Why she always ask me to come her city?

[Anonymous]

Why she always ask me to come to her city Why do not she never come to me? Is there a social reason for that?

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

This question is lacking a lot of context… Who is this woman to you? Is she someone you are talking to online, as a romantic interest/potential girlfriend?

Either way, if she has never met you in person, I know that a lot of women in the online dating world might feel a little uneasy or uncomfortable going to a new city to meet someone they have never met.

Here's the thing, if a woman has never met the guy in person, she has no idea who he actually is… What if he's a murderer or a rapist? Why would you go to a city you’ve never been to, have no place to stay, and probably have bought tickets/booked a spot for certain dates…? What are you going to do if something goes bad? Women might feel in danger if they are in a place they don’t know with someone they don’t know…

So, she might feel more comfortable having you come to her city so if something bad happens, she knows where to go and what to do, she feels safer meeting in her city rather than somewhere else. That's the only reason I can think of.

[Asker]

This women was the one I've been dating for two years...

So you are saying that she is protecting herself from me, after marriage she will ask me to protect her.
This is so weird isn't it?

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Okay, so you’ve been dating for two years, you always go to her place?

Is there a reason she won’t come to your city? Have you asked her?

[Asker]

I asked many times. She only said her mom do not let her go...
Her mom tried to manage our relation,
She asked 300 grams of gold for her daughter marry me
And these came so stupid to me...

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Okay well it seems like her mom is trying to protect her and make sure she’s safe. I don’t know, but it seems like she’s telling the truth.

[Asker]

Then if I marry her
Her mom will call me " Dear groom" for the man which she's trying to protect from her daughter
Right?

[Asker]

My dad died.
She even did not come to funeral ceremony...

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

I’m sorry about your loss. I don’t know your situation to the full extent and I don’t know if I ever will understand it, but it seems like there are just a lot of restrictions in the relationship due to culture or religion?

[Asker]

Virginity is important in my country.

There are two possibilities :

If she visit me in my city, she may be subject to gossips that she lost her virginity
Her mom is trying to protect her virginity

That's all.
From her point of view ,
This means I'm a potential raper... ( Which is so rude for me)

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

That doesn’t mean she think you’re a potential rapist. You said virginity is important in your country and if she visits your city, there will be gossips and rumors, so why would she come to your city after knowing those possibilities?
Plus her mom is protective in general of her daughter, as any mom is.

[Asker]

Is this can be a cause even for not being in funeral ceremony?

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Possibly, or her mom did not allow her to go, because she’s being protective.

[Asker]

Wooow what a mind...

I might plan to fuck her while ı was dealing with funeral

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Consensual sex?

[random_girl95]

Maybe she just wants to escape her whereabouts and be elsewhere without wanting to hide something. However maybe she actually has something to hide from you, we don't know.

[Adam1978]

Because that doesn't cost her any 💵 or ⌚. Especially if you pay for everything when you are there.

[Asker]

She forces me to pay everything...
"Ohhh I'm female" mode...

[Yucy_Gluttony]

It's a bit weird to me to invite myself to your place. You want me to go to your city, just ask :3

[Asker]

I want her to explore where am I living , where I am from

[Yucy_Gluttony]

Invite her then!

[Asker]

I did lots of times she did not arrived

[Yucy_Gluttony]

And why not?

[Asker]

Her mother did notlet her go as she said

[Yucy_Gluttony]

Helicopter parents... Question answered! :) Maybe try staying the night somewhere in the city, but not with her parents. Slowly show the parents she is safe with you

[Asker]

So their parents thinks i may be potential raper

After marriage they may think " Dear groom" right?

[Asker]

I think " Helicopter Parents" may also harm my marriage right?

[Yucy_Gluttony]

Depends on how bad it is! They could just be protective and they might give her more freedom over time

[Asker]

I left her.
So her mom will live happily forever with her

[Yucy_Gluttony]

Well.. problem solved, I guess? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[Anonymous]

Can you give more context?

[Asker]

I always go 300 km to meet her.
But she never gives any physical effort like this to meet me

[Opinion Owner]

Have you asked her to visit you?

[Asker]

Many times

She said her mother do not let her

[Opinion Owner]

There you go, she could be telling be truth

[Asker]

But why?

What isthe mentality behind it?

[Opinion Owner]

She lives with her mom? is she dependent on her? Probably from a conservative family, so her moms decision is the final one

[Asker]

She is from a conservative family.
She is dependent to her mom.
That's why i left her.
But I just wondered.
Why she do not come to my city?
Why she even do not come with her parents?

[Opinion Owner]

Obviously she can't for some reason. I mean only she can say why