Why didn't she text me all day?

[Anonymous]

Now, granted she had something to do, i figured she'd at least say hey. Are women really not going to initiate. It's not like she hasn't been forward with me either, she was the first to tell me she liked me, and she even asked me out first. Girl knows what she wants, so, I'm like, wow

But yeah, maybe I'm just making a big deal out of nothing. Only real reason I'm asking is because I need an answer from her about something, but don't want to come across as needy

Updates

1 y

I didn't text her all day either, so I can show I'm not needy

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm dude, it's hard to say for sure why she didn't text. A few possibilities:

- She could've been busy with friends/family and just forgot to message.

- Might've needed a break after making the first moves, so let you initiate this time.

- Maybe she's playin it cool now that you're officially a thing, testin if you'll put in effort to stay in touch too.

I wouldn't overthink it man. Since she's usually the one kickin things off, don't make it into a whole deal. Just hit her up casual like "Sup, you free later?" Get your answer without makin it seem desperate.

Girls still like a guy who can play it chill too sometimes. One quiet day means nothin - she prob still likes you dude! Just say hey like normal and see how she responds. Ain't no need stressin over small stuff. You got this!

[Asker]

I texted her later on, asking her about what i needed from her. she didn't reply until 15 hours later, saying "i can't go, i forgot i have a barbecue". I don't know if she was talking about getting together on Friday (after she said said "wanna hang out on Friday"), or if she's talking about what im really trying to get her to do.

She's just not the fastest texter in the world. I did try to call her about it, because i needed her to clarify, but, it went to voicemail after 5 rings. She was likely working, so, i understand that, but, I'm bummed she didn't call back when she was off work (3 am). I would have been sleeping of course but, she could have at least called and left a message, right?

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man that's kinda weird, like she could've at least answered your question faster about whatever you needed from her. 15 hours just to say she can't go is pretty lame. And yeah leaving you hanging on the call without calling back is also not cool.

I don't know dude, girls can be confusing sometimes. Part of me would say don't stress yet cuz like you said maybe she was busy with work and stuff. But the other part of me thinks if she was really into you still she woulda made more of an effort to properly answer you and call back right? That's what's bothering me about it.

I'd say talk to her again tonight and try to get some straight answers out of her. Like ask her straight up, are you blowing me off or what's really up? You gotta communication with her to figure out what's really going on in her head. If she's still giving you vague answers and taking forever to reply, then you'll know she's lost interest unfortunately. But hopefully she's just been distracted and will make more of an effort moving forward. Keep me posted on what she says!

[Asker]

yeah

[Asker]

So, it was that she said she can't go because she forgot she had a thing, and then work. But, she's still going to do what we're doing in a month. I just was trying to clarify that with her. I texted her today, saying i need her to fill something out, for an appointment for something, but that if she'd rather i do it, i can, it's just, she knows her schedule better than me, so, it'd be easier for her to do it. I haven't heard from her today, im hoping i do. As i said, she had a thing, then work, so, she's likely currently at work, depending on when the thing ended. she works late-graveyard though

[Oliverlogan263]

Ahh gotcha bro, thanks for clarifying. Sounds like she's probably still down to hang in a month, just her schedule is tight right now.

I wouldn't sweat not hearing from her yet today - graveyard shifts are brutal, she's prob just crashed after work. At least you shot her a casual text about needing that form filled, ball's in her court now.

I say give it til this evening/tonight before thinking something's up. She might hit you back later when she wakes up to recharge. If not, maybe send one more follow up tomorrow just being like "no worries if you're busy, just lmk what you think is best."

But then I'd back off after that. Don't wanna bug her too much and come off desperate, ya know? She knows you're just trying to plan something practical. Girls like a dude who's organized.

I'm sure once she's got more sleep she'll get back to you quickly. Try not stress too much in the meantime bro - go slay it at the gym or ball with the boys to keep busy. It'll work out!

[BetaBucks]

Maybe she felt like she came on too strong and felt the need to pull back. Playing some of that hot/cold push/pull kind of game. Girls tend to think a ton about this kind of stuff so don't be surprised if she's being more calculated once she feels the vulnerability of feelings. You just have to play the game back.

Also, she might have got back with her ex, or at least started banging him again. Girls go awol when that happens, up until things fall apart again. Usually takes a few weeks. Never forget that almost no girl is truly single. There's another dude out there that they're all still trying to work it out with. But they're mostly getting pumped and dumped by the dude, while they give 100% of themselves to him. And a fraction to you.

[DishLady]

Omg… yeah, also don’t text her, that’ll show her. And if you both keep this up you’ll stop contacting each other altogether. Perfect.

[Nikki1989]

You know you can talk on the phone.

Good grief.