Questions: Girl's Behavior

I met this girl start of last year at work (ages 21, 22). We immediately connected, and became friends. A month ish later we ended up hooking up, naturally transitioned to a situationship.

we used to hang out after work, do *ahem* stuff, play Fortnite, deep talk, and fell asleep cuddling tightly. She said didn’t want commitment, that she had fears. said she does like me and would’ve pursued something with me if it wasn’t for where she was in life right now.

Life happened, and we stopped, tho we kept being friends. Few months later I invite her to hang out and the next day, she tells me tbh she wants to resume (the casual stuff) and that she feels a type of something but was too shy to reinitiate. So we did.

After that didn’t see her for a few weeks cos went to see family in Italy. when I came back we hung out and she mentioned that our mutual friend/coworker mentioned to her I still had feelings for my ex… tbh back then time I was going through a confusing time. I was honest and admitted I still had feelings for my ex and that we met up right after I came back. She seemed uncomfortable, said go she’s glad for me for me but later on she said it felt weird. Few days after that she was fine, but then she stopped replying to my messages completely. Heard from the coworker that snitched that she was going through a rough time.

Heard she had her yearly visit to her hometown around then. she came back to work around January this year. she seemed open and cold at the same time. When our shift ended the same time I said I went to get food and she followed me. Convo was pretty good, but when I suggested getting ice cream she said “I’m not just gonna go wherever you go”. ? she's still replying to my messages in good time and isn’t dry. It’s been a while since then and it’s all still similar.

I guess I liked her more than I thought, and I feel really bad how all this unfolded. I still care about her a lot.

Do you think I hurt her and she’s salty, and that I played her?

I notice that women seem to be more afraid of a backlash for their ideas/opinions more than men. I remember seeing a video from Sarah Dawn Moore months ago where she was low-key threatening to shut her channel down because of the hate she was getting. Pearl Davis also couldn't help but talk about how she gets hate as well.

I've also seen on other platforms that females will sometimes go as far as to delete their opinions entirely or even their whole accounts if they get hated. Even on GaG you have females that will answer honestly, but only do it anon cuz they're worried about who will know or hate them if they show their real selves.

What do you guys think?