Is it bad if you don't smile back at a girl? Does it hurt her feelings?

[Anonymous]

Whenever a girl smiles at me, I stare at her with a blank face. I don't smile back because I don't want to come across as feminine. Real men don't smile. Is it bad if you don't smile back at a girl? Does it hurt her feelings?

Updates

+1 y

"Real men are unashamed to smile." WHAT THE? That's ridiculous. That's like saying real men are unashamed to get on their knees/wear pink panties/suck d1ck. Smiling is a feminine thing to do. It's a fact, not an opinion. I don't want to come across weak and feminine.

[Rush2112]

I had this experience today actually. There's this guy I'm interested in, we look at each other a lot and I'm super super shy. I finally worked up the courage to smile at him (believe me, that took A LOT of courage for me) and he didn't smile back, just continued to stare at me.
How do you think that made me feel? Rejected, unwanted, unattractive, like I'd made a mistake and done the wrong thing and like he didn't want me to smile. Is some of that my own insecurities? Probably. But I don't think smiling is feminine. It's all in HOW one smiles. I think a soft grin on a man is extremely sexy and believe me, feminine is the last thing I'm thinking about. My heart melts and stomach flips when guys smile like that.
I would have loved for this guy to smile back today. Because now, I'm scared to ever smile at him again and honestly, I probably won't because he didn't give me any indication at all that he liked that I smiled at him. It was actually kind of a blow to my already low ego and it makes me want to continue staring at the ground whenever I see guys pass me.
So please, in an effort to save other girls from feeling the way I do, just throw them a little smile. I guarantee their pulse will quicken and they will like it and feel very good about themselves. Also put yourself in her shoes. Do you like to be smiled at? Would it hurt your feelings if you offered a smile to a girl and she just gave you a blank, emotionless expression in return?

[Battooot]

That guy likes u. It happened to me once, she smiled at me and i didn't smile back although i found her really attractive (either i felt uncomfortable smiling back or didn't want to ask her out). if i never talked to a girl before but i was attracted to her i would just make eye contact with her, sometimes we just do it to see if the girl is interested (ego boost or something) so that doesn't necessarily mean we r gona ask her out. In ur case, the guy either doesn't plan to ask u out. Or he is too shy to do so.
I think it's more of him being shy. but one thing for sure, is that he LIKES U. we don't give long eye contacts to girls we don't find attractive.

[Rush2112]

So him not smiling back isn't a bad thing? And if it is just a matter of him being shy, what would you suggest I do then? Continue to smile?

[Battooot]

If it's in a bus or metro-like setting where u only saw him once it can be hard to do anything. cause u'l never know whether he's doing it just for small ego & self confidence boost or just too shy.
However, if it is in a work or school setting where u see him often and u always exchange contact then i would guess he probably is shy. Some guys like me all they need is a first step from the girl then they will take it from there (depending how confident the guy is). So i suggest maybe try to ask him a question, or make an excuse to go talk to him.

But which setting is it? is he at ur work?

[Rush2112]

He's in class with me, so I see him a lot. And this behavior has been going on since August. I actually asked a question on my profile about this very situation, so if you want to hear more details you could read that; it's much more detailed.

[chamaae]

i had the same thing and it really did hurt my feelings because i really liked the guy but he doesn't show any interest in me although i always find him staring at me, i don't know what to do anymore !

[UubMaster1988]

I completely agree! There's this guy at my current job who used to return my smiles all the time. Then he suddenly stopped smiling back... So it made me become distant and disengaged.

[Rose96]

I never thought of smiling as feminine. I like when guys smile at me. And yes I would feel bad if a guy just gave me a blank stare like that. I am sure if you smile at a girl she won't doubt your manliness. It's just a nice thing to do, there's really not much more to it.

[Asker]

Smiling is a reaction to a feminine emotion (just like crying and giggling). How come powerful men like Putin (almost) never smile?

[ShesSoSilly]

I personally don't think that smiling is feminine.. everybody can smile. But yeah I wouldn't think anything good when someone doesn't smile back.

[Asker]

why would I smile back at a stranger? I don't even know her. would you think he isn't attracted to you?

[ShesSoSilly]

Yeah if I didn't know a guy and there was eye contact or smiling or something and he did do it back I would assume he's not interested. Of course there are various circumstances where maybe body language or other facial expressions say otherwise, but in general I wouldn't think you were interested.

[ShesSoSilly]

@update I personally feel that is an opinion it is not fact. I haven't seen any guy answer saying they feel this way about smiling... and every girl as said they'd prefer a guy smiling.. so.. Just saying don't be so hard on yourself, smiling is not even comparable to crying or whatever emotion men view as unmanly.

[Asker]

Smiling is even more unmanly than crying. The only thing more unmanly than smiling is giggling.

[ShesSoSilly]

Okay well you're entitled to your opinion. Apparently you feel strongly about it so you can think what you want even though every answer disagrees with you. Have a nice day.

[Anonymous]

Smiling isn't masculine or feminine. Gender identity doesn't factor into it at all.

Smiling is a behavioral gesture that we, as humans, have evolved as part of our social structure. A smile indicates that you're non-threatening, friendly, reassuring and/or harmless. Not because you have to be, or because you're forced to be, but because you choose to be. It's used situationally, not exclusively.

You smile at children and women to show that you mean them no harm. They don't want to be harmed, so they're attracted to that. Smiling at random dudes? Yeah, probably not a good idea, evolutionarily speaking. But smiling at women and children? They're not going to jump you, bash your skull in and steal your women, so smiling at them is perfectly fine.

[Asker]

Smiling is a reaction to a feminine emotion (just like crying and giggling). How come powerful men like Putin (almost) never smile?

[Opinion Owner]

Like I said, it's fine to smile, but only when you want to convey to someone that you mean them no harm. Putin is a total badass, and he wants to make sure you know he could kill you with two fingers and/or any random object that happens to be lying around, like a puppy. So he doesn't smile very much, especially in public. But you can be pretty sure that he smiles at his wife, concubines, random women he wants to screw, and his children, and that's fine.

[DaniJ]

haha well put.

[Battooot]

bro, u've got a wrong understanding of what is a MAN. If you're too into being a hardcore heroic brave strong man then u've watched way too many movies and developed ur own idea of being a man, that's ur fault and ur own opinion. Just dont drag us other men into this.

almost none of us think smiling is feminine. so don't say its a FACT. thanks in advance.

[DaniJ]

Um, smiling is not feminine. Smiling is the body's natural reaction to joy. just as laughing is the natural reaction to hearing something funny. I think people who don't smile look rude and bored. Anyway, yes, it is bad if you don't smile back. If you don't smile at a girl who smiles at you, she will think something is wrong with her or something. If you do smile, she will think you are a normal, friendly human being who acknowledges her existence.

[Anonymous]

my crush does that to me when we make eye contact- I'll smile at him and he will look at me with a blank expression.. it kinda makes me self conscious. I would like it if he smiled back at me. I like it when guys smile at me when I smile at them.. it makes them seem more friendly and approachable

[0202vogue]

Thank god you're alive. I thought I was the only one this was happening to! Lol

[Luna-o3o]

Wth is wrong with you? I love guys that smile. Its so charming. If I smile to a guy and he doesn't smile back, I will feel like an idiot.

[Luna-o3o]

@Update: Its not!

[trickysitch213]

what happens if an unattractive guy smiles at you?

[omgwtflol]

Smiling is not feminine but giving the blank stare could make you look creepy or make her feel self conscious. Try a smirk or a head nod. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

"Real men don't smile"

I smiled when I read that. More ladies for me.

[Rush2112]

Hahaha this comment is perfect. Thank you for getting it. I love when guys smile!

[Anonymous]

Yes at least for me this happened many times lol, I would smile at random men for no reason but none smiled back lol, it made me feel like I’m not attractive...

[HonestGuyAnswersInf]

Lmao I don't smile back because I'm shy like I'll give a straight face but in my mind I'm like "Omfg you're cute as fuck, marry me." Yeaaaah and they get the wrong idea, I should probably change that habit :P

[Nuns_in_Heat]

Jesus what is this National Troll Day?
Watch out y'all! The Trolls be comin in HOT!!!

[Lj236]

when was smiling feminine lol. I thought smiling just meant you were happy or friendly

[Anonymous]

I don't smile much at all.

So I understand where you are coming from though I wouldn't say smiling is feminine.

[antonlikesmlb]

Real men are unashamed to smile.

[antonlikesmlb]

Smiles exude positive energy, are non-threatening, and show that you have guts.

[Asker]

Smiling is a reaction to a feminine emotion (just like crying and giggling). How come powerful men like Putin (almost) never smile?

[antonlikesmlb]

link I bet you're getting ass left and right so you might as well not listen to me. I'm sure girls are all over tense and boring guys.

[sovetskii13]

Men smile. Smiling is not feminine.

[Klaatu51]

i don't even notice if a girl smiles at me

[LilKim]

Well at least wink or nod!

[Anonymous]

Yeah it does and it makes you look aloof.

[Asker]

why would I smile back at a stranger? I don't even know her. would you think he isn't attracted to you?

[Opinion Owner]

I would think he finds me creepy, and I would be like "well f*ck this dude."

[99PROBLEMS]

That is mean.