a few states judges are forcing men to pay child support to single mothers because the child considers the guy to be the father. Typically when a girl says they are on the pill, don't trust them and use a condom. They (especially Single American moms) trap guys and then divorce and you end up paying half and child support and alimony. Your trapped and the only thing you can do is hope she takes the pill.

Listen to this and it should help

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sESMzXEPSps

[Zerodown]

This is why p*rn >Real life.

It's all fun and games until some chick gets pregnant.

[Asker]

I completely agree with that mate

[SleepingTurtle]

Why is it not fair on you? Wasn't it your penis inside her? Or was it another guy's?

[Asker]

Because she's lied to me. I wasn't going to do it but she promised she was on contraception and agreed for the morning after pill as far as I'm concerned I was safe...

[SleepingTurtle]

Even with contraception and the morning after pill, there is still a chance of pregnancy. If you can't handle the responsibilities that might come with sex, you shouldn't be having sex. You went and had sex anyway. So seems pretty fair.

[TonyRyan]

Seems like she's messing with you and not pregnant, to me at least.

[Asker]

My best mate said that after reading the Facebook messages

[mutedaisy]

Take her out for smoothies. Crush up the pill and put it in her smoothie. Or, do you know anyone that works in fast food, take her their and have them spike her drink with a couple of pills. last option, chew up the pill and with a little bit at a tine and kiss her feeding her small amounts. If it's not too late.

[Asker]

I'm sure I could get arrested for that lol?

[Megalodon]

This may be a viable option.

[mutedaisy]

Nope, she won't die. Just don't get caught._. Other options are also available, but they are highly illegal and could cost you a couple of thosands :/

[Starsite]

That's a crime, and very bad advice.

[mutedaisy]

No, it's not. No one is being poisoned.

[Debbiexoxo]

Are you serious, don't do that.

[mutedaisy]

Yep dead serious.

[Red_Arrow]

Feeding someone drugs without t, not to mention it has been days and it is a morning after pill. heir knowledge is definitely illegal

[LunaMay]

You sound like a wonderful person

[Awsdrd1990]

the BABY is being poisoned ... omg... lol *shakes head*

[mutedaisy]

You do realize, there is no baby... I wonder if you people even know how anatomy works.

[MysteriousFlower]

It takes two to tango, so its 50% your fault. You trust a stranger to be reliable? Besides, if this was straight after you messaged her that is impossible, unless she was already pregnant to begin with, which also sounds unlikely. Chances are she is 'joking' and she keeps being a bitch about it so its just a lie, if she does become pregnant from the night stand you will just have to face the consequences, unless your a typical bastard.

[BassistForever]

Agreed. You can't trust strangers. :3

And she actually might be joking. I once told a particularly terrible ex that I gave him chlamydia (even though I didn't) He believed me. Because he was a scum bag. (not that you're a scumbag OP... you're just a little empty-headed for trusting that chick)

[Starsite]

Unfortunatly when you choose to have sex with someone you don't know you open yourself up to situations like this. You don't have a right to make her abort a child. You can however ask for a paternity test to make sure the baby is yours. If she does have the baby I hope you not only support that child but be involved with him/her as well. The baby is the innocent victim in this senerio so whatever the outcome don't make him/her pay for your guys mistake.

[LittleSally]

Ummm... if you think you can have sex with different women all the time and expect not to suffer any consequences you are, obviously, sorely mistaken.
Welcome to the real world, pal.
It's expensive (in more ways than one) and definitely not a walk in the park.

[Nuns_in_Heat]

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,,,,,,,,,

[bombamboum]

I'm sorry to tell you but there's nothing you could do. You should have use a condom in the first place. Trusting someone you just met at a bad on birth control or stds was not smart no matter how okay it deemed at the time.

[Asker]

I make stupid decisions when I drink, like many others

[bombamboum]

It's true and now you have to live with the consequences.
Your situation is even more complicated because that woman might just have been looking for a sperm donor. She already has two babies from different dad. She lied about being on birth control so it's pretty sure she just wanted to get pregnant from you. If that's the case, there is no way she'll abort.

[lightingrod]

Never trust a girl you meet at pub, idc if she claim she on the pill, always have them condoms with you when you go out just incase and you should of pullout when you felt you was about to cum so you wouldn't have to worry about getting her pregnant.

[Anonymous]

Is she really pregnant? You said you called her the next day and she said you were going to be a dad? Thats rubbish, she would only be able to know after 3 weeks? So if she really is pregnant get a DNA test quickly because it's not yours

[Anonymous]

Do I have any rights?

No, as a man you have ZERO rights under the law. Where are the fucking feminists "fighting for men's rights" in situations like this? Equality my ASS. Feminists are fucking liars.

Sorry this is happening to you brother. Best of luck to you.

[Eugene]

What to do? Well, depends on a country you live in.
If you're in USA/EU that's plagued by feminism, you better pack your stuff and move away where she cannot reach you.

See you in Russia/China.

PS: Not kidding, man.

[Anonymous]

This is why you need to always use a condom, ESPECIALLY with one night stands... Dude, even if she told you she was on the pill, were you not worried about STDs?

There is a problem with sex ed :/

[britwood879]

I doubt she's pregnant but the bigger issue here is STDs!!!

[LovelySerene]

If you aren't prepared for the risks, then you shouldn't be having sex at all... The pill is not 100%, it's just as much your fault as it is hers.

[John_Doesnt]

Get real close to her like you want to be there for her. Then bring her "breakfast in bed" but lace the orange juice and scrambled eggs with morning after pills.
Find a sneaky way to get that gross thing out of her.

[Maxemeister]

We cannot help you from the other side of the internet, but you have an option. She should've taken those god damned pills. If she won't have an abortion, you have the right to cut that out of your life.

[Asker]

Right to cut it out of my life? What do you mean by that

[Maxemeister]

Well, you're not ready to be a father. You can temporarily cut that part out.

[DaGenius]

Take care of your responsibility now. You man enough to lay down with this woman. You man enough to take care of your kid. Welcome to hell, a. k. a. reality my friend. It's not burger king, can't have it your way all the time.

[RationalMale]

Assuming she's not jesting, then calm. Down. Someone like that sleeps with a lot of men. Cut your contact way down, do not acknowledge the child as yours, do not sign any birth certificate, demand a paternity test.

[front2back]

This is one of the many reasons I won't partake in casual sex.
I don't trust a stranger to not do shit like this.