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I'm not the most attractive guy & I've noticed that when SOME girls pass by me... they reciprocate either by frowning, lowering their heads while frowning, or getting annoyed when I haven't done anything
Is this common?
I have been rejected by a beautiful small blond girl with blue eyes that only dates very attractive tall guys. It's a funny story because at the time i did not accept her choosing my friend over me. He is tall, blond and has blue eyes. So i left and i was crying ( i know, guys are not supposed to show our emotions ) and she came after me and told me that if i left, i would never see her again. I still decided to leave. Next thing i know, like 22+ years later i saw her in a completely different town. We were both at the same place, at the same time for an appointment at the hospital. She had a Tim Hortons coffee and i had a Tim Hortons coffee. I sat in the seat right next to her without even realising that it was her at first. I was eating a donut and i had to move my mask to eat it while the secretary left to do something. I noticed that she saw who i was at that moment. When the doctor came to get her for her appointment, he asked if i was with her as her boyfriend. She obviously said no using her head movement. I just barely moved my head but i should of said something like, ''no, she prefers taller, better looking guys''.
How much is Tim Horton's paying you? I mean seriously you mentioned it twice in one sentence.
@HighlyQuestionable Lmao, i wish they were paying me.
Its always the small ones man. They're like little minions wanting to take down a behemoth, don't mind them. Just be the king you are dude. I know that feel. I'm a short ass guy and I got rejected by multiple women shorter than me. Mind you, I found all of them attractive, they all found me unattractive and wanted taller guys. Just the world we live in dude, can't change it.
@TommyWiseau69 Exactly man, no choice but to accept it as it is. Thank you for the kind words. It really means a lot to me.
Women tell me I'm handsome infrequently. I'm only called ugly when I piss them off. Little do they know, idc how I look but that proves how much they value appearances. I don't usually turn heads since I dress basic and I'm pretty unkempt. But compared to when I was a kid, I'm being treated drastically different.
One day, I decided to wear skinny jeans and a tank top. I did track so my thighs are quite developed. I constantly caught women quickly gawking at my jeans and looking away. Some chick at my corner store looked at me completely different than normal. Even dudes treated me with respect. It's happened a few times.
Also, keep in mind how much women value their own appearance. It makes sense that they're interested in good looking people.
If you want a more direct example, look up the handsome convict. Or the dude who accidentally ran over a mother and child. A bunch of women started a petition to free him. I even read a comment saying "He's too cute to be locked up," or something.
I don't care enough about strangers to frown at them or make weird faces when they have done literally nothing wrong. I'm not the type of person to treat a human being like shit just because I'm not attracted to them. It's either your insecurities talking or the women in your area are shallow AF.
I do act nervous and anxious around guys I like. I try to impress them and make them like me... but don't we all do that around people we really really like? When I'm not attracted to someone and we're just friends, I treat them like i treat others.
My particular cases are a bit odd in context
Many & many woman/girls I had to live around or by would get "nervous" or scared by me & either frown purposely when seeing me or lowering their heads if we came across but frowning as we pass by
Half of them would smirk or LOL if they saw me but ignore anything I say/do afterwards
The cashier's would act very cold towards me but "bubbly" with everyone else regardless of gender
To be honest, yes. I think both genders do this even unconsciously, although the people who don't want to, try not to. I know that I make a conscious effort to act the same around everyone, even though if I'm attracted to someone I can't help but treat them a bit differently
If most men tend to act "assholish" by default? Is that also a sign?
@Biancam13 I don't do that.
@ManOnFire I didn't read what she said, but it's bogus. Women always try to make an argument neutral whenever something bad about their gender is pointed out.
Opinion
20Opinion
Of course it's about attractiveness. The 2 main things a female seeks in a man is Attractiveness and Money.
Any female that says they don't care about money or looks are lying. I've heard girls say they are dating an ugly guy and when I see what he looks like, the guy is never less than a 4, never. Ugly to a female is average looking guys, anything worse than that is just not something they would ever date, unless the guy is filthy rich, but even then they marry the guy, year later divorce him take half his shit and fight for even more money.
To only get looked at like that you must be a 4 which means you still have a chance. I get looks of disgust from females and it's because I'm truly ugly like a 0, my eyes had an argument before I was born and they've never been on the same level since, when I watch TV or play games I have to tilt my head so I can watch it properly, of course that last ones not true but it's an example of things females and other people have asked me or said to me. I grew up with the nickname Sloth not because of the animal but because of the guy from the Goonies, just because my eyes are similarly put on my face.
It's just pretty privilege, people who fit into the societal definition of beauty/attractiveness are in general treated better than those who don't.
@Subarugirl I agree, except minimizing by using the word "just" suggests this is unimportant - I think it is very important in that it contributes to the emergence of many psychological problems in the losers in this contest.
@Subarugirl The inordinate emphasis on it is fairly new - women find 80% of men to be unattractive.
@msc545 You mean according to Jordan Peterson who was talking about the Pareto Principle, incorrectly too by the way.
The Pareto Principle is an economic theory that says 80% of the output is determined by 20% of the input, he took that economic principle and tried to apply it to the hetero dating scene which does really work.
The most common study that is generally used to support this concept is the Tinder study which I am sure that you have heard of. There is also another study that predates the Tinder study, done by OK Cupid.
The Tinder study was performed about 8 years ago in 2015 by one guy. He got his data from polling only 27 other male tinder users. No sources, just 27 self-selecting male Tinder users. Now anyone who knows anything about statistics would know that 27 is an extremely small sample size, and that self-selecting contains so much bias that the whole study was tainted from the get-go.
Moving on the OK Cupid study. OK Cupid currently has about 1.8 million users, not quite as many when they conducted their study, but certainly more than 27... Also the didn't use self-selecting, they gather data from their users and the analyze it. They began by having men rate women's attractiveness from 0 to 5, and the curve looked pretty normalized. Women were about as likely to be rated as super attractive as they were to be rated as super unattractive, with the vast majority falling into the 2.5 range. But if you look at who the men are messaging, most are really only messaging the most attractive 5s.
When it comes to women, women were less charitable when rating men's attractiveness, rating about 80% of men below medium, however when they went to message those men they, were only slightly ahead of the curve. About 80% of messages were sent to men ranked average or below. When compared to the men's curve it showed that men were much more likely to be selective about looks
@Subarugirl I think you looked at the wrong OkCupid study and/or interpreted the results incorrectly.
You pretty much said everything that i would have said referring to this question. Thanks. You are 100% right about all of it. If she friend zones a guy, us guys know what that means.
@VforVindication lol yeah it means that she’s not romantically interested in you. That’s obvious
@Subarugirl Your conclusions about the OkCupid study are wrong based on the data.
@Subarugirl You misread the conclusions.
@Subarugirl I think that because I read your inaccurate interpretation of them.
@Subarugirl you misinterpreted and misunderstood the meaning of the results. Please link to the specific results you read
@Subarugirl I read what you wrote and I concluded you are wrong.
@Subarugirl This is a little rhetorical tactic you use, and I've seen it before from you. Won't work with me.
Obviously physical attraction changes the way women behave toward men. All you have to do is be a psychically attractive man and then go on the internet without a profile picture to know that. In real life they will be nice to you just about all the time, flirt with you regularly, and hold back a lot of their negativity. On the internet they will talk mad shit...
This is very common - women do not like to even see unattractive men. If you want to find out how much they dislike men they don't find attractive, try approaching one of them and try to talk to her - you will be shocked at how rude they can be.
lol if you approach someone who obviously doesn't want to be approached by you it's not surprising that they aren't going to be super friendly.
Then don’t approach someone unless you are sure… problem solved
If she is the type to be deeply focused on appearance, then yes, it definitely does happen. But are you sure that they're really doing all those things you described?
Frowns, middle fingers, gossip, rumors, literally gasping if were too close, a few have ran away when they saw me, smirks, LOL'S from afar
Really? Are you SURE you not imagining all that? And if this is really all true then it's either because some woman doesn't like you so she influenced others to hate you too, or you must be doing something wrong. Now, I generally am not one of those people who will say a guy 'must be doing something wrong' just because he's having a bad experience with a woman, but if it's going on this BADLY for you, are you SURE you're not doing something?
It has happened which has made it hard for me to get along with the gals but also very toxic males
When I moved into a particular neighborhood I was literally the "talk" & I was being "targeted" by both genders but more specifically the gals
Rumors, gossip, constant frowns,
I guess it's true... the same way guys act differently based on girls' attractiveness. I'm an introvert myself and unfortunately today I did those things you mentioned as well when I passed by a particular guy sitting near my desk at work. The frowns were not directed to him but to the thought of not being able to finish the assigned work today. Oh, I hope he didn't think I frowned at him. Could be your case as well.
It could be. Sometimes we imagine things but most of the time it is what we think it is.
No
We pass by each other & they either lower their heads while frowning &/or show fear that I might approach them when we just walking. by
Are you really that hideous?
@VforVindication
I seriously don't know because around the same time of those particular events I was getting "signals" from gay men (it's odd)
Nothing worse than getting rejected by women and getting hit on by gay guys. I've experienced that too. They can call me homophobic as much as they like but i stay away from them. We went from allowing them to get married to having men who want to be fake women saying that straight men should date them. We really are in a clown world now.
There is a good chance you reek needy vibes. Girls can sense when a guy wants them but she doesn't him. Thats why they all frown.
I highly doubt is since I'm very laid back & don't show much emotions in my face but rather "whatever" type vibes
I don't get nervous around them or stutter & I make direct eye contact
Female cashier's & clerks would get very serious with me when they attend me & avoid eye contact but I noticed a very important detail
They would talk to me in a "hurry it up" tone when I have to be assisted by them
There more chill with everyone else
Consider that you aren't giving out "vibes", someone is just imagining that you are...
@HighlyQuestionable
What kinds of vibes would you assume?
@Asker
who hadn't ever been rushed at the market? everyone has been rushed at the market. I certainly have numerous times.
I'm gonna tell you a story. There was once I worked as a security guard many years ago at a university. All the girls would say hi and give me the warmest greetings, try to make small talk with me. Most of the guys there would never make any eye contact, never say hi as they entered the building. So over time, i just thought something just didn't seem right. All of them would literally avoid making eye contact with me.
I asked my other fellow female security guards if this ever happened to them. They all said "no". The guys there generally said hi to them.
Then one day, I met a guy who was not like that. He made eye contact normally with me. But then he caught me with lingering eyes at one time. Then he immediately stopped making eye contact with me any more.
This also happened with another coworker of mine. He stopped making normal eye contact with me after that.
I've haven't done it to anyone else other than these two that im a ware of. but people are very receptive to vibes that you aren't aware that you're sending out
@Asker
there was another time where I was shopping at a department store. I turned around and wanted to ask a question to a very tall handsome man (who looked like probably a manager. I"m not really sure who he is but I could tell he was part of the staff). He suddenly completely turned around so that I can't talk to him. I was shocked because he thought i was gonna approach him or something.
i was attracted to him. he sensed that.
i wasn't gonna ask for his number. but just a question about the store.
so you never really know what kinda vibes you send out... you think you are aware but you really aren't.
Yes as more attractive people get more passes and are assumed to have a higher value in all areas. It is life.
yes, all humans do to varying degrees and not always in the same direction as in postive or negative ways. it is a part of human nature. some are better at seeing that they are doing such and go more neutral but no one is infalable.
It is not only girls that behave differently, but guys behave differently too.
🤔 so how would guys view "below average guys" then?
I meant, as girls behave with guys, guys behave with girls.
But I'm curious on other guys see us? From a social POV?
For sure. I used to go from fat to fit and the difference was massive how I was treated by people in general, and especially by women.
LOL that is called pretty privilege. Attractive people generally get treated better by people in general.
"better" is subjective & especially in my case
Many woman much older than me/around my age would get either
Scared of me (flee) it has happened trice
Either frown or lower their heads while frowning
Smirk at me & LOL from afar
Some have gawked at me with a serious undertone but often just let it go
Those are some pretty specific situations of how women have treated you. Do you think any of those could have been due to anything other than your attractiveness level?
I mean obviously you were paying enough attention to them to notice things that they were doing. Do you think there is any possibility that maybe there was something other than your looks alone that illicited those reactions?
I highly doubt it because these same gals are either "too nice" or apathetic towards every other guy besides me
There was a girl who would gasp when she would see me but almost in fear but then eventually got used to my presence & later became somewhat arrogant towards me if we would come into contact
Believe it or not but there was a point in my life where almost the entire (small) neighborhood I lived in was "all over me"
I was the talk of the neighborhood from both genders by the way & almost every gal there had some animosity towards me right from the get go
Okay well they obviously don’t like you for some reason. You can’t entertain the possibility it might be because of something other than just your appearance?
I'm. curiouswhos harder to physically engage with in conversations? Attractive or unattractive guys?
In my opinion and personal experience, unattractive men.
Why are we harder to interact with? Specifically?
Because it’s easier to interact with someone you’re not intimidated by
You're "intimidated" by "us" because we're "unattractive" to you?
Lol you don’t intimate me, however most people are intimidated by rejection.
I won't be so sure... you haven't seen me in person & especially how almost all of my female neighbors WERE "Intimidated" by me for years just by existing
But you're basically scared of us because we're not you're cup of tea?
Oh I am 100% sure that I wouldn’t be intimidated by your physical appearance. Lol
I doubt it & all my female neighbors/classmates can vouch for it
All of them would either "Gasp" when they would be around me, or lower their heads while passing by, or ansgsty look away but with a lot of "fear" or whatever you gals use as synonyms for nervousness
You didn't respond
So you've admitted low key that you would of been another statistic like the "others" who DID get "scared" "nervous" or whatever
Lol maybe it’s because you make people uncomfortable, and it has nothing to do with your looks lol
The "WHYS" though
Why did I make them feel "uncomfortable" because "apparently" I'm the "lesser" which doesn't make sense in context
I'm the one that should feel uncomfortable because I'm "lesser"
Maybe you should ask them..
Ever heard of the Halo Effect? It is natural for people to see attractive people as good and ugly people as bad. Obviously many times they find out looks can be deceiving but it just seems to be something we do.
Everyone acts different with an attractive person, even the law.
I don't react that way. I treat handsome men and ugly men the same. I treat them both with respect. I do act a bit different with the guy that makes me feel comfortable especially if I have a crush on him. I would smile a lot with that guy.
I've been where u are. Same goes for unatractive girls. They dont see people happy around them unlike supermodels.
It is unfair I know. Just can't do anything sbout it.
In fact, we can do something about it: Genetic Engineering, free plastic surgery, Paying the unattractive and those with low IQ to not reproduce... But god forbid we actually fix what's wrong... the "hierarchy" might not have their exclusivity.
If she's interested she'll make it known. If she's not interested, who cares what she thinks of you. You're giving women's opinion of you far too much importance in your life.
Yeah... But I don't think it's as extreme as you put it
Yes they do. People on research it on youtube their called the black pill.
I do believe some girls do, but guys do it as well.
Do guys act differently based on a girl's attractiveness?
Yes if he's not tall he ain't got it all
Yes. 100% yes
We don't act we just get nervous.
Yes they do
1000%
yes!
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