Girls, tomorrow I turn 37, still a virgin, never been in a relationship, why bother trying to pursue women?

[Anonymous]

My mom wants me to find a woman and get married within a year or two. This whole nonsense of "work on yourself" is a joke. I graduated with an Honours in political science, I got into grad school, I got my own place in the city, I cook great food, I look youthful for my age, I'm decent looking, I'm in good shape, I have a sense of style, I know when to listen and be caring but also provide a deep understanding on matters whether it's life, economics, law, politics, religion, etc. I don't care if a girl only has a college education and works as an administrative assistant. But I have had a loveless life through parents, I had to fend for myself, fight for myself so I am not some mamma's boy. I always thought commit acts of chivalry, be a nice guy but assertive, whatever it takes nothing works man. I am not some annoying, condescending guy. I try to be mindful of others and try to remain positive. Girls have told me you seem like a smart guy, who's handsome or cute.

- i bought roses once for a girl who said she likes me, only to reject the flowers and say she's with another guy
- girls saying im not good enough
- girls ghosting me
- i skipped prom that was actually on my birthday, asked a girl out in high school who said no, her ex boyfriend from another school wanted to kick my ass for asking his ex girlfriend to prom (nothing happened because he was a wimp), the two schools out of the whole region was my high school and her ex boyfriend's high school... What are the odds. The next day she said, why didn't you come to prom I would have danced with you
- I've had girls on social media and dating apps ask me to send them dick pics or have a one night stand or do a 3-way (2 guys and her)

This is the stupid garbage I had to deal with, I guess Im destined to fail, to always be a virgin, I accomplished a lot in my life individually. If I'm 40 and above one day, I don't care which woman approaches me, at that point ill tell them no thanks since they always rejected me.

[Anonymous]

Have you tried a dating app? It might be worth it, 37 is not really that old for men wanting to date, you don't have to tell them your a virgin or maybe just say you've only had oral or something, some girls want to stay virgins and only give oral. It's a lie but your not hurting anyway with it, accept for yourself maybe.

[Asker]

i tried dating apps, young women on there either have super high expectations, want to see dick pics, have one night stands or something messed up. I've used dating apps since 2015 -- Tinder, Bumble, Happn, and a few others.. nothing.

[Opinion Owner]

Oh okay, sorry I don't know what to tell you then. I guess just wait and see if some women crosses your path eventually but I don't think you should feel like you need to go out looking for it. It a tough society we live, in, it seems other people are more bothered by men and women staying single then the single men and women themselves.

[Asker]

single life is fine when you're young and rambunctious, but how do you think I feel working with people who are in relationships, seeing my cousins get married, living the bachelor life forever isn't cool. People who love the bachelor life tend to be the lonely ones behind closed doors who tries to drown life with drinks or popularity/status in real life or social media. So many girls I know who say I want to remain single and focus on my job, 90% of them say it's because I don't trust guys anymore. My question is why? I dealt with shitty girls but I will still give the next one a chance with my guard up.

[Taylor_C]

If you don't want it, don't do it. Simple as that.

[Asker]

Do you understand something, don't give a generic response. Because all I heard was work on yourself, you're not good enough, you don't have a degree. I worked on myself -- having your own apartment, getting a masters degree, having a job, have my own car, knowing how to cook, still a virgin, don't drink, don't party, haven't slept around, a loyal dude, caring, knows when to give space, chill and etc. For 20 years, most y'all women or girls said "you're not good enough". No, it's frustration, because I have to be confident and say I am good enough. I am not saying that in a cocky way. Because if you want to get into the whole "dude you seem cocky and no woman will like you". I know plenty of girls and women who married or dates a douche bag guy who acts like an asshole to her and to others... so those narrations don't mean much to me in my late 30s.

[Taylor_C]

It seems to me you don't really want to be in a relationship. Your question was "why bother trying to pursue women". The answer is, either you want it bad enough to keep trying or you don't. Nobody else can tell you what to do or not to do. It is really that simple.