Every time he talks to me he asks why I haven’t texted him?

[Anonymous]

I’ve been talking to this guy for a month. We talk everyday, and if not everyday, every other day. When he messages me he always asks me why have I stopped talking to him, why I didn’t say good morning to him, if I’m playing games etc. in a joking manner, not in a mean way.

Im not the clingy type. I let him come to me. Is what he’s showing a red flag? Or is it because he’s interested?

Updates

+1 y

**and just for added detail, he’s 33.

[PrettyPriya]

Well, he is certainly interested in you. Maybe a bit too much too soon it seems. He sounds very clingy and insecure. The fact that he is constantly worried why you are not in constant communication would be somewhat of a red flag for me.

That sort of behaviour is likely not going to change and he will need constant validation that you are still "there" for him. I doubt this is the first time he has acted like this in a relationship either.

Now, I wouldn't go as far to say completely dump the guy, but you need to communicate to him that he doesn't have anything to worry about. Just tell him that you cannot be texting and talking all the time.

Let him know that you have a life (job/school/family/friends/etc) and that just because you don't instantly reply or always message him all day long doesn't mean anything. It just means you are busy and when you have time, you will talk to him.

Sounds like you already talk quite a bit. That is why I would be a bit concerned about the way he is so worried.

[Asker]

Yeah I definitely have to bring it up to him. I enjoy talking to him but just like he is busy, im busy too and sometimes I just don’t have the energy to talk.

[PrettyPriya]

I completely understand what you are saying. We all have lives and things to do. He needs to just get it that while you like chatting with him, when you don't, it isn't because of something he did or a change of heart.

Your concern is valid. Hopefully, he can understand this and put aside those fears rather than smothering you like you have to be in constant contact all the time. Best of luck to you and thanks for the reply.

[Asker]

And thank you for your advice 😊

[Anonymous]

you can be honest with him. You can tell him that just because you don't text him often doesn't mean that you are playing games. You get exhausted after work and need some time for yourself as well.

[Crafteroon]

So you've been talking to him almost daily for a month. Considering he mentions it, I'm guessing he is the one always initiating the conversations? And you still wonder why he feels the interest is one-sided?

Make an effort, start talking to him first, don't be so passive, and see if his "clingyness" disappears.

[Asker]

Yeah I definitely will.

[Guy13]

YOu have been talking to this guy a month and he has not asked you out. I can't believe you hung in that long. Are you long-distance?

[Asker]

No, he has asked me out many times, but we both have very busy jobs and it’s been hard to find a time that works, where we’re both not exhausted. I actually met him because he was building the store next to where I work.

[Guy13]

Gotcha... a contractor. That would be handy to have around ;-) I am a landlord is where that came from Internationally. Well damn, make it happen is all I have to say. He seems a little insecure. Is that fair to say?

[Asker]

Fair to say lol

[Guy13]

There is something cute about this... kind of like a carnival/circus. I have had enough of the BS though. Your drop-dead date to finish this JOB is 8/20. If you both are unable to close this out on that day THEN IT IS OVER. I may be better suited for you anyway ;-)

[JPresidente]

This guy sounds a bit clingy and not very experienced with relationships and probably lacks self confidence.

[Asker]

This could be it. Lol

[JPresidente]

Yep. You may want to tell him in a lighthearted manner that we don't need to communicate that often to have a relationship.