Even after shitting my fart smells bad. What should I do?

[Bloopbloopbloop]

[BoobSlayer]

After one boobilicious adventure with a voluptous goddess, Boobslayer said: "Booba smalla that shiznit off these puzzy walls to his heartthrob: milk'em mamma jama lumber yanga juzt hurrrts so oohg good - - his cum-dicked lays of the day will give the melody of sweet-creams showts be com'n off sweet kitson nuts lol wuts about ta explod lol dam yo it do mamma."

Translation: I just took a massive shit and my fart still smells bad.

She said "That cum is bad-stinking but I be enjoying cum-fest each nights of wild boob-tide gawwdama!"

You can imagine the horror cock, when the boob goddess thought Boobslayer's cum smelled like shit. Boobslayer agonized over his own putrid pungency: "How can he enjoy these scrumptious treasures without leaving a stench that would have any woman, even his Cousin Stacey running for the hills?"

Only time will tell if Boobslayer will find the right balance between his insatiable desire for breastical bliss and the unfortunate consequences of his own malodorous fart.

[BoobSlayer]

It's a delicate dance, one that Boobslayer struggles with daily, while always keeping in mind the value and importance of boobs in his life.

[RoοstеrBrеаst]

The other fucker quoted fucking Cleveland steamer clinic to try taking my MHO.

[BoobSlayer]

He's secretly wishing to wake up with a steamy one on his chest.

[BoopBoopBeep]

First off, are we related?

Secondly, according to the Cleveland Clinic, these hard to digest foods result in smellier flatulence:

Dairy products like cow’s milk, cheese, yogurt, ice cream and coffee creamers.
Starchy foods like wheat, corn and potatoes.
Cruciferous vegetables like Brussels sprouts, broccoli and cabbage.
High-sulfur foods like onions, garlic and leeks.
Foods containing sugar alcohols like sorbitol, xylitol and erythritol.

I don't actually have that problem, but this is what I turned up. Now that said, I eat a ton of greek yogurt, garlic and potatoes so I don't know about that. I also eat a lot of beans but I presoak them significantly (16-24 hours) first so that takes care of much of their problems. I don't eat a bunch of processed crap or artificial sweeteners though, so I suspect that helps.

They also said this which I find interesting:

"On average, it’s normal to fart between 14 and 23 times throughout your day, often without attracting much notice."

I'd be surprised if I hit five on a normal day. If I'm scarfing down breakfast because I'm late for a race and get a lot of air in my stomach as a result I could see it being more, but wow 23? So, nearly once an hour? How?

Guess the long and short of it is look at how you're eating and what you're eating and see if that offers any room for change. Methane is a component of flatulence though, and that's never going to smell like roses, so the issue is are you cranking out 2% methane or 85% methane? (I made up those numbers, but you get the idea)

[RoοstеrBrеаst]

Well, first of all, let's not forget that farts can sometimes smell a bit off, especially after a meal with certain ingredients. But don't worry, there are ways to make it smell better. Here's a little guide to help you out:

• First, find a nice, clean horror cock to sniff. The bigger and more twisted, the better. This will help mask the smell of your fart and make it more appealing to your friends.
• As you're sniffing the horror cock, imagine it's a giant, throbbing biodildo that's about to pleasure you to death. This will help you get in the mood and make the experience more enjoyable.
• Once you've sufficiently enjoyed the scent of the horror cock, gently rub it against your fart. This will help spread the scent and make it smell more like the horror cock you've just been sniffing.
• Now, imagine that your fart is a beautiful, succulent fruit that the horror cock is about to devour. As the horror cock feasts on your fart, it will become more and more aroused, filling you with its hot, sticky cum.
• Finally, let out a deep, demonic laugh as you revel in the knowledge that your fart now smells like a horror cock's favorite snack. This will not only make you feel more confident, but it will also make your friends question their own fart-sniffing abilities.

So, there you have it, a fucking guide to making your fart smell better. Enjoy the unholy pleasures of the horror cocks, and never be ashamed of your and @BoobSlayer's fart again!

[Pοrnytail]

that is @boobslayer's pet horror cock eating her fart.

[bowenw]

Evaluate what you are eating. Some foods just seem to cause bad smells, like onions.

This site has more detail:
https://www.thrillist.com/health/nation/foods-make-your-farts-smell-bad-stink-gas

[LiamJHayden]

Change your diet. Some food are naturally odiferous. Some do not agree with certain people. Eliminate one food type at a time and see what happens.

[tfan1]

Hmm your butt is telling you there’s more to come out and possible lower the amount of dairy or beans 👍🙂

[Sunnybeach123]

I also have smelly farts, even after I have a large shit. I think it's like that for a lot of people.

[mobiusforniner]

Since when does shitting make farts smell less? Am i missing something here?

[exitseven]

Try one of these.

[Anonymous]

Screw the spray top off a Febreze put bottle into you ass while doing a handstand

[leahzrc]

pray to the fart gods

[Anonymous]

Apply some chocolate in crack

[ejx629]

Stop farting after shitting.

[DummyThiccFeraligatr]

Eat more fiber, and lay off the broccoli!

[Celticwolf78]

Change your diet and watch the things you eat

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Eat better

[Wonderingguyy]

Not smell it lmaoo

[Jmmmfi4]

Girls do neither of these things

[Anonymous]

Enjoy the smell