Please help. He shows signs of interest but doesn't add me on social media. Why?

[Anonymous]

😭😭😭😭
signs like prolonged eye contact, not looking away when I catch him, checking me out publicly and staring from a distance.

[Paragon2001]

Well if he likes you thats a logical reason for him not to add you. Maybe be doesn't want you to see the things he posts or maybe he doesn't wanna be to obvious. It's normal for guys and even girls to like the posts of the opposite gender and add them because they aren't nervous around them, don't care about them and/or what they think about them and don't have feelings for them so they have nothing to lose. It may sound confusing but that's how things work sometimes. It's the same reason girls sometimes ignore/pretend not to see the guy they like when walking past each other. We all want to appear our bests around those we like. We get nervous and sometimes try to avoid doing things and making bad impressions.

[king34]

he doesn't want you to see his social media

[Asker]

Why not? He adds many random people, why wouldn't he want me to see his social media? (He's single btw)

[king34]

he probably post things he might be embarrassed for you to see, or maybe he follows a lot of girls or likes a lot of hot girls pictures.

[Asker]

He indeed likes other girls' pictures, but what does it have to do with me and with his interest?

[king34]

cuz he might think you won't like it

[Asker]

Why would he care

[king34]

because he likes you

[Asker]

But isn't it more logical to add the girl u like on social media instead of keeping liking other girls' pics he's not interested in? Cuz you like that girl you wanna see her pics no? I don't understand why guys would do the reverse

[king34]

that's just how our minds work

[Asker]

I thought guys were the rational ones?

[king34]

yes but were stupid at the same time, like in his mind I just makes more sense not to add you on social media

[Asker]

aw how cute. Thank you for your help!! :)

[SarahsSummer]

I think king34 nailed it. Lol.

[QueenofCups]

Fuck social media. If you like this guy, go up to him in person and flirt with him.

[OhMyLeniency]

He probably dont wanna make it obvious

[annon14568]

because he doesn't want others to know about you. it means he is a good person. he may be shy like me... i do the same. go talk to him or he will never talk to u and just blame himself later for not doing so. ask him directly what u seek or what's in ur mind.

[Asker]

What if he doesn't like me and just leading me on? I don't wanna embarrass myself. Cuz he is not shy, he's a confident, outgoing and popular guy, that's why he doesn't look away when I catch him, he stares until I look away. nevertheless, he doesn't initiate anything although he shows non verbal signs of interest. :(

[annon14568]

like i said... he is like me. outside i show people that i am confident, outgoing and ik i'm popular. but when it comes to girls. i can talk any stuff but not the talk like crush, love, etc.

or whatever.. what the worse could have happen. u'll get embarrassed. talk to him and if it comes to embarrassment... then deal with embarrassment later.

[Asker]

Could you tell me what u could do to seem more approachable? apart from smiling and eye contact, that's basic and can be mistaken for just being friendly

[Asker]

I mean what I could do as a girl to seem more approachable

[annon14568]

hm... i m thinking. 🤔

[annon14568]

try to spend alone time with him. or talk to him when he is alone. if he is interested... he will start the conversation

[annon14568]

and the last resort is ask help from some mutual friend.

[demonics]

I try to avoid girls I like on social media... they typically ruin the attraction two posts in... "Oh great... feminist." or worse:

primility.com/.../annoying-girl.jpg

[Ice_In_The_Cubs]

You are prolly paying way too much attention to small signs like those. If he is intrested he shouldn't add you on social media, he should approach you. I feel like social media is really non important if he is really intrested. Thats my opinion.

[Supes]

agreed

[WiseTurtle]

Because God knows why (being shy, afraid, already got a girlfriend, ...)
media.giphy.com/media/26tk1mzy88NFR5aiQ/giphy.gif

[Anon85]

Probably doesn't want to seem like a creeper, and for good reason.

[Asker]

But he adds girls he doesn't talk to on IG? Why isn't he worried about being a creeper in their eyes?

[Anon85]

Probably because he doesn't care what they think of him. It's the same reason us guys have no problems talking to girls we have no interest in, because there's nothing for us to screw up. If it's someone we're interested in, then we want to be the best and most attractive versions of ourselves around her

[Asker]

So what should I expect from him? Months have passed and no initiation neither physically nor on social media.

[ska827]

He wants you to get to know him in-person and not what he posts online. I have a friend who dated her boyfriend for weeks and months, before even adding him on social media. It's better to talk in person if you're interested first, than online.

In my opinion, if you add each other on social media, it can take the fun out of dating and getting to know someone slowly and in-person.

[jansoka]

being interested into someone without social Media is even better!
It means that He is More serious

[Asker]

But he doesn't initiate ANYTHING! he hasn't talked to me and this silent eye gazing game has been going on for months... What do you think about that?

[jansoka]

I also was to shy to make the First step towards my actual (And First :D ) girlfriend
so maybe Just wait For a good Situation and signalize him Your interests clearly.
I would be also too shy to start contacting

[jansoka]

many Boys Tried the First contact and failed in a Bad way so they try to Not Ruin the Situation and so they wait For signals

[Asker]

Ok but this guy is not a shy type. He's pretty confident and has many female and male friends. He has girls chancing him, yet he's single. Why would a confident guy behave like that if he shows signs of interest?

[kickass_arman]

He is definitely crushing on you and wants YOU to add him first

[None11am]

Exactly.

[Asker]

How do I make sure he's not leading me on?

[kickass_arman]

Sorry, I don't know the answer to that. 🙁 (I am not an expert in this topic)

[None11am]

Simple, you ask him out and see what his answer is. It sounds terrifying, but it's better than just guessing.

[DESTROY]

why ask your self the question? why not just add him and tell him you like him.

[Asker]

Only if everything was that easy for a shy and prideful girl like me

[Anonymous]

He doesn't want add you on his social media cause he fears of what you may think of post you may see or you may contact people he follows.

[Supes]

Probably thinks your so much Poetry in Motion, that he couldn't possibly be your type, by thinking that anything he said would be Cliched or Dorkey, not Cute and endearing :)

[blayke]

I think you are too worried, everyone is different. If it is a problem then just ask. Simple as that.

[Anonymous]

Girl he will never add you but stalk you unless you ask him for Facebook, or just bring up the topic about it and he will maybe ask it.

[LonelyBird5]

He's shy aaaw. You gotta bust a move first

[RedRobin]

Why can't you add him?

[karimtera]

probavly waiting for you to take that step

[memelordsupreme]

maybe he thinks that's going too fast?

[1995ALEX1995]

Maybe he has embarrassing stuff.

[Rojaasu]

might not know how to use social media like me

[Asker]

He uses it pretty frequently and adds girls and guys that he doesn't even talk tot hat much. But me. He doesn't initiate anything yet stares

[Rojaasu]

then he could be shy on the internet

[Chanel1981]

How do you know him?

[Asker]

college. I see him quite a lot in the hallways and a lot of times we accidentally "bump" into each other in public places. We don't have mutual friends, rather mutual aquaintances. He added my close friend on IG but won't add me

[Chanel1981]

Why not add him?

[Asker]

Because I'm not reassured that he likes me. and I'm a very shy and prideful persona, so I need a bit more obvious signs from him (like adding me on social media?)

[Chanel1981]

Do you have mutual FB friends?

[Asker]

Lots

[Chanel1981]

Then I don't think it's strange at all

[Asker]

What exactly isn't strange?

[Chanel1981]

Friend requesting him

[Asker]

Oh, I only add people I personally know on social media, but he adds just everyone so

[Chanel1981]

Maybe you're misreading the signals?

[Asker]

how would you interpret the signs like prolonged eye contact, not looking away when I catch him, checking me out publicly and staring from a distance?

[Chanel1981]

Maybe he's a player, tough to say. Does go out of his way to talk to you?

[Floorks]

He doesn't want you to see what's on his profile.

[Asker]

Why? Why would he let other people he doesn't talk to see his profile but not me?

[Floorks]

If he likes you, he wouldn't want you seeing creepy shit on his profile because he's afraid he'd loose interest, where as when he's with friends, I feel like he can explain himself better

[DESTROY]

then I guess removing account is the best way not to make people see your profile

[Anonymous]

I don't allow any FWBs to see my social media.

[Asker]

What's fwb? And why not?

[Opinion Owner]

FWB=Friends With Benefits. I keep them off of there because I need to keep some separation between my personal life and my dalliances.

[Asker]

No, there's no way for us to be friends with benefits, I don't ever do that. But what if he was romantically interested? Still no adding me on social media?

[Opinion Owner]

He might still want to keep us separation between his regular friends and his girlfriend. He doesn't want worlds to collide

[shadowpawns]

honestly probably doesn't want someone knowing

[jesusjones]

he has a girlfriend

[Asker]

no he doesn't

[jesusjones]

keep telling yourself that sweetheart. he won't add you on social media because she will find out

[Asker]

oh myyy you don't have to be this presumptuous. I know for sure that he's single, I have good sources. besides he adds tonns of girls he doesn't speak to on social media but me. I'm sure his "girlfriend" would be mad about that too if she actually existed.