Guys, Do you think your girlfriend/fiancée is pretty just because you're not a compliment person?

[Anonymous]

Okay. So the question is quite clear. Guys who don't compliment their girls as much, do you still have a voice or vision in your heads that you find them good looking? My own man is confusing me. He does everything for me just like how I do for him. Also I compliment him daily, sometimes every damn hour when I'm really fond of him. How do I say this without sounding smug or b*tchy. I'm not ugly, okay? I'm a part time model for a photography school. That's it, I'm not bragging. Just to make it clear that he is not disgusted with me. So he doesn't really compliment me, I get a weekly 'you look good' or 'your makeup today is pretty' or 'i like your hair'. He wouldn't give me the same 'ahhww you're so beautiful' snuggling compliment I give him. And it's making me feel insecure. Yes. I talked to him about it. Yes. I asked him why. Yes, I repeated my request. Been together for 5 years and it haven't changed. Were both 26 and soon to be married. I get all these overbearing compliments from men, like 'you look like a porcelain doll', or 'you are annoyingly pretty, smart and easy to talk to, that's why your female colleagues hate you'. And I don't want their compliments, I don't need them, I only want my man's.

[Stevepro68]

Everyone is different. My girlfriend is by far the hottest woman I've been in a relationship with. I am in awe of her. That said she hates when I overly compliment her. To my best understanding after 4 years. She see her flaws way way more than I do. She knows intellectually that men find her attractive. She has to dress down in the gym or they won't leave her alone. Forget things like sundress or leggings. If I step away from her in a store guys are up her butt like hungry dogs. Yet when I compliment her she acts like I am not being truthful. She feels uncomfortable when I give her too many compliments. Or if I compliment her about something she doesn't like about her body but I do. I am certain at this point that I have the compliment system down for her. When she purposefully want to make my jaw drop and it does she is thrilled. When she gives me a little tease because she is feeling amorous and wants a physical response from me that she gets. She acts like those are honest representation of how attractive I find her to be. But if at dinner I look at her beautiful eyes and tell her so she gets twitchy like It's manipulative not complimentary. Even when I explain it to her and she believes me she admits that it is not easy to accept and feels fake to her. So maybe you are unknowingly sending him conflicting signals about compliments. In my experience most women do.

[Asker]

That is different, though. You would indeed compliment her, she is just not up for compliments. In my case, I would be up for compliments, because I am used to being complimented by people all the time—people I don't care about, so instead, I want it from him. Him not saying I'm pretty when I'm in a position I clearly know I'm pretty (let's go dramatic, a few days ago I was resting in bed, my hair was cure, my face flawless and the rising sun was streaming in right at my face. Just like the portrait photos they take of me at the photography school. No word from him. Sometimes I feel like he gives no shit about appearance and it's annoying me to hell. It's like, my youth's beauty is wasted.

[Anonymous]

There’s a number of reasons men don’t always complement women. For one a lot of us don’t receive compliments growing up or even in adulthood. Two we don’t need compliments to feel special. Compliments are feeling based. Women tend to need their feelings validated a lot. Men not so much. You’re asking a men to do something that honestly doesn’t come natural to us. I e been w my girl for 17 years. No I don’t say much either in the way of compliments. I show it by what I do for her. Whether that’s getting her lunch on my way home. A gift. Taking her out, etc. A lot of times it’s just grabbing her and having my way w her.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't date someone I don't find attractive.

[jahaims]

Actions speak louder than words. You sound insecure.

[Asker]

Only in front of him. It that typical badass girl you can imagine. But yeah, when he doesn't compliment me, I feel insecure, like everyone else can appreciate my looks but not him?