I feel like im losing myself, I don't know who I am, what I actually feel, it feels influenced by others. How to understand your true self?

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Understanding yourself isn't hard. Being affected by others can be.
Especially if you're kind of a people pleaser. I was probably like this for the first 40 years. of my life. You have to develop a boundary line. You might have this problem, I don't know, I don't know you.
Basically first of all I have high expectations of friends. That's why I have only a handful of friends. Most people don't make the cut. Those people I would go to the ends of the earth for. Because I know they would with me. My family is paramount with me (I know this isn't everyone) but I'm very tight with my family. And everyone else I know is just an acquaintance. I'm polite with them, because that's just who I am. But I draw a line with them VERY quickly. Because and acquaintance to me is just a slight step up from a stranger. They might think we're friends, because I'm cordial. But if they try to use my friendship in ANY way. They find out right then and there we're just acquaintances. And I'm totally fine with whatever reaction the give. Because I don't mind losing acquaintances. I meet new people everyday.
Life is about knowing who to invest in and who not to. And people who influence you over time will help shape you both good and bad. That's why it's important to surround yourself with the right people. Don't feel bad! As I said it took me till about 40 to fully understand who I was.

[Asker]

Wow, most important you have done what was right for u in the end. By that i mean finding yourself

[Anonymous]

You're not alone, so don't feel like you are alone with this.

By recognizing what you just said, you're already showing that you're aware of being influenced by others which we all are, and losing yourself means you feel yourself, so you're not lost.

Are you single? Those are the type of thoughts I get when I'm lonely.

[Asker]

Im not but it's complicated situation so i understand that im in this mindset

[Opinion Owner]

You have a set of needs as does every human, that's part of who you are.

[ShadowMonarch]

Ask your self again and again about who should I be...
What could i become

[Asker]

I do and each time I don't know what to reply

[ShadowMonarch]

Go out see the world... find what interests you...

Or Watch Jordan Peterson motivational videos

[ShadowMonarch]

I was also in a situation similer to this... but once I saw a video of his I was very intrigued and wanted to become like him... so I made a list... a list of goals... long term ones and short term ones... and these days I utilize my time in the best way I can