Have you ever been criticized for being too well-spoken?

[Flower7]

I have this problem all the time. People make a big deal about the way that I talk and say I must not be from here. I live in the South in the US. Many people here have country accents and are very proud of that.

They talk down to me because I don't sound like them. They say I sound too "proper". I don't use a whole lot of slang and people seem to think that's strange.

It's gotten so bad that I've even been considering moving away to a different part of the country to not have to deal with that anymore.

Has anything like this ever happened to any of you?

[bulletbob555]

I get that a lot here in sc. See I have a very high vocabulary so sometimes I'm using big words when I'm explaining stuff. Its made worse by the fact I lived in N. Y. before moving here as well as living in Florida where they don't talk southern either. Its all good though. I also get asked that after stating a liberal idea. Peoplle in non southern places will think you talk southern so don't move.

[Flower7]

I'm in SC also. I'm from here but I moved around a lot because of having a parent in the military. So I doubt that I have any hint of southern accent at all, even from a northerner's point of view.

[Flower7]

I've never had any desire to sound that way so I never picked up the country way of speaking.

[bulletbob555]

Florence here. Yeah I still like living here the best although I love to go to Florida for a month here and there because there is so much more to do. Plus the weather during winter haven't been since a couple days before lockdown started. Got to get rid of this virus so people can get back to doing stuff

[Flower7]

I'm in Columbia. I'm glad to hear that people in Florida have no accent. That seems like it would be a nice place to live if I ever did decide to try going somewhere else.

[Flower7]

I'm from Sumter originally.

[bulletbob555]

Cool that all sounds pretty interesting.

[Mehzmeh]

I also talk like I, have some sense. And all my black friend's think it's weird. I told them I have a education. And I, am a professional. Can't sound like someone who grew up in the "hood". Lol

[Sonorous]

Yes, but only in middle school & in the form of a brief mockery.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

I have had people criticize me online for being "long winded" a lot. It's usually when we're having a discussion and I disagree with them and explain my side, and the typical response I get is "Whatever, I don't have time to read your long winded rant. There's no use in educating ignorant people like you", or something to that extent. Lol.

I've also been accused of trying to use "fancy words", even though I was just speaking like I usually do.

[Flower7]

I've noticed that people sometimes get a bit intimidated when asked to read something.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

Yes, a lot of people say "I'm not reading all of that" or "TL;DR". A lot of people have very short attention spans, too.

I think with a lot of these people, when I explain my side of things and they get flustered that it makes sense and don't want to feel as if I may be right, get very defensive and just try to make up an excuse. I try to be civil about it, too, but sometimes people get really peeved when you bring up something they don't want to hear, I guess. I found this to be especially true when I was involved in the horse world and people were very, very set in their ways.

[Flower7]

What's the horse world?

[aWes0MeNeSs]

The horse industry/the community of equestrians and people involved with horses in some way or another. I used to own, ride, and show horses.

[Flower7]

Oh I see! Thanks for explaining that.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

No problem!

[AmandaYVR]

They're trying to demean you because you sound more educated and worldly and classy than them.
Ignore them.
I'm not surprised you're considering moving away. I am very familiar with some of the attitudes down there.
Don't be afraid to be better. There is no shame in that. None.

[Flower7]

Thanks so much! That's very encouraging. And yes, down here, it's almost like ignorance is something that's praised and celebrated.

[AmandaYVR]

Yes, exactly. I have two family members down there who feel the same thing. They often will curtail their true opinions, just to keep the peace with the neighbours and friends. But there is some very backwards, archaic thinking there.

[JustRollTheDice]

Yep going to university I'd only ever been in private schools and my dad immigrated from England so I have a posh accent compared to others, but just be a duck on water and let it glide off, as well as just embrace it you are who you are

[Flower7]

Just a few days ago, someone asked me if I had gone to private school because of how I talk.

[JustRollTheDice]

You get over it. And use it to your advantage

[WhiteSteve]

I get more remarks about my accent, lmao. And not even that so much anymore because I moved back to the area I grew up in, so a lot of people talk like me. So now I got nothin’, lmfao. Nah, but some people think I articulate myself well and am very well-mannered, it’s just pretty heavily accented so you wouldn’t really call it “well-spoken.”

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Yes, a lot of people think I wasn't born in America cause my writing doesn't seem like someone from America and some say about my accent sounds like many nationalities all combined into one wow people have no life is how I see it?

[Flower7]

You're right about that! It definitely seems like these people have no life. They seem to be very narrow-minded.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

@Flower7 Yes Flower, I just let them go and ignore them cause I feel no use in me getting upset over nothing... I had a problem with doubling spacing when I would type on the Computer well I corrected my problem but it hurt me that I was being criticized

[Avicenna]

I've had some people make fun of some of the way I express myself in German, but it wasn't really criticism. I have, however, been criticized for being too charming!

[Flower7]

Too charming... really? This is my 1st time hearing about someone being criticized for that. People will complain about anything!

[Avicenna]

No kidding. I thought it was a joke at first!

[magiusX26]

i too am from the south. because i only have a lite accent from that many people think am from the north, often get asked either new york (not the joey from friends type) or boston. mostly from actually annuncuating words.

[Flower7]

Does it bother you when that happens? Or does it make you feel like you don't belong here?

[magiusX26]

it has had a twinge of that before. used to sell stuff to the public and had to speak to people all the time, thats where it happened the most (99%). over 7 years had comments on it at least 100 times.

[Flower7]

Have you ever considered telling people what they want to hear and saying that yes, you're from up north? Sometimes I think about doing that.

[magiusX26]

only as a joke

[DizzyDesii]

I've had northerners try to mock me and say i should talk like a hick instead of proper. Then the southerners say i sound too proper for them. Then the black people say i sound too white. And the white people say i dont sound black enough 🤷‍♀️

[blondfrog]

That's another way of them admitting they feel inferior to you. It's a verbal submission.

[Flower7]

Could be! Maybe they feel inferior because they have trouble speaking English well. It's always strange to me how so many people can have trouble speaking their own native language.

[blondfrog]

When people find out English is my second language they act shocked and sadly some get jealous of how well spoken and literate I am. It's like instead of getting jealous why don't you work on yourself? lol

[Jjpayne]

I've been criticized for being too poorly spoken by my roommate all the time 😂😂😂😂

Either you are too well spoken or too poorly spoken... I'm telling you, you can't win!!! 🙃

[Giggltr0n]

Yeah, I have had people assume that I was trying to act "too smart" because of how I speak and the words I choose to use.

[Sonorous]

😂 That's always such a bittersweet thing to hear. Sad because they're putting a limit on knowledge and funny because they're putting a limit on knowledge.

[GreenGold1992]

No, but I'm sorry to hear that, not very fair for you.

[Flower7]

Thanks. It does feel very unfair.

[GreenGold1992]

That's because it IS very unfair

[venomhbk1313]

No but I've been criticized for being outspoken quite a bit

[Flower7]

I tend to say too much also.

[venomhbk1313]

You and I are one of a kind

[Flower7]

It gets me in trouble a lot though lol. I'm very opinionated.

[COMMODOREII]

Nope not really. But when i lived in North Carolina i was told i spoke too quickly. I guess growing up in a larger city has made me communicate faster. 😎

[nodnol32]

I haven't been both criticised and complimented for it. Doesn't bother me.

[nodnol32]

Have*

[Jamie05rhs]

Yes, actually. I have definitely experienced this many times.

[Paris13]

My Diction is perfect. xx

[Flower7]

Same here.

[Paris13]

@Flower7 It is Surprise and Sad ho some People do NOT "Understand" us? xx

[Flower7]

Yes it's very sad when people seem to struggle with their own native language!

[Paris13]

Or being Ass Stubborn. xx

[bklynbadboy1]

Yes and I hate it when they say your speak well like should sound some other way

[Tstrbrainer]

Nope, that's strange. Never happened to me before.
Does this people have lots of time?

[stuntbrain]

Haven't experienced this. The closest I've come is being accused of using "big words" to sound "smart"

[magiusX26]

that is roughly what OP was saying.

[stuntbrain]

Is that so? Hmmm... it seems to me the specific issue is how she talks (as described by geographic region) and not so much of what she says

[stuntbrain]

Even the reference to "slang" is based upon location

[douride2]

No I have just the opposite problem.

[pizzalovershouse]

No just my texting wrong spelling of words

[KrakenAttackin]

The problem is theirs, not yours.

[shortster]

Complimented; but not criticized.