Why do some people hate being told young men/boys are being taken advantage of or exploited?

[Mamasanma]

I met some men who for example get angry at me for saying boys get taken advantage of by older women because they would have enjoyed it.

I think it's disturbing some men don't grow up and stay like a child.

[GreekLorrd]

There could be several reasons why some people react negatively when they hear about young men or boys being taken advantage of or exploited. One possible reason is that they may have experienced similar situations themselves and are uncomfortable acknowledging the pain and trauma associated with it. They may also feel threatened by the idea that men can be victims of sexual abuse or exploitation, which challenges traditional gender norms and stereotypes.

Another reason could be related to social conditioning and cultural attitudes towards masculinity. Society often reinforces the idea that men should be dominant, strong, and in control, while vulnerability and submission are viewed as feminine traits. When young men or boys are taken advantage of or exploited, it may challenge these traditional gender roles and make some people feel uncomfortable or confused.

It is essential to recognize that anyone can be a victim of sexual abuse or exploitation, regardless of gender, age, or other factors. We need to create safe spaces for victims to come forward and receive support and care. We also need to challenge harmful attitudes and beliefs about gender that can contribute to perpetuating these crimes.

[Mamasanma]

It's not that they don't understand that boys get exploited but that they think if it's consensual it's fine. They can't see how it's exploitation.

[GreekLorrd]

It's important to understand that even if something is consensual, it can still be exploitation, especially if there is a significant power imbalance between the individuals involved. For example, a young boy may feel pressured to engage in sexual activity with an older woman because he wants to please her or because he feels like he should be grateful for the attention. However, this does not make the situation any less exploitative or potentially harmful for the boy. It's important to educate people about the dynamics of power and consent, and to work towards creating a society where individuals are empowered to make their own choices free from coercion and manipulation.

[Greenbins]

Because some people can't handle the truth.

[NamerOfStars]

They've accepted, on a very deep level, that males can't be victims of female sexual aggression. It's sexist against both men AND women, but few people seem to care.

That, and accepting that consent does eliminate a moral violation means admitting that it be kinda murky; it's not always black and white. People don't like ambiguity, unless it directly benefits them at the time. The fact that so many laws don't codify that- you'll see degrees of murder, of assault, of fraud in some places, even of Kevin Bacon, but not of sexual assault ANYWHERE that I'm aware of- is mystifying. It's either tolerated or all lumped together, as though waking your spouse with a kiss were no different from leaping out from an alleyway and raping a stranger.

[Mamasanma]

Such delusion

[NamerOfStars]

It's not delusion; it's denial. Push them on it, and you'll see the cracks start to appear as the dissonance grows stronger. Do be careful, though; more than one has taken a swing at me when I've forced them to confront it.

[Mamasanma]

What happened, tell me

[Reddy4it]

I think because it’s what the boys would’ve enjoyed…my boyfriend had his first experience at 15…just coz he enjoyed it, doesn’t make it right…if I was given weed at 12 and loved it, does that make it a positive thing…? No…because it’s harmful still and shapes a psyche of a person…

[Mamasanma]

Exactly, it doesn't make the adult any better.

I don't understand this logic if they enjoyed it it's no big deal

[Reddy4it]

And my boyfriend is like…no regrets…I’d do it again…but he doesn’t see that he was a victim…and that’s an issue…

[Mamasanma]

Yes, a big issue

[Mamasanma]

What did you do about it?

[Reddy4it]

…I feel helpless to help in that regard…

[DamianTheSmikkelbeer]

@Reddy4it Not much to do in that regard anyway, most boys have fantasies about banging women and when it actually happens they usually like the experience or in some cases they hate it and wished they had done it with a girl they really could’ve connected with.

[Reddy4it]

@DamianTheSmikkelbeer it was kinda like that for him…but coached, if that makes sense

[DamianTheSmikkelbeer]

@Reddy4it Yeah we’re kinda messed up in that way really, it’s best to forget and stop trying to fix his way of thinking. Probably isn’t going to change now or ever perhaps, sure some guys despise this and think it’s wrong but deep-down most straight males have boyish teenage fantasies about tapping a grown-ass woman and if a opportunity presented itself it probably would be a yes. I’ve had these fantasies myself when i was a kid, i’ve never actually done it with one as a kid because i’ve never been that reckless but if you’re straight you’ve definitely had wet-dreams about it and if you’ve had any luck there’s been a attractive female-teacher who’s definitely grabbed your attention. I myself do fall for older women now, or it’s just more mature-women i look for i can’t tell really anymore. I strongly feel divorced from females around my age-group and it sucks, i find them physically attractive very much but the way they think and how they behave is a massive-turn off. Males are just weird with these kinda things, don’t think too much with it is better for you

[Lenanolena]

@DamianTheSmikkelbeer it's not "most" boys but lot do yes. And it would depend on the woman, most boys want a hot woman, if she isn't there's a lesser chance they would have sex with her. What you are thinking of are women in their 40s or so and most boys wouldn't have sex with such women at that age so you are in the minority here unless she's really hot.

And girls are the same, many desire hot older men. I did and so did my friends.

[Luffy1990]

It’s willful ignorance. They don’t understand that women can take advantage of men. It’s a surprising fact that men and women can take advantage of each other unknowingly. Women however use their body and minds to take advantage of men (they even use feminism to accomplish that ). I can sense that there there is a struggle for power and control both men and women take advantage of that. I just want a world that I can live without worrying someone trying to take advantage of me (instead of accepting me the way I am , understanding me , and i will do that in return). Too much stuff happened like the me too movement.

[Sour-rose]

they don't believe it? And now you got them thinking about the reality of it, and got them doubting their childhood?

[Mamasanma]

I like your answer

[Sour-rose]

Gehehehe, thanks <3

[Nightmoon83]

While that may be true for some men and they may actually like it if an older women was to have sex with them. But we need to make sure that they know it’s children and it’s still wrong and not all men or boys will be thinking like that

[Mamasanma]

So you think if they like it they are not taken advantage of or exploited?

[Nightmoon83]

No you can like it or think it feels good that doesn’t mean they aren’t getting taken advantage of. However there are differences that can be had here and that’s the concent age which is 16 where I’m from and if an older woman is wanting to have sex with a 16 year old as long as he says it’s ok then it’s fine

[Mamasanma]

How is it any different if it's legal?

[Mamasanma]

They are still kids

[MementoMori777]

They don't seem to like that men get victimized I guess, mostly because most men have the mentality that sex isn't being taken advantage of, it's a good thing, even at a young age I guess, if I told you I knew, I'd be lying

[Tonitos]

How do some people hate being told young men/boys are being exploited? Well because since a kid turns into an adult, he is responsible for his own life. Animals might be exploited but men I don't think so since they got a mind to reason. so I hate it when someone tells me that he was exploited by a woman. I told him, No! you weren't, it's just women's nature and you didn't pay attention to it.

[Mamasanma]

I am talking about boys not men

[Mamasanma]

And it's women's nature to exploit men? I never heard of that.

[Tonitos]

Return to the story of Adam and Eve! Eve used the concept of love and made Adam take a bite from a forbidden fruit. am I wrong?

[Mamasanma]

You have mental problems

[Tonitos]

The biggest mental thing is even God didn't blame Eve, he only hold Adam countable for it. then sent them both. that is proof that women are excused and will never be punished while being in a relationship.

[Mamasanma]

You have serious issues

[Tonitos]

Unfortunately, after reviewing things bit by bit, Yes I agree men shouldn't encourage female sexual desire in kids who are not adults. but again, I feel kind of was right too! but again! you won the discussion.

[Mamasanma]

They don't encourage it but they get mad when people say boys are taken advantage of because they like it.

That's the whole question that they are still taking advantage of them

[Tonitos]

here we go again you are confusing me once again!

[Mamasanma]

Uh how?

[Tonitos]

you are half right

[Mamasanma]

How?

[Tonitos]

You know what you are 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% right

[Mamasanma]

Wtf are you doing

[Mamasanma]

What am I?

[Mamasanma]

You seem to be projecting

[Tonitos]

they get mad when people say boys are taken advantage of because they like it. I agree with you definitely

[Mamasanma]

So you agree they are wrong for getting mad and silly? Why?

[Tonitos]

oh, Jesus! why because you said so, I believe you

[Mamasanma]

Lol why do you just agree?
You clearly agree with those men

[Tonitos]

that's another question!

[Mamasanma]

Of course it is because you are just like them.

[Tonitos]

i am not

[Mamasanma]

So you don't like those men?

[Tonitos]

I don't like those men

[EpicSnail]

Both can be true. I bet in some cases the boy is equally or more into it, just like some young women flirt heavily with older men. But equally it can be uncomfortable and also violates social norms, so embarrassing for the boys involved.

[Mamasanma]

For the girls too but I think that's not the main issue here

[EpicSnail]

What do you think the main issue is?

[Mamasanma]

Obviously that an adult is exploiting or taking advantage of the kid and some idiots get angry and try to defend the sick woman

[mstbooblover]

This is certainly worth to ponder, but still case sensitive. There's as often with this kind of topic no black or white answer.

[Mamasanma]

It IS black and white. It's wrong always taking advantage from the adult side regardless if the kid enjoyed it. They are too young to know what they are doing.

there's nothing to discuss.

[mstbooblover]

Sorry, but I do not agree. The truth is nearly never black or white, certainly not in these matters. I'm not interested in the legal aspect, only in the human one. Probably you will not really understand, but out of something bad, some good may evolve, which is rather hard to accept, I know... No offense meant.

[Mamasanma]

Oh please you wouldn't say this shit if it was some girl getting preyed on by a man.

You're just talking crap.

[mstbooblover]

A difficult topic in any case. I'm not interested in starting a polemic. Best wishes.

[Mamasanma]

Bye...

[DarkLegacy]

Because they are sexist hypocrites, usually women with a victim mentality.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Haters gonna hate. They assume the world revolves around them and they know more than they really do.

[David4358]

It all depends on how old the boy in question is and if he was ready for sex or not.

[Mamasanma]

No minor is ready and unless he initiated it it's exploitation from the womans side

[David4358]

Humans have been having sex when they where teenages for 1000s of years so not sure I agree that a teen won't be ready for sex. Some won't for sure, but most probably are.
When did you lose your virginity?
My first sexual experience was when I was 14, touched my first boob and it was marvelous!
Got a hj a month or so after that..
Lost my virginity at 16..
I would imagine most people start having sex in their teens because that's what biology has designed us to do

[Mamasanma]

Does matter. Teens are immature and naive. The adult woman is taking advantage of that in this case.

[Mamasanma]

Let alone they are a huge pervert

[David4358]

Maybe so but being immature hasn't stopped teens from having sex.. when did you first have sex?

[Mamasanma]

Doesn't matter you are comparing two kids having sex to a kid having sex with a mature adult, they are not on par with each other, huge difference

[David4358]

Why though? If a person is old enough to consent to sex why would it matter how old the person they have sex with is? As long as both people are old enough to consent then who are you to decide who someone else should have sex with?

[Mamasanma]

You make no sense. You are comparing a child to a sexual predator.

[Mamasanma]

What's wrong with you

[David4358]

I'm not talking about a child I'm talking about 2 people that are old enough to consent to sex. Which is why I said in the beginning it depends on how old we are talking

[Mamasanma]

No you are saying its the same for two kids to have sex as it Is for a old ass pervert to prey on a kid.

You are messed up.

[David4358]

I'm not talking kids, I'm talking teens that are old enough to consent to sex

[Mamasanma]

Still kids

[David4358]

Physiologists and the law said otherwise

[Mamasanma]

Society too

[berisky23]

They are idiots and have insecure masculinity

[Mamasanma]

Toxic masculinity yes

[Anonymous]

Bc it’s rare to have female sex abusers in the first place and the times it does happen the boys seemed to have enjoyed themselves.

[Mamasanma]

It's not rare, it's just just not covered or reported as much as if it was a man.

What does enjoyment have to do with it? That's such a dumb way to think about it.

[riverrat3]

Has someone taken advantage of any young man you know

[FunkyMonkee]

Have you ever seen, "Summer Of `42"?

[FunkyMonkee]

Or, "The Graduate"?

[Mamasanma]

I think so. Why?

[FunkyMonkee]

Similar situations.

[Mamasanma]

How do you know that?

Most of the time it's the woman going after the boy. And the woman in summer of 42 should have known better, she was a sex predator.

This is exactly what I am talking about in my question

[FunkyMonkee]

No, she wasn't! The boy wanted her! She only fucked him because she'd just found out that her hubby was killed in the war! She needed companionship and compassion. He happened to be there and was willing to give it to her. Other than a letter, did she have any further contact with him, NO!! I just saw the movie 2 months ago!

[Mamasanma]

So using a kid because you are lonely is OK?

Yup you sound like a pedo here

[FunkyMonkee]

HE WANTED IT!!! GET IT?

[Mamasanma]

So do many girls, GET IT?

[FunkyMonkee]

So, what's your point?

[Mamasanma]

You are just hating on men who do it with younger people but not women because you have a bias and like female pedophiles.

[Mamasanma]

They get all exploited and taken advantage of, get it?

[Mansearching]

@mamasanma @FunkyMonkee Regardless of which is older, they should know better if they are taking advantage of the younger one. The younger may not know. But but but, in Summer of 42, the younger took advantage of the older. He knew it, but she eas so emotionally f-ed up she probably didn't know what was going on. Nevertheless it was wrong.

[Mamasanma]

@Mansearching she did know.

And that's my point. If the woman is seducing him she's taking advantage of him even if he wanted it. Same as if it was a girl

[Mansearching]

As i saw it he was doing same. Unless i saw different movie. But he shouldn't have taken advantage of the emotional destrot woman. She shouldn't have let her emotions control situation.

[Mamasanma]

@Mansearching my point is if the boy is being seduced it doesn't matter if he enjoys it or wants it. It's exploitation and taking advantage of him.

And I wonder if it was a mentally destroyed man what you would say

[Mansearching]

Truthfully they both are at fault. Listen to That Summer by Garth Brooks. Same scenario. Older woman younger guy. I don't think either would be mentaly messed up, emotionally probably. But they'll get over it and move on. I know I did. Had older girlfriend b4 mine now. The old girlfriend f-ed me up for a little bit, then got back on saddle and got another girlfriend.

[Mamasanma]

@Mansearching enough with that stupid movie, I am not talking about it anymore. And you are comparing an adult with a kid. That makes no sense

[FunkyMonkee]

@Mansearching No, she just needed someone to be close with. If anything, she "used" him as a surrogate of her hubby. Most likely, in her mind, she was pretending Oscy WAS her hubby and this was her goodbye fuck to him by way of this other guy.

[Mamasanma]

So she was in the wrong and used him. That means she exploited him. No different than if it was a man.

Stop defending pedos. It's gross.

[FunkyMonkee]

@Mansearching All through the movie, he was enamoured with her and wanted her. He didn't take advantage of her,. She WAS distraught but, it was pretty obvious he was only trying to comfort her in her time of sadness. It just went farther than either of them originally expected.

[Mansearching]

I don't. We discuss and see if we agree or not.

[mommymommymommy]

Accepting reality

[Mamasanma]

What do you mean

[mommymommymommy]

It's hard to accept reality sometimes