Why does a woman give her phone number on online dating and chat for days asking/giving details about our lives, then suddenly block?

[Anonymous]

I have made this observation lately a couple of times with 4-5 women. I am looking for a long-term relationship and match exclusively with women who seek the same and look for a "mature personality who knows what he wants", willing to start a family etc. Short story: Whatsapp numbers exchanged, a couple of days I get the impression that she is very interested, social media accounts also exchanged. But she messages me less frequently than she expects from me. Conversation is an absolutely normal and respectful exchange about our lives to get to know each other, with a healthy romantic tone - nothing sleazy. When I ask for a real phone call or video call, she is never available, never picks up, would only be available on weekend. Then roughly one of these scenarios play out: She sends me occasionally voice messages instead of a call. As the weekend approaches, she becomes even more absent in our communication and on the weekend she suddenly blocks me everywhere. Or if a date is promised on the weekend, she is absolutely unavailable up until the hour we agreed upon. When called, she doesn't pick up the phone or the number is invalid. Am I constantly running into a kind of romance scam, catfishing etc? Or is this nowadays a frequent behavior of average female users on online dating? Or am I failing to decode something fishy in those "long-term only" female profiles so far? Cheers

[Anonymous]

Sounds like this is a routine and maybe it’s time to switch it up. Whether it’s another dating app, not moving to WhatsApp and instead waiting until you are both comfortable enough to exchange numbers (since WhatsApp is still pretty secretive). One thing to keep in mind when you’re seeking women is that everyone on that app is looking for something, and you may not ultimately be it. Maybe she connects with another guy online or just wasn’t feeling it with you anymore, but it’s all part of the search. Yes ghosting is kinda lame once you’ve gotten to know each other better but it is what it is I guess.

[Asker]

Thanks. The odd thing is, the last woman I encountered that way explicitly told me that "she was only talking to me ignoring other people, since she can only be interested in one person". Probably a lie, but what's the purpose of lying like that? I am quite baffled everytime.

[Opinion Owner]

I absolutely agree, there’s no reason to lie but I think it’s just some people avoid what they feel could be any potential confrontation. On the receiving end, you know in your mind that there’s genuinely no need to lie but that’s a stigma in their own head they need to break out of.

[_Maya_]

I don't think it is catfishing or scamming if they make no attempt to scam. You said conversation was normal. If she wasn't actively trying to get something from you then I wouldn't say that was the case. Sounds more like these girls aren't really interested in being on that site. They might make an attempt but their heart really isn't in it. Almost like they are fooling themselves into thinking they want to date but don't. That is purely a guess because I don't know why anyone would put themselves out there just to do that. Doesn't make sense.

[_Maya_]

Thank you for the most helpful opinion!

[DryGermanGuy]

She's already married/in a relationship and likes to have the kick of some side-guy or to play around with ideas.

[Avicenna]

Maybe she's flakey or took offense to something

[Anonymous]

Doesn’t like you that much