How to blow off a guy nicely?

[Anonymous]

say I am at a party and a guy comes up to me to talk (even though I'm sitting with friends) and I'm not interested in him. What is the nicest and most polite way to avoid him and show I'm not interested?

I kept up the convo and eventually some guy he knew passed by so I took the chance to leave while he was distracted.

[markml]

It is actually far nicer to be sincere.

If you have to blow him off, go ahead and blow him off. The "I'm really busy" is a euphemism that's pretty well understood when it's obvious you're not that busy. The "I kinda need some time to myself" works well as well. And if he's really getting on your nerves, there's always, "Please leave me alone."

None of these things are nice, but that's kind of the point. Blowing someone off is not a nice thing to do! But passive aggression (pretending to be interested only to be polite, and then running away) is even less nice.

Well, actually...if you want a nice way to give a guy a hint he's barking up the wrong tree...what you can always do is pass the buck. Tell him, "You should go over and talk to that girl over there." Or introduce him to one of your friends/frenemies. That should work well.

But all this talk about how to get rid of a guy is probably not the right way to think about the situation. In my opinion, it's far better not to worry about whether a guy is interested in you, or if you're interested in him. You don't need to worry about those things right away. If a guy comes up to talk to you, and you start out as friendly, one of two things will happen: 1) You end up having a very interesting conversation, 2) The conversation itself is boring or annoying. If he is boring you, you will act bored. If he is annoying you, you will act annoyed. These things will come naturally, so long as you don't worry about having to lie to him to protect his feelings.

If on the other hand, you actually enjoy the conversation, then that's not a bad thing. It doesn't mean you're automatically interested in him, and as long as you're equally friendly with everyone who isn't overly annoying, he has no reason to think you are. You could have a great conversation even though at the end of it, you're confident he's not your type. On the other hand, it's also possible that your initial instinct to blow him off will change after talking to him. Either way, you win because you're not bored.

[justathought191]

We call it the two by four rule at our house. You do the nicest thing possible to get your point across. For some guys leaving when a friend comes by is more than enough to make it clear that you're not interested...some guys need to be hit over the head with a two by four. The trick is that you start out as small and as nice as possible. Don't start with a fatal blow if a whisper will be enough. And then, good luck.

[Anonymous]

i just act really boring, give one word answers and look obviously disinterested

[albinolady01]

Just act like you're not interested...act bored...or be boring...

[uber069]

sounds like you did just fine