My wife has wandering eyes?

[Anonymous]

It's been two years since our marriage, we both love each other so much but one thing that upset me is her wandering eyes, she looks at other guys when first time i noticed i got upset and talked to her about this she said so what if i looked i can't close my eyes, it's just accidental, then again i noticed her checking guys i was mad at her i said if you don't like me why did you marry me she started crying, she loves me can't even think about cheating, I have talked to her about this dozens of times every time she starts crying now when i m around her she tries to not check guys but still i catch her doing this, she is not cheating with me thats for sure, what shoulf i do this habbit of her killing me from inside.

[8dragons8]

Sex drive is not something that can be controlled. Therefore, looking at members of the opposite sex that you find sexually attractive, intentionally and unintentionally, is common, regardless of your thoughts or feelings toward said person. As long as your wife is only looking, everything should be fine. If it really bothers you, or you feel that she is doing it too much, try to talk with her, and see if the two of you can agree on what a reasonable amount of "checking out" is.

[Asker]

I talked to her at least a dozen time, now whenever I bring this issue she starts crying she says you don't trust me you doubt me, of course I trust her but it's embarrassing for me her checking guys in front of me I live in small town and she definitely would be aggressive behind my back that's really embarrassing for me.

[jimmijo1954]

You should seek counseling about how to control your jealousy that’s all it is is it emotional issue inside of you don’t ruin your marriage when it’s you that needs counseling

[Asker]

So you think her wandering eyes are normal and I m making issue out of nothing, I m jealous guy yes I m, what if she also gets response from the guy she checks, that's where the problem will start.

[jimmijo1954]

If that happens then I think you should just consider the possibility that maybe the two of you are meant for each other

[lilaqua]

When I first read this I thought “oh a lazy eye, clearly you haven’t been observant” so that was funny. Now I think as a partnership you should establish certain rules that work for both your comfort levels. Personally I see nothing wrong unless the other person is actually cheating, but again it’s up to you.

[Asker]

I told her couple of times that I don't like her looking at every guy, only one thing I can do is sit with her and talk to her about the issue and she takes it serious but same situation again happen after a month then we talk again now since yesterday I m on silent mode my mood is off and I don't know what to do because she is not learning I m also tired of discussing same issue with her again and again, now she says you don't trust me you doubt me whenever I bring this on table she starts crying, I don't want to make her cry.

[mmcountryman]

Are you cheating on her? A lot of times jealousy comes from guilt. Also, she’s married not dead. If she wants to check out guys let her! It’s not the end of the world.

[Asker]

I m not cheating her, her looking someone is normal but looking again n again to me is not normal, I have told her this at least a dozen time and somehow she would convince me there is nothing wrong and one time even she said you kill me if I ever cheat you.

[HamAndCheese]

I dunno... I look at the people around me pretty regularly. Don't mean nothing by it.

[jimmy2]

look she is who she is accept her

[Asker]

I try to ignore her, she really cares about me she is the perfect wife, I feel insulted when my wife checks other guys I feel like she is attracted to them, then my mind goes wild imagining she is sexually attracted to them, that's painful I can't work properly now I m upset since yesterday I didn't tell her about me being upset I just don't know how to react since I m tired of telling her about her wandering eyes.