How do I get a man to want to marry me and have children with me?

[Anonymous]

How do I get a man to want to marry me and have children with me like those plenty women I see on Youtube and Facebook, Instagram, etc FLAUNTING what they have finally. What are they doing that I am not? It's frustrating.

I am nearing my 40's and I haven't had any luck and I don't think it is my personality!

Updates

+1 y

God sometimes that is why I HATE G@G and the internet! They just chose the MHOs for me without my say! UGH!!!

I would NEVER have chosen those mean, judgmental answers that were chosen as MHO with the exception of BCRANGER10's answer omg!

[BCRanger10]

It's hard to tell without knowing anything about you personally.

However, based on what I've seen and heard in the culture, a lot of it has to do with our generation delaying making key life decisions for the sake of furthering their careers and education, things which are ordered towards the support of those life decisions, namely marriage and family. So there's that.

They've also grown up seeing their parents (and now even their grandparents) get divorced, so they're dealing with issues regarding personal formation, abandonment, mistrust, commitment, self-image, and all sorts of other things. Then, add on that men and women of our generation seem to deeply resent and hate each other. And yes, the culture of social media and the destructive cancer that is pornography aren't helping things either.

I only mention those things (and that is not an exhaustive picture by any means either) to set the context for what you might personally be dealing with.

With that being said, I'd say the main thing you can do is keep a mind for marriage. Don't let a prospective suitor waste your time, or his own for that matter. Yeah, one guy on this thread has already said that would scare him away, but your intentions should be clear, especially when you're in your mid and late 30s and there are big things you want in life. So yes, in a way, it should scare off a man who's not worth your time. Or it should cause him to evaluate if you are the woman he wants to pursue.

There's more that I could say, but I don't want to list off a whole bunch of other things that you've already done or considered.

[BCRanger10]

Thank you for MHO.

[BigDog1989]

She's obviously biased towards you, because she "likes you"

[Asker]

@BigDog1989 No lol, I actually thought his answer was helpful. Lol. That IS a thing you know.

[BigDog1989]

HAHAHAHHA

[BigDog1989]

I don't want either

The only way you could convince me to marry is if you aren't expecting it, meaning, don't go into the relationship thinking "i want marriage". You'll scare me off that way.

The only way to convince me to have kids, is to convince me to marry. The two go hand in hand. Right "christians", be married, to "have kids",

RIGHT FUCKERS?

[Asker]

Dude how the hell did you get MHO? ? ! Ugh..

[BigDog1989]

Because I deserved it?

[Asker]

If I had it my way, I probably would have picked a different answer but hey at least you are honest about it so yeah. But I do feel like a lot of the answers the bot picks were just because it's a popular answer or a lot of trolls picked it or the bot's choice was just ridiculous. I wish they totally got rid of the bot choices completely as it is NOT for the "bots" to decide what is most helpful for me really!

[BigDog1989]

Again, biased, answer, of course, by the QA. If you don't like the answers, don't ask the questions, GET OVER IT, SNOWFLAKE

[Asker]

There are LOTS of biased answers here if you didn't realize. Most of the time when someone asks a question on here, they usually pick the ones they like best, or the ones they agreed with. They have that right for THEIR question!

Also, I don't think it's nice of you to tell me to "get over it". Why don't you get over yourself!

[BigDog1989]

The ones you wanted, ARE BIASED

[Anonymous]

I'mma post anonymous cause i dont wanna come out as harsh but if you are closing up 40 and still not getting married the chances of you having kids at this age is super low and even so the risk of complications are so high its not worth it.

Men and women want different things so if you can't give him children then maybe adoption. And at your age you would most likely have to lower your standards. So my best tip is to join a Church and start talking to men there. Show them your wife qualities and do not have sex until there is a ring on your finger

[Asker]

Well, my aunt had twins, a boy and a girl, in 2012 at the age of 49 so, it's still possible, but you're probably right. However, I didn't just want to have a baby with ANYONE! Especially anyone who would scape on those responsibilities and/or with an asshole.

So you're saying I am looking for a needle in a haystack.

Not like the cost of living is cheap either. Have you see the cost of food, shelter and other basic needs?

Also, men need to grow up more in my opinion.

Finally, maybe I am thinking it is just dumb luck.

[Opinion Owner]

yeah see you are feminist you have been lied too to think your career gives you value, it doesn't. At all. Men dont want the same as women and as long as you have teh "i hate men attitude" no man will wanna be with you. You need to become more feminine, submissive and caring.

Your sister had a kid at 49.. does that kid have any issues?

[Asker]

1. it's my aunt who did, not my sister. I don't have any sisters.
2. I don't think so. The children look adorable and normal so far.
3. Not opposed to adoption or surrogation by the way. But yeah, like I asked, did you WANT me to just have it with anyone? ! I didn't think so.

[Opinion Owner]

No thats not what im saying but if you want a man to see you as a wife you need to act like one and stop with the male hate

[Asker]

Um, I never indicated that I hated the opposite sex?

[Opinion Owner]

Yes but you have an attitude against them and even me now loll..

You said "men need to grow up". I've already said what you need to do you can choose to listen and change or keep complaining.

I wish you best of luck! May God bless you!

Bye!:)

[Asker]

No, I don't think you understand. You are coming at me with a defensive tone that I don't really appreciate. You are misunderstanding what I am saying. Just admit it, there are A LOT (and I mean a lot) of men that still need to grow up. I've personally experienced being with men like this so thank God I am not with those people and am now with somebody that treats me right and we are compatible in a lot of ways.. I am not complaining. I had just been wondering about it for a while that's all. Not really complaining, just asking what is the difference between them and me. And no, I am not WILLING to slut myself up, or twerk or be a hag with a big butt and boobs just to get a man to "commit" and have children with me. No thanks!

[Girl242]

The blind leading the blind.

[Asker]

Dude seriously also how did YOU get MHO! Ugh..

[Anonymous]

i'm only answering because i'm so sick of people saying "once you're over age 35 you can't have children!" it's ridiculous. i've seen women give birth in their 40's. it's not impossible and it's okay! we need to stop these stereotypes. any woman has risks, even at age 25... this "need to have kids at a certain age" came from when the average life span was much much lower. so stop.

anyways. it's very hard to date nowadays but i wouldn't say it's over for you. keep trying!

[Asker]

Thank you.

[artgorgeous]

Be loving and caring, and make sure he does likewise. It's the only way.

[Asker]

❤ Thank you. That's definitely no problem for me to do and I hope my fiance appreciates what I've done for him so far!

[iseekpinetrees]

You just have to find a man who wants marriage and children at some point. But if by 40 u have no kids I dont suggest having them. The risk for autism fores up dramatically and having a kid with some messed up disability.

[Asker]

Well how about others who have had them at that age or older? Are you calling them selfish? I think people who have children at ANY age are selfish. However, it's a natural want/desire for a lot of people to spread their genes. Plain and simple. However, like I said to the other commenter, I wasn't just going to have a kid with just anyone. That would be a trapping exsistence in a way.

Actually, did you know that Kim Kardashian is pregnant now with her fourth child? Only in this hell hole we call Earth do people who are ugly and or undeserving get children... or maybe people smart enough to reproduce at ANY cost , including those who just try to trap men with those things! Even having them with jail immates and dead beat losers!

[Asker]

Also, autism, shizophrenia, can be a risk with older fathers/older sperm too did you know.

[iseekpinetrees]

If your so offended by the comments on here why dont you go to your obgyn and talk to them and have some tests done so you'll know if your able to have children and the risks involved.

[Nikki1989]

You have to find the right men, but good luck with that, there are not many out there.

[Anonymous]

Find a time machine.😆