A pick me girl is a stereotype of a girl/woman who puts obvious effort into seeking approval and attention from men.
They are classified as “cool girls” who are mean to other women, overly flirtatious, and boy crazy.
The term is similar to the “Not like other girls” trope that portrays women who go out of their way to distance themselves from other women in the hopes that men will find them attractive.
Pick me girls however can also be a termed used to suggest a girl or woman is after male attention based on traits and behaviors that may have nothing to do with men to begin with, leaning towards negative stereotypes that suggest she is a “bimbo” or “slut”
The terms been used around a year or so: and if you’re wondering;; yes pick me boys are a thing too.
I try to avoid judging people based on stereotypes and childish labels. Instead, I judge people individually and by certain aspects of their character, which could be positive, negative, or neutral. For instance, regarding you assessment of a "pick me girl," you mentioned that they put in obvious effort to seek male attention. I have no problem with women seeking male attention. Male attention is a great thing, as long as you're smart about choosing the male that you want to give attention to. I also have no problem with women being "overly flirtatious" and "boy crazy" because flirting can be fun and can increase your confidence level around guys and being "boy crazy" could prevent you from being lonely as long as you choose the right boy for you. However, I take issue with the aspect of being mean to other women. Simply because you want male attention doesn't mean you have to disrespect other women. I would recommend that such women change this aspect about themselves for the better. Also, if a girl believes that she isn't "slutty" or can attract men in other ways, that's not a bad thing as long she's not disrespectful about it.
If you don't want to shave then don't shave, if you don't want to workout then don't workout, if you don't want to wear a crop top then don't wear a crop top, if you don't want to wear makeup then don't wear it.
It's your life and your choices and none of these make you less better.
But if you shame women who do all these things then you are the desperate one.
I strongly believe, that the pick me girls are a result of misogynistic stereotypes, (like that women who wear very light makeup, or no makeup at all are better), and girls being shamed in general by society, for having more "nerdy hobbies" Such as reading, drawing etc.
Let's be real here, not being like the average woman is going to be a big plus to most men. The women men actually love and appreciate are the ones who understand them, who think and behave more like them and share common values with them, it's not the vapid, entitled, shallow creatures without meaningful life goals and interests outside of gossip, makeup and clothes that attract men, those are merely being tolerated for to their sexual value by men who are willing to settle for that little.
So, being unlike other women and not getting along with them is usually a good sign in a woman.
On the other hand... if you have to go out of your way to try and convince someone that you are special, you most likely aren't special. I'd wager that the majority of "pick me girls" are very much average women, forced to suck up to men out of insecurity and desperation. They don't actually possess these superior qualities that would put them apart from other women, they merely pretend they do.
I think the whole "pick me" bs is just something bitter feminists came up with to shame women who have more conservative values. Not saying some of them don't just do it for male attention, because some do, but there's always the implication that the only possible reason for a woman to have conservative values is solely for male attention--which just isn't true. They just can't conceive of the notion that some people genuinely hold different opinions than them.
Plus, even if she *is* just doing it for male attention, I'm *still* more likely to pick her than the angry ones screeching about how much they hate pick me's. Just sayin' ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.
True. I`m sick of some people immediately assuming that everything is being done for attention - either male or female. And the idea of being "different" to stand out is stupid. Everybody is technically different: no two people are going to be one and the same.
I know that trend from tiktok. I find it ok. BUT: IT ANNOYS ME SO MUCH!!! When someone asks me what's my height And i say: 1,56m (5'1") and everyone calls me pick me. Or when i say i am nervous infront of a guy they call me pick me. I find it ok. But many people don't understand the definition of pick me
So are they like a female version of a simp? I do generally like people who are unique and go against the norm but it has to be authentic. Otherwise it's kind of cringey.
Guys have been getting tired the fake made-up girls and girls are starting to see this as dating and "eligible guys" are declining. In response, these "me girls" are starting to tone down their act to appear as more wholesome and appealing "wife-like material." Problem is that a lot of guys aren't buying into this, either.
Seems about right. They seek attention and validation from men by adopting an image or genre like : Rock chick Goth Punk Adorkable Hipster Bisexual R&B Rebels Vegans SJWs Preps Reggae Vampires Bisexual
There are so many but in seeking an identity to fit in and stand out as an individual the become uniformity itself. Usually they drop this as they grow up. Pick me girls is a good term. I wouldn't know what it is currently
There’s nothing wrong with being any of those things; I myself identify with one or more of those terms.
The whole point of the pick me girl is that she brings other girls down in order to make herself look better in the eyes of males where as theirs nothing wrong with individuality?
Trying to make yourself look like everyone else? I rarely see any goths/emos/alts anywhere and they just want to express themselves a certain way and theirs nothing wrong with that. They all have a certain type of style and EVERYBODY does. We’re humans and that’s what happens?
@NathanDavis which group are you even talking about?
A pick me isn't a cool girl. A pick me is just a girl who is hell bent on making it known that she's "not like other girls" and she's "unique" and "quirky' for the sake of getting attention from men.
I don't like anyone that can't be themselves and only does things for validation. So yeah, I don't like pick me's.
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
Seen quite a few in gag. But i think men give both the 2 sections equal attention. They say they like "pick me girls " but they will always have an attraction to the promiscuous ones too. Tbh i don't think men can differentiate tje BS both of the sections are trying to do just like how us women may fall easily for a guy saying" I am not like other men" yk
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Anonymous
(30-35)
1 y
i think they have a mental illness. i know a friend that changes constantly to whatever the guy she's dating likes. i can't believe she actually used to like football because the guy she was dating did. she even wore the jerseys! why didn't she like football when her dad did and she could have watched the games with him? because she's not there to impress her dad... and now with this guy, she's into anime and figurines. i just... i can't. I don't know if she even knows who she is!
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1 Reply
Opinion Owner
1 y
i think these girls are just soooo afraid of being alone they will do literally anything...
I hear about it and believe they exist but in real life never interacted with them much, since they spend all their time orbiting super in demand players.
In all honestly, both genders do this to a degree, because it's natural to make yourself seem more attractive in order to find a mate. Some women (and men) go over the top tho.
That’s not the point, and pick me girls don’t strive to put other girls down in order to make themselves look better to males. That’s why they’ll say stuff like
I don’t wear that much makeup up, I only put eyeliner and lipstick on”aka” I don’t wear makeup, I’m so quirky and not like other girls, you should pick me because of that
Or “I don’t hang out with other girls, they’re so toxic”
Yes but do I go telling other girls “oh my goodness you’re so fake, look how much makeup you put on and I don’t put on the much?” Aka pick me choose me behavior.
It isn’t natural, it’s because they aren’t secure themselves so they have to put others down.
Pick me girls are misognysts just because they want to be like the boys and don't want to be like the other girls. They act 'cute' for example: oH mY gOd JoShuA LeAvE mE aLoNe They like to be annoyed by the boys and act like they are annoyed but in real they are happy. These were some examples (sorry if i explained it wrong)
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