Is it seen as a positive or negative quality by most women if a guy doesn’t have any female friends? Is it something I should be concerned about?

[WhiteBoyChill]

I tend to only really be friends with guys.

I can still talk to a girl, but I won’t really feel any sort of inclination to actually hang out with her, unless I’m actually interested or attracted to her.

Throughout my entire life, I’ve literally just had around 2-3 close guy friends at any one time.

I’ve never actually had any close female friend before.

There was a girl in college though that I’d talk to on occassion when we saw eachother, but we never actually hung out and stuff.

But that’s about it as far as my consistent female interaction goes. Only ever really been with one girl. And even then it was at most probably around 3 times a month, in a cafeteria lunchroom.

All things considered though, I dealt with immense social awkardness when I was younger. But I’m largely past all that now.

I literally could not talk to girls before I turned 17.

But to this day, I’ve never really had any females as part of my regular and active social circle. (I’m 22)

I’m just an introverted dude, and as I said its not like I talk to a shit ton of people in general either.

But internally I feel like I’m satisfied with the friendships I have; a girl doesn’t necessarily have to be part of the equation

I just feel content with only like 2-3 guy friends. For whatever the reason may be.

That’s the way I’ve always done things before and I feel content with it.

I see it as an extreme net positive though because if I ever happen to become a married dude I won’t have to cut any women out of my life.

I mean obviously if some woman said I can’t even talk to my own mother or sister that’d just be insanely toxic but that shit hardly ever happens unless they’re insane.

I’m still physically attracted to women, but I’d much rather have a conversation with a dude, I feel like.

The way I see things, women are mostly just for love/relationships.

[avery58]

I'd consider that a positive and it makes him look like a serious guy. I had an ex boyfriend where we both agreed to not make friends of the opposite gender, even the ones we had made before we limited contact with, and I found that to be the most comfortable type of relationship.

I had a different ex that had girl friends and even took lunch breaks with one (just one on one) and I don't consider that normal. I would tell a friend I had a problem with it and she said there's nothing wrong with him having female friends or going for lunch with them, all of our acquaintances thought this way, and yeah of course that type of arrangement didn't work out.

I'd never date a guy with that kind of open mentality again. It could be well intentioned but it leaves the door open to all types of bs possibilities. There's always a saying I go by "don't do good things that appear to be bad".

[avery58]

Also, I'm not against dating him if he does have female friends already, and I have guy friends. As long as he agrees to limit contact if we get into a relationship (of course I will to). But what you described is not negative at all.

[WhiteBoyChill]

I agree. I mean personally I wouldn’t even feel comfortable with having female friends if I was in a relationship. I would let them all know “hey sorry, I’m in a relationship now so I don’t feel its appropriate for us to continue talking anymore”

[alice55]

I don't know about other women but personally I find it attractive. I would say jealous women prefer it this ways and other would prefer if he a friend of the opposite sex because they're more into the whole men and women can be friend.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Ah gotcha. I mean I’m not against having a female friend necessarily, but internally it just doesn’t really seem like a necessity.

[alice55]

I mean you're friend with who you share similarity and stuff to share with, if you got nothing to share with the women you know, it's not surprising you didn't get along enough to truly be friend.

[WhiteBoyChill]

That’s how I see it as well.

[Dongie]

I was a lot like that. Painfully shy. But began having female friends at about 26 or 27. I have a lot now. One Mexican named Dina is sweet as pie. About 20 years younger than me. Another Gracie 48, self professed alcoholic. I call her my Mexican spitfire.

[WhiteBoyChill]

D*mn. Is her alcoholism a serious issue though?

[WhiteBoyChill]

I feel like a lot of introverted dudes don’t have female friends tho. It seems more like it only tends to be the extroverted dudes that do

[Dongie]

Yes, very. Dina and I tell her she won't make 50. She will binge until she's so tired and that goes non-stop for 2+ to 3+ days. Then she will sleep for 20 or more hours. And be ready to go again. It's a sad thing. But she will get in your face if she don't get her way. I had picked her up from a friend's house and she wanted to go somewhere. I said I'm going home, this is while she rented a room in my home because I met her when she was on the street, she stomped her feet on my floorboard like a child then grabbed my gear shift and tried to put it in park. I caught it at neutral. And almost struck at her. I've never hit a woman but I had just got my car out of the shop for a new engine out of the crate. Backorder from Ford took 4 months 10 days. I walked home 4 miles in the rain and was held up by a long train on my 60th birthday. I had it out just over a week. The next day, sober, she apologized

[WhiteBoyChill]

D*mn. Does anyone in her family know about how she’s doing?

Also, is it possible to refer someone to treatment against their will?

[Dongie]

She has 2 sisters, one nice, and the other gave up. She is closest to Dina, and she keeps trying. She hardly talks to me. I'm not sure, but it may be because of Roberto. She and I used to get in yelling fights, and he saw them as he lost his apartment during a string of bad weather. And moved in my house for 5 months till he got them in a nice apartment. He does construction and is a hardworking, very good man. He puts up with so much, and he loves her. 2 years, well closer 3 now, her husband tricked her and took all the tools and truck that she ran as a general contractor and ran off with a younger senorita. He is 10 years younger than her, and she got his legal status here. Gracie was born near San Antonio. She lived on the streets from an abusive upbringing, and then her husband had a girl pregnant, which Gracie cannot bare children. Being raped and passed around as a kid. That's when she snapped I guess.

[Dongie]

No, to against will. Not in America. That's why we see all the looney leftists. Check out the number in mental hospitals in the 50s along with population then look at now.

[WhiteBoyChill]

I suppose it is mostly childhood trauma that makes people susceptible to alcoholism

[Dongie]

Yeah, the majority traumatized self medicate, which can be fine in moderation.

[Juxtapose]

Seems kind of weird to me, like you have trouble socializing with women. Could just be a coincidence though that you ended up with guy buddies exclusively.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Nah, its that until I reached the age of legal adulthood, I dealt with severe social awkwardness. I don’t have social awkwardness anymore, but I am an introvert with a small handful of guy friends. It’s just what I feel accustomed to

[serious]

No, I don't think that is a negative quality

[Radiate143]

I don't deal with guys who have female friends. Guybis yournfriend hoping for a turn one day. He's friends with them because he is attracted to them. PERIOD.

[katiesmuff]

I don't think there is anything unusual about the way you are.

[Seinna]

I prefer if he doesn't.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Does have them or doesn’t have them?

I feel it opens up the possibility of a relationship much better, to not already have my hands tied.

If you were a guy that only cared about sex tho? Having multiple female friends could be beneficial. And in all honestly, I think most of the dudes with extensive female friends are mainly just hoping to slither in their underwear someday from what I understand

[Seinna]

I prefer if he doesn't have female friends but it's not a deal breaker... unless most of his friends are female or he has many of them. It's not even jealousy. I'd just think there's something wrong with him if he prefers to spend his time with girls rather than other men, that he's effeminate or a fuck boy as in your example. But I'm not paranoid about it if he has one or two if he's not very close to them or they're his long term/childhood friends. I'm not going to break up friendships because of my insecurities if he doesn't give me a reason to be insecure... but I also don't think normal straight guys care so much about friendships with girls.

[WhiteBoyChill]

True. I don’t really care much about befriending women personally