Ladies when y'all vent to a guy do you want a solution or for them to just listen and agree with you?

[teamvic]

Cause I and I'd say most guys are looking to give a solution

[quaranta]

I do personally look for solutions and ideas only, and I get put off if all I receive is empathy or empty agreements. But that is because I'm a very rational person who also provides only solutions and ideas and is really bad at showing "alliance" instead, and that precisely causes me a lot of incompatibility with women in general (this plus the type of interests I have cause me to have all male friends), because as you are guessing, that's the point: the vast majority of women is looking for alliance, they don't want any solution or big reasoning behind, they just want to earn your alliance by seeing you agree with them and find common enemies with them. If they talk negatively about someone who hurt them, they want to find common enemies siding with her (I noticed this is really the most common ground they form bonds on). If they are unsure of who you'd side with, they first scan your content to check where you "stand", then they might actually elaborate the content.
If they vent about something they failed at, they want to secure their situation by feeling possibly supported by allies if things go worse, or just to feel validated and encouraged, through triggering their empathy.
If they vent about getting a critique to the work they did, or to an art piece they made, or a behaviour, they want you to counter that opinion and tell them compliments instead, lowering the validity of what that "stupid" said.

So, if you want to give them solutions, you can, but that should be a secondary thing that comes together as an extra, together with the alliance and empathy you provide.

I think this is a safe approach that is valid for the really vast majority, because I cannot absolutely remember any single case in my life of any woman that didn't work this way, of any age, any political orientation, any intellectual level, any context, any culture (most likely I met some, but that's a so small number I can't even remember any).

[teamvic]

Yeah I tend to give solutions too but I also see a lot of girls on instagram talking about that's not what they wanted haha. I think what I'll do is do both so let them vent and side with them or whatever then give them solutions cause I like to try to solve their problems 😂

[Little_Bumblebee]

Little tip, you can always ask what they need before you answer.
Do they want support or do they want help to solve the problem? (Or a pragmatic answer)


My friend asked me this the last time I had an issue not too long ago and I asked for both. First the support and then the pragmatic answer and it was great :)

I think that's a great way to communicate

[teamvic]

Yeah thats probably a good idea🤔 thanks buddy

[Little_Bumblebee]

Hope it helps :)

[rachel776]

just sit there and shut up and then go get me an ice blended

[teamvic]

😳 okay ill keep that in mind😂

[rachel776]

😁
...

[teamvic]

Uhhh by the way. What the fuck is an ice blended

[cryscrys1]

If I vent people tend to vanish
I’m very vigorous ugh