Men are always called shallow first, yet I would argue women are more shallow then men. Why are women so picky when it comes to choosing a mate?

[mikedavis33b]

Women always accuse men of being shallow, but I would argue that women are more shallow than men. Women are very picky when it comes to a man's appearance. Yet when a few months later they break up bc they don't get along. Women just seem to have no clue sometimes, its like everyone is telling her not to date that guy, but she can't seem to resist, why? Bc the guy looks good, says the right things, then when the guy moves on she can't understand what went wrong. Why do women choose a guy based upon only his looks and the things they say instead of taking in all the variables. Why do women get sucked into these circumstances? Are they really that gullible? Why can't the see that the perfect guy isn't always the best looking guy, or athletic or etc, but the guy who is just a common looking guy? Its like women want the guy to be perfect in everything b4 they will even date him. Thus is the reason I would say more women are shallower than men. Bc they expect the guy to be perfect and it just isn't practical. So why do women go after guys that isn't practical are they really that dumb? Or do they know it is wrong? Why can't a girl realize when a guy is good for her and when he isn't? Regardless of looks? Why don't women look past a man's looks and see what's inside, instead of judging him based upon his looks? Plus another example is when a guy is on tour (military) and he comes back maimed and dismember only for the girl to leave him when he did nothing wrong. Yet she can't stay based upon his looks, isn't that being shallow?

Updates

+1 y

Actually tbh this was just a thought provoking question, with observations of my friends and of my own personal adventures, this stuff really hasn't happened to me. It was just observations that I see from time to time in the opposite sex. I would say that I am a people watcher per se, I just like to observe and study people in a sense.

I do like how some people (not all) automatically jump to the conclusion that some girl dumped me or some girl did something to me to write the thought...

Updates

+1 y

provoking question, but its all good, I just wish more people would think out of the box, instead of trying to put everything and everyone in this tiny little box. Boxes shouldn't exist at all, there should be no boundaries and no limits to what a person can or is willing to achieve. So I think we all ought to be a little open minded and not put so many others in your box. Thanks for participating and have a good day!

[XRabbitHeartX]

What's wrong with being picky? I know if I like a guy or not. And yes, unfortunately most guys i won't like in *that* way because that's how love works. If it was then how come there can be so many people but yet only one or two gives you goosebumps, makes you get butterflies and hits you right between the eyes. I can tell you why because of chemistry, attraction and lots of other fuzzy things that can't be explained. I know if I get those yummy feelings over a guy and I refuse to go for a guy who I don't feel as passionate about because I'd be wasting not only my time but his time too. We don't choose who we fall in love with. It's as simple as that.

As for looks, oh please tell me how many guys will date a girl they feel no attraction towards.

[mikedavis33b]

I've dated a girl who wasn't as attractive as other girls I could of dated. Why? Because we had more in common. We liked a lot of the same things and we got along really well together. So yes sometimes it does happen

[XRabbitHeartX]

So are you still with her?
I'm pretty sure you were still at least somewhat attracted to her.

[mikedavis33b]

No she ended up cheating on me! That was about 3 years ago, but I still remember it. Yea I was attracted to her can't say that I wasn't but girls always seem to go after a guy who promises them the moon, but all that guy is doing blowing smoke up her butt, bc he just wanted to sleep with her. Which bring me to this point is why girls allow or subject themselves to these kind of guys?

[XRabbitHeartX]

But thing is, picture you're madly in love with a girl and she also tells you cute stuff... why on earth would you doubt it? In the moment you're in too in love and let's face it, we all go into things with good intentions hoping it will be good. Majority of times we didn't know the guy or girl would hurt us. I can tell you that all the times i've had my heart broken Ididn't see it coming for second. In fact fun fact , all the asshole guys in my life were "nice" guys to me. I didn't know they were assholes. They all appeared as the nice guy who wouldn't break my heart. They all said they are different and would come across as that.

[Ghibli]

If men aren't allowed to be picky towards women but women can that to men, then that's a double standard

[XRabbitHeartX]

@Ghibli nobody said guys can't be picky...

[Somechick119]

You can't compare between who's shallower than the other one. Not every girl is like that but as much as girls are shallow guys are too; in my country literally no guy would want to date a girl if she hasn't got the perfect body, face Personalty or whatsoever! Isn't that just shallow? For example in clubs, if a hot girl walked in with her ugly friend would guys go for the ugly one? Obviously not. Girls keep going for wrong men because they're usually fragile and they fall into their charms but at least they sob about it when it's all over, but if a guy got heartbroken he would change who he is and turn into a player sleeping with every walking girl; what I am trying to say You just can't say girls are shallower than guys nor the other way.

[mikedavis33b]

Yeah I get what you are saying, but girls should be more open minded as well as men. But girls always seem to want the perfect guy and they are unrealistic. Girls seem to want to live in fantasy land instead of living in reality in my opinion.

[Somechick119]

Darling even if girls actually lived in a fantasy that won't last until their first heart break or maybe the second until they realize that this is wrong and they should be more realistic.

[Bethany-Louise]

SOME women are shallow, absolutely. Probably quite a lot, but don't generalise us, we aren't all like that. :)

When we fall for someone, we fall hard. It isn't about us falling for their appearance, we fall for their charm. Guys are VERY good at telling girls what they want too hear.

[mikedavis33b]

Oh I realize that all women aren’t all this way, but they seem to let the guy suck them in, I’ve seen it done and done again, especially when she knows that a good guy likes her and yet she still chooses the guy who charms her or looks better to her, when in reality the woman would probably be better off if she dated the good guy. Wouldn’t you think?

[Bethany-Louise]

Course :)!
But unfortunately all rational thinking goes out the window when there's romance involved haha.

[Dewreck21]

Dude I agree to an extent. I don't like to brag but I've been called cute/hot by women of all ages. And I have a great sensitive genuine caring personality. It's not as easy as it seems. I have a dating profile and a girl said I looked cute but she wouldn't date me because I don't dress like an adult.. 5 pics of me. And 2 of them in ️Skating so I'm in my skateboard attire. Kinda sad how some women are like that. They seem to be more visual then they say they're. But in reality it goes to their past expierences. Being good looking really doesn't mean anything. They want confidence, charm and ambition

[bluenose1872]

You see in others what's in yourself. My ex used to call me a control freak when I wasn't. She was the one trying to control me. Tried to get me to dress the way she wanted and everything. Guess she got tired of me telling her to fuck off

[TheDevilInside]

Oh look! Another rant from a bitter misogynist! Ever thought about your choice of girls? Ever question your taste in girls? Don't fucking blame the entire gender if the girls you're liked are all bitches. Blame your self. The Problem is inside you. Not the entire half the world population.

[Anonymous]

Looks/attraction is a continuum. It doesn't have to be a 10, but there needs to be some spark. If guys cared that much about purely emotional connection, you wouldn't hear the dumb phrase "friend zone" existing. Lots of average guys get girlfriends, though. But usually when guys make complaints like this, he wants a super gorgeous woman to desire him "just because."

[mikedavis33b]

okay... But nope I don't want a 10 bc those girls are usually too stuck up, if you ask me and their expectations of a their guy that they want to date are astronomical! Thus they are out there in dreamland imo!

[Opinion Owner]

A few, but not many. Otherwise there wouldn't be so many couples. Go to wal mart on a Sat evening if ya think all couples are pretty. :P

[Zerodown]

Women are more picky because they want the best genes for their baby and security. We men are less picky because we just shoot the sperm into the vagina. We men don't need any support and don't desire a provider.

[Lionseye]

yeah true the woman has more to lose

[Balcazaurus]

Instinct. In the end, it's the girl that ultimately says yes or no to the courting.

We're just picky by nature.

[Anonymous]

Didn't read the rant but... women must be very careful when choosing a guy. This is nature. Women have to choose the best DNA out there.

[Anonymous]

And another girl left you and chosen a showcase guy instead of you.

[dwiller943]

Picky and shallow are 2 different things.

[Anonymous]

Women don't know what they want