Would you text a girl that you friendzoned multiple times every day?

[Anonymous]

Recently a guy that I was more than friendly with told me that he thought I was hot and enjoyed being friends but he couldn’t fully trust me. We weren’t talking much at that point, maybe once or twice a week mostly on weekends.

Since then I backed off a bit and I’ve noticed that he seems to be texting me more. Like 2-3x every day even during the workday when he used to never text me. Does it seem like he might be changing his mind?

Would you text a girl you were just friends with this often?:

Yeah, sounds normal.

No, probably he’s changing his mind about you.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

"he thought I was hot and enjoyed being friends but he couldn’t fully trust me"

You don't describe so called "friendzoning" here, you describe him stating that he is physically attracted and him stating that he doesn't trust you enough to form a relationship. Also, increasing frequency in communication is usually an expected sign of romantic interest, of desire, in the broad sense.

But nothing I say really matters. What matters is knowing what he means precisely when he said "couldn't fully trust you", and you will get that information by asking him, not us...

[Asker]

@maybe_maybe_not yeah I know what it’s about but chose not to include it here!

You don’t think him saying he thinks I’m hot is sort of a way of letting me down easy after we had so many very intimate sexual conversations?

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

I can't really tell anything of interest about him without understanding at least a little who he is, who are you as well as this dynamic between the two of you

[Angelo75]

You could test by pulling away a little. Responding a little slower and see if he gets drawn into you. If so, the there's a big chance he's into you.

The other option (which would actually be very mean) is to show a little interest in another male friend and see if he stays normal or if he starts showing jealousy signs. But this is a bit of a mean approach.

[Asker]

@angelo75 I started pulling away a bit and I’ve definitely noticed him being more engaged since then. But he’s still hesitant to talk about anything sexual 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Angelo75]

But u want sex or a relationship out of this whole thing?

[Screenwriter]

None of it sounds normal. Sounds like game playing. When you back off, he shows more interest. When you're interested, he backs off.

This is someone looking for entertainment when HE feels like it, on HIS terms. He hasn't changed his mind. He's going to do the same thing again when you show interest again.

Find someone who is as interested in you as you are in him. This guy isn't that person.

[DishLady]

Would *I*? No. Would a guy who has some odd hybrid attachment glitch do it? Sure, but if he's TOLD YOU that you're in the friend zone then take that at face value and don't get your hopes up.

[Asker]

@dishlady yeah I’ve been thinking it could be an attachment thing. He said he still thinks I’m hot and enjoys being my friend I don't know how to take that?

[DishLady]

Back away gradually otherwise you’ll never be rid of him.

[236color]

Guys genuinely don't "friend zone" in the way women do them. They don't do this for a couple of reasons. First we are too direct in our communication to put it off. Women keep I guy hanging around by making him think his persistence will be rewarded, (it won't). Second women won't put up with being treated like that. I don't know what's happening in your case, but it's NOT the friend zone.

[ProbablyClueless]

Well... no, I wouldn't. I don't have anyone I particularly enjoy talking with that often. Not even women I'm romantically interested in.

But in your situation, he's made it very clear to you that he doesn't see you as a friend. Friends don't call friends "hot."

[Jove79]

If he friendzoned you.. and you don’t like talking to him because of it. Stop talking to him. What if he just wants someone to talk to? A friend? What if he likes you just as a friend.


If you enjoy his personality, and you can’t be friends with him only, it would probably be a good idea to bring it to his attention nice and bold. Tell him you either meet up and spend time with each other, or you don’t want anything to do with him, and he’s wasting your time.

[RandomUser1000]

Maybe

If we are good friends
If we have enough things to talk about
If I have the time

Then it's possible.

[Asker]

@randomuser1000 what if you never met due to distance?

[RandomUser1000]

@septemberintherain

If there is a person you like, romanticly or good friend, it's more fun to meet them IRL then only digitally if you can.
But it's still possible to having meaningful conversations over a distance.
It's still possible to share laughs and ups and downs and give each other support and advice over a distance.
It's not the same as meeting between four eyes. But it still can be meaningful.

But then you can probably only be friends.
Like long distance relationship and so, it can work for a while, but probably not for years and years if you are not able to meet at least once in a while.

[ohsheeT]

If I'm texting with a girl 2. 3. 4 times a day it's because I like her there are no titles given there are no games and she going to know it there will be know guessing for her. It's cut and dry that way no one waisting each other's time it seems like there are to many games and leading people on.. why. ? Real friends don't even do that

[Anonymous]

He wants you to stop backing off and start hooking up with him again, but he still doesn’t want a relationship. The trust thing is just an excuse.

[Asker]

But he doesn’t want to talk sex. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Opinion Owner]

That is weird. In that case he might really just want to be friends.

[Asker]

Could be! Would you mind dming me? I want to tell you some more details about the situation!

[Babygirl_S]

I also have to friend zone many girls because they just want a piece of me. They flip out when I friend zone them

[Asker]

@babygirl_s so you think it might be a test?

[Babygirl_S]

Testing my sexual orientation

[katiesmuff]

Really not anywhere near enough information to give you any litgimate advice with him. Just be cautious moving forward!

[Nikki1989]

There are no zones, never was. You are either friends or not, and the fact it is just texting indicates he can't be too serious about you.

[Anonymous]

That depends. Did I KNOW I friendzoned her? Women are not very OBVIOUS about their interest most of the time. In my younger days, I probably did a couple of times unknowingly. But as I've gotten older, I've tried to be more mindful i am still capable of missing signs though. But no, I would never do it deliberately.

[WonderingManII]

No, but I could see myself doing that if I was chronically lonely.

[midnightmoon05]

It’s LD?

call to find out.
text guessing games is no fun.

[spartan55]

You already posted this... what is wrong with you crazy pink anons...🙄

[Godihateyou]

I texted a girl I friend zoned multiple times a day for 20 years. It was only when I told her I wanted to leave my wife after a six year emotional affair that she just disappeared. Never let these whores out of the friend zone

[Anonymous]

Maybe he actually changed his mind about you.

[nawtee_me]

Doesn’t everyone text their friends more than their relationships?

[Panthero80]

If you are good friends with her you might.

[Asker]

@panthero80 we haven’t met yet he lives far away

[WhiteThought]

Might have put you in the Sex-Only zone.

[Asker]

@whitethought but he doesn’t want to talk sex.

[PaleDale]

Nope

[Asker]

@paledale no he’s not changing his mind or no it’s not normal?

[PaleDale]

It's not normal, so yes he's changing his mind 🙂

[hello4433]

Sounds like he just wants to get in your pants

[Asker]

@hello4433 he doesn’t though cuz he doesn’t want to talk sex.

[seeyounexttuesday]

Nah, he's stupid.

[Blackcat1952]

Why bother flower Just get a hooker

[eagle1951]

probably not