Do you want to get Married?

Question

nightdrot · Accepted Answer

My girlfriend and I have been together for 12 years, lived together for 10, and have three children together - ages 7, 6 and 4. The first two were unplanned pregnancies.

We have no desire to be married. We think what we have is natural and beautiful and would be diminished by a silly ceremony and an expensive ring.

For anyone for whom marriage is a religious sacrament, I have nothing but respect. However, as to the rest, marriage licenses are a dime a dozen. They had them out like candy.

Besides, anyone who need a permission slip from the state - the only "contract" that government, since no fault divorce, will NOT enforce - to make their relationship mean something probably has bigger problems with the relationship than they realize. It is a useless piece of paper that mostly gives the government standing to adjudicate property and visitation rights when a couple's eternal love is not eternal anymore.

What my girlfriend and I have is beautiful and frankly we are more devoted to each other than half of the married couples we know. Frankly, except in a religious context, at this point it is meaningless.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It switches between "I'm ready" "Eventually, but not yet," and "I don't know."

Most of the time, I feel ready, except I'm no where near having a girlfriend. I'm emotionally ready.

Seeing work as it is (finances), I'm probably a few years out from marriage. The "I don't know" comes from seeing a lot of crummy, unhappy relationships. IF they stick together, it's unhappy and both are mean to each other. The anecdotes about what happens to guys (or especially fathers) in divorce scares the crap out of me. And knowing how things have gone in past relationships, I have no idea how it would last even a year, let alone for the rest of our lives.

PeekABooItsMe · Accepted Answer

Yes i do. I don't see it as a "must do" because i don't need paper telling me that my Husband and I are loyal to eachother. But i love the idea of a wedding and the happiness that would be there. I'm certainly not ready for marriage yet as i'm only 20. I have a fair few years before marriage is on the plate.

Comawhite666 · Accepted Answer

I desperately want to and even though I haven't been with my boyfriend that long in the grand scheme of things, I know I am totally ready and want to be 100% committed and together.

loveisbeautiful · Accepted Answer

Yes, but just because I want to doesn't mean it will happen.

DanishSaint · Answer

Since I kinda alreasy have been married (past tense, sadly) and since I always said I only get married once, cause that is for life- sadly, I didn't get to make that final decision regarding that- then no; I was married, I failed - never again!

Unless, of course, its to Emma Watson!! :)

Chaz269 · Answer

Marriage is a sham. If you need a license from the government and meaningless jewelry that's neither rare nor valuable to symbolize your love and commitment, you're a mindless meat puppet of capitalism and if you do ever get married, the relationship is doomed.

Highlander01 · Answer

I voted "I don't know" but I'm actually leaning towards "no".

I believe that marriage must be the result of a very well-thought-out decision. A failed marriage can ruin not only the life of the couple, but also that of their children and families. I believe it's safer to live in a relationship without actual marriage.

Anonymous · Answer

I with the girls, I don’t believe the girls comments, yes, they do want to get married but they don’t “just want to get married” as it has to be right, it has to make sense, and feel right, according to them, but I don’t believe for a second that any “simply don’t want to get married or indifferent about it”

CT_CD · Answer

I'm already married.

Logorithim · Answer

I'm currently extricating myself from a marriage, so I don't really have any appetite for thinking about another one, much less actually doing it. I wish those considering it or about to take the plunge, all the best, though.

JimRSmith · Answer

Yes, and will (hopefully!) be taking concrete steps in that direction in about a week...

DizzyDesii · Answer

Yes :) my boyfriend and i have been together a year. I've always wanted to marry after like 2 years of knowing someone. So he and i think we may be marrying around mid-late next year :D 🙌

karahiri · Answer

maybe. i'm getting an insane amount of pressure to find someone from my dad. he's usually SO chill about things like this. blah.

X1erra · Answer

A marriage requires full commitment to your mind, body, and soul. When I finally found the one, then I won't hesitate to marry to secure our love for each other and to gain our parents' full support towards our life goals. Bearing a child comes later. It's a commitment in itself, and I will take my time.

vertigobird · Answer

I'm definitely not ready to get married.

But I keep something in my mind my grandmother once told me about marriage and getting children:
It desn't matter what you think now. If you meet the right girl/guy you will change your mind.

lovebug093 · Answer

Yes I want to marry in the future. When the time is right.

azzntittiz · Answer

If he's rich and handsome, I'd let him ruin my body since he can pay for it and give me cute kids.  If that's what you're asking.

terincvd · Answer

If it happens it happens, I don't have any desire to get married but I also don't not (shit, double negative) want to get married.

BirdFly · Answer

Yeah, not because of having a wife but because I really want to be a dad for a little cute girl in the house. Little girls love me so much and I think I want that clean love everyday in my life. I always think I would be a great dad. But I don't know about being a good husband. I wish I could skip these years and go to the years I am married. Otherwise I feel like I won't be able to see a future.

2opaz · Answer

im ready

Revolver_ · Answer

Yes, i'm ready.

kaskas19 · Answer

I'm not sure. I don't see myself getting married. If I do I'll probably be cheated on, or soemthing bad will happen and I'll end up alone.

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

Yes, I do want to get married. And, yes, I also said "I DO!" already!

MsLoli · Answer

It would be a nice experience, I think, but it isn't a requirement.

Do you want to get Married?

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