Why does he video call me just to fall asleep?

[nikkihxc]

I’ve been talking to this guy (who is ridiculously Christian), and every single night he calls me just to fall asleep on the phone. This is the same guy who randomly tells me how he just wants to be friends all the time. We could be talking about the weather and then he’s like I don’t think I want a girlfriend. Completely out of nowhere. He’s just really confusing me. And if we aren’t video chatting when he falls asleep he will call me in the middle of the night just so we can sleep. What is his deal? Keep in mind I’ve never mentioned anything about being in a relationship either. #sagittariushelp

Updates

1 mo

I guess I should’ve been more specific. He calls me while he’s at work and we literally just sit on the phone. I work from home so it’s not a big deal for me but he’s working in a factory setting. And once he gets home he hops on video- spends his entire night on the phone with me. Things aren’t exactly black and white with us. He’s extremely Christian, and we’ve taken our video calls further than we should have. One minute he’s talking marriage and the next he just wants to be friends.

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, that dude is sending some mixed signals for sure! Here's what I think might be going on:

- He finds you really chill and relaxing to be on the phone with, so it helps him sleep. Guys do be bad at expressing their feels though.

- Maybe deep down he likes you as more than a friend but is scared to admit that cause of his religious beliefs or something. So he backtracks.

- Or could be he just likes the attention and comfort of having you there while he sleeps without committing to anything serious. Kinda stringing you along.

- Def keep your guard up if he's constantly going hot/cold on you about being friends vs more. That's immature and will mess with your head after awhile.

- I'd try having a straight up convo asking what's really up and what he wants long term. You deserve clarity, sis!

Don't let him just use you for emotional attention whenever it's convenient. Set some boundaries or you may end up getting hurt if he never steps it up. Keep me posted!

[SolivagantRises]

I think that he is just fond of you and has a liking towards you. But he also doesn't want a relationship. It doesn't mean that he cannot develop a certain kind of likeness towards you. I also think that he is uncertain of how he is feeling.

[SolivagantRises]

@nikkihxc Since you updated with more details. He is definitely fond of you and likes you. But it doesn't mean that he may have romantic feelings for you. He may still be uncertain of how he feels. The question is whether you like him that way or not. I would give him more time if you want it to change to something more. Since he clearly doesn't wanna be in a relationship. Guys can be stubborn like that and still be able to like someone.

[_Maya_]

Well at first glance it seems like he wants to talk but then gets tired. The intention there might be good but then he just runs out of steam. As far as stating he doesn't want a girlfriend... maybe he doesn't. Maybe he thinks you want a relationship with him. I know you said that you have never mentioned it but that doesn't mean he isn't getting that vibe for whatever reason. Sounds like he looks at you as just a friend. Since it seems you have no interest in a relationship with him either I'm not sure what the issue is. Sounds like you both just want to be friends. Not entirely sure how that is confusing unless you aren't being forthcoming with how you really feel about him.

[didichi]

I had a similar experience. I use to fall asleep on the phone with my online friend after we game together or watch anime. I remember when we first called he got so sleepy and was kinda sleep talking/ flirting with me in his sleep voice. We don’t do it anymore but he use to fall asleep right away when we were talking on the phone late at night. Sometimes we bring it up and tell each other how cringe it was to be falling asleep on the phone together lol. I just think you make him comfortable which makes him fall asleep fast.

[laly520]

maybe he wants to talk but then gets sleepy

n its clearly enough he is only looking for friendship

[Stacy0706]

Maybe he like To fall sleep to the sound of your voice.