What does it mean when a guy says he wants to feel needed by a woman?

Question

Yesterday I was cuddling with my boyfriend. I gripped his arm tight and he said "I love it when you that, it makes me feel like you need me, and that makes me feel good."
How did me gripping his arm make him feel needed? And why does it seem to be so important for men to feel needed?

Metlahead · Accepted Answer

Because sharing your life with someone is important to humans, as we are social creatures. Above that, vulnerability comes in, especially to men. Sharing his life with you while highly desired, is also leaving him vulnerable to you. Feeling wanted/needed/desired abolishes that vulnerability and makes it feel like you are a team. And it is you guys against the world.

The opposite of this would be you not making him feel needed. He would feel abandoned, worthless, undesired, and alone. People get desperate in those circumstances and end up lashing out in various ways. Usually bad ways.

If you do not want to feel needed or desired by him, there might be something wrong with your relationship, or you may have some sociopathic tendencies (joking... kind of).

As for the gripping of his arm, his "love language" may be predominantly "physical touch," meaning that, to him, there is no greater way to show love than physical touch, whether is be long hard hugs, gripping of his arm, cuddling, sex, massages etc. Physical touch probably means more to him than words of affirmation (You are the best, I love you, I need you, etc.), acts of service (going out of your way to do things for him), gifts, and quality time does. Not that those other 4 aren't part of it too.

You can, and should, ask him what he thinks shows him the most love and desire. And you should figure your own love language out too, and talk to him about it.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It is a part of our biology. Women have reproductive power, which means a woman has value to a man simply because she exists. There is no shame in this like women might think. Remember, women are the sole source of a man's genetic immortality. This reproductive power is so valued by men, that since humans first appeared men have been willing to die to protect women. This is why feeling desired may be enough for a lot of women.

Men on the other hand only have value based on what we provide for the woman. We have no other value to offer the woman in return. This is why men need to feel needed, in order to feel secure in a relationship. In this way, we both contribute to the relationship.

This is also why women can gender bend without being looked down on as much as men. No matter what a woman retains her reproductive power, even if she has a man's job and can provide as well. A man that fails to provide, has no reproductive value, which means he is a person with no value.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Omg get outta there ths is jst a manipulative tactic he's using 2 get in ur pants and believe me once he gets what he wants ull b the 1 chasing he won't need 2 feel needed by u anymore if he's a rotter he's gna send out more mind games he dnt sound 2 good jst take it slow with ths guys or dump I'm esp if u not in a realationship wateva u gna offer him is not gonna make it one.thts hw I lost mine and ill hve 2 live with that regret so jst dnt fall in2 tht same I need 2 feel needed trap!

northernlight · Accepted Answer

I think for some men there is nothing that makes them feel more manly than a woman who feels like she needs him. Most men want to provide for and protect their woman and they want their woman to feel like they need that protection.

chidude · Answer

Okay, I'm gonna tell you what's in his mind. You're not aggressive enough. You're probably too passive in your affection. You should make more moves. I'm all for girls not making the first move but you need to make some... he is probably initiating everything and that's no bueno to him.

thesamjw · Answer

He doesn't want to be alone. If the person he's with "needs" him, then he knows he's not alone and that burden is lifted off his shoulder's. And it's not necessarily a guy or girl thing, but a people thing.

How often do we hear people gossip and talk about other people? How many times do we look at our phones or computers, surfing the net, reading news, looking at instagram, facebook, or any sort of content on the internet (including porn)?

How long can I go without looking at my phone? Can I just sit down and be still for an hour? Can I be with myself for that long? Just me and my mind? No distractions that take my mind off myself?

Gustafsone12584 · Answer

It's the same thing with woman isn't it? It's a nice feeling to be needed. How does it feel to be needed within yourself. Overall, it's a codependent way of feeling, having someone makeing you feel that way, but it can also can be a good thing too, because it shoes that he cares about you, it shoes that you make him feel right. What does it make you feel when he says that?

imaguytoo · Answer

There is a quote from that show 'Sons of Anarchy' that the character Gemma said. "Men need to be loved. Women need to be wanted."

capncool · Answer

He likes the bonding, and he wants to feel needed because men want to feel like women want them, and women need them. If not, then we just feel useless.

Anonymous · Answer

Wow and you're his girlfriend, heck I think those things and I'm single.

SaltandVinegar · Answer

We want women to want us and need us. We want to provide for them and protect them.

Anonymous · Answer

Coz he would have thought that hold will be great on his tool too. And he likes as he feel he is important to you.

Lakerfan525 · Answer

Because it makes us feel like a man

ADVISER-MAN · Answer

A macho pacho

What does it mean when a guy says he wants to feel needed by a woman?

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If a guy feels like he needs this particular woman what does it mean?

What does it mean when a guy says he wants to feel needed by a woman?

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If a guy feels like he needs this particular woman what does it mean?

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