Would you say my combination is rare?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend thinks I'm a rare gem that's been hidden. Is my combination rare?

- Non-religious latina (agnostic leading towards atheism)
- Childless in my 30's but yes we do want one child at least
- He's my 2nd boyfriend (my 1st relationship was terrible) but we haven't done it yet. I'm low count.
- I've never done cohabitation. It's either dating separately or only live together if engaged or married.
- Not a hot-tempered. I rarely get upset unless it's serious or you really wrong me badly.
- I don't believe in spanking kids. Hitting solves nothing. I find it lazy parenting.
- I love cooking and martial arts equally. Both are my passion and hobbies.
- I'm partially Westernized but hold some traditional values; 50/50

Yes

No

Updates

+1 y

If you get me very enraged (ex: you're a lying cheater), I'm not wasting my time fighting you nor the other woman. You're her problem now. I'll just block you forever, get you out of my life.

[fonduegirl]

Let's see- Non-religious latina (agnostic leading towards atheism) Agnostic just means you don't believe in idol worship and waiting for some miracle to prove the existence of God. You ain't no atheist, sis.- Childless in my 30's but yes we do want one child at leastEveryone does want one child to continue their bloodline or whatever. It's just wise of you to have waited this long.- He's my 2nd boyfriend (my 1st relationship was terrible) but we haven't done it yet. I'm low count. Taking things slow is the way to go. - I've never done cohabitation. It's either dating separately or only live together if engaged or married. It's okay. You just may not be comfortable. A lot of people I know would say they aren't ready to move in with their partners. It's a big step, and sometimes a lousy one.- Not a hot-tempered. I rarely get upset unless it's serious or you really wrong me badly. So you're chill?- I don't believe in spanking kids. Hitting solves nothing. I find it lazy parenting. We'll see when you have one.- I love cooking and martial arts equally. Both are my passion and hobbies. Nice 👍🙂- I'm partially Westernized but hold some traditional values; 50/50That's good balance. But no, you ain't that rare.

[Asker]

I actually doubt the existence of a god but would change my mind if proven scientifically with real evidence and it would have to be known by everyone by then.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think you’re rare per say bc a lot of people has the same values and qualities as you, but you do have a lot of very positive qualities that make you a great and interesting person!

[Asker]

True. I've developed some westernized concepts due to the fact of being raised in the states for many years (I've been speaking English since I was 5/6 years ago and express myself better in that language than my native Spanish, lol) but have kept some traditional values such as not sleeping around, partying like crazy and not living together with a man that's not my fiance nor husband.

[Opinion Owner]

That’s awesome! I feel like with your background and upbringing, you’re able to offer something different to the table seeing as you’re like a combo of different cultures and values. Which is probably why your boyfriend thinks you’re unique.

I totally get where you’re coming from, my family also moved to the states when I was in middle school but I was raised back in Asia. So like you, I also adopt some of the more westernized cultures while still retaining a lot of my roots.

[MCheetah]

Yes, I'd say you're pretty rare and quite a gem. But honestly, I'd want to know which way you voted, cause most Latinas tend to be conservative in lifestyle but vote Democrat anyway (cause they think they have to).

I like all of your traits except the "not spanking kids" thing. That's how you end up with ungrateful, spoiled little sh*ts who appear on Dr. Phil. Tough love is needed to discipline kids, especially in today's day and age, or else you end up with little pussies who grow up to be Ezra Miller or Amber Heard.

Anyway, I think I know who you are, given the age and sounding Puerto Rican. You have big boobs that you show off, correct? And you're short too, right? And you love boudoir masks? Or maybe not.

[Asker]

You got the nationality and height wrong. I'm 5'7 and not Puerto Rican.
I believe you can still discipline without the need to spank a child. I wouldn't want my child to fear me. Feeling guilty for lying and it eating you up is better than feeling bad about it just because your parents are going to spank you.

[Asker]

The later doesn't tell me anything. If they're avoiding doing the wrong thing just because mom and dad will spank them doesn't tell me why it's wrong. That's only avoiding trouble but not actually caring about doing the right thing out of your own free will.

[MCheetah]

I thought you were Meetkitty123, but she's not medium height; she's like 5'1".

And I think that believe on raising children is naïve. You can do everything right and outside influences will still turn them into little monsters who need discipline. Spanking them isn't "abusing" them and getting them to fear you; it's doing the right thing when they get out of line or decide to start breaking stuff just because it's fun. Trying to "talk things out" with a child will only result in them ignoring you because you're essentially saying you don't believe in punishment for bad behavior. I mean, good luck with that and all.

[Asker]

I believe in natural punishments. For instance if a kid plays video games all day and fails to do his homework then they can't complain if they fail their exam or get bad grades in the class. Similary, a child backtalking will simply not have their privileges taken away and will miss out on fun activities. Instead of a fun day, they will end up with a boring day of doing chore, read a book or something else and not go out with their friends.

[Asker]

I don't just think about lecturing them for endless minutes but being creative too. The punishment I liked (I heard of it before) was about a girl being forced to wear the same clothes for bullying someone or a father coming to his daughter's class dressed as a clown after he found out she's been skipping school. Now that's creativity.

[MCheetah]

That doesn't matter to a kid because they can't see the consequences for their actions. Do you think they'll care about that? Ooh, you took away their phone and gave them a timeout. They'll just use their friends phones, or the school's internet, and ignore your time out and do what they want because they can. Furthermore, that's not taking an active role in their lives and essentially saying "let nature figure it out." It's telling them you don't care what they do.

I'm not a parent, but I am a teacher, and I know what evil little sh*ts act like. You can't "reason" with them, like you think you can. Similar to women, if a child thinks you're weak or they sense in you, they WILL test it out and do everything in their power to push the boundaries. A parent is supposed to be an authority figure in addition to a guardian. If they think you're weak because you're too soft to discipline them, then they won't respect you or listen to you. That's how you get Dr. Phil Kids. I mean, we've had over two decades now of proof to see that this weak passive "please just be good Jimmy" parenting DOES NOT WORK. I mean, you can do what you want and all, but it sounds like you're just going to have a spoiled little monster on your hands before they even turn ten.

[MCheetah]

Also, you got that punishment from a Dhar Mann video. The girl had s rch mom and the mom made her daughter "dress like a poor person." That sh*t is terrible! Don't EVER listen to a damn Dhar Mann video!

That also wouldn't work on a bad child; if anything, it'd make them even worse. I still can't believe you referenced a damn Dhar Mann video in regards to parenting.

[Asker]

I still think there are several more ways to get your points across without corporal punishment. If it takes time to get a good reasult (without spanking), I have all the patience in the world.

''Similar to women, if a child thinks you're weak or they sense in you, they WILL test it out and do everything in their power to push the boundaries.''

Why is a woman similar to a child? I thought that in a relationship or marriage, we were an equal partner where none has more power than the other.

[MCheetah]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3wxlTcPX_k&t=

[MCheetah]

"If it takes time to get a good result (without spanking), I have all the patience in the world."

Like I said, parents have been trying to hippie treatment for 25 years now and all it's given us is a generation of vapid narcissists and girls signing up for OnlyFans on their 18th birthday. There are probably other ways to discipline children besides bullying, but if you know the magical secret to raising perfect little children, then let me know, so I can write a book and make a billion dollars off it.

A woman won't respect a man she thinks is weak. Children are the same way regarding adults.

[MCheetah]

(I'm doing two things at once; ignore the typos from before.)

"If it takes time to get a good result (without spanking), I have all the patience in the world."

Like I said, parents have been trying the hippie treatment for 25 years now and all it's given us is a generation of vapid narcissists and girls signing up for OnlyFans on their 18th birthday. There are probably other ways to discipline children besides spanking them if you don't want them to become bullies and little monsters, but if you know the magical secret to raising perfect little children, then let me know, so I can write a book and make a billion dollars off it.

A woman won't respect a man she thinks is weak. Children are the same way regarding adults.

[MCheetah]

Also, I doubt you'd be fine with an "equal" man, who is smaller than you, weighs less than you, but equally as physically 'strong' as you. Or a man who makes far less money than you, but knows how to manage it better. Women always say they want "an equal partner" but then always choose taller, stronger, more dominant, assertive, successful men. Unless you're queer, I seriously doubt you want a man who is effeminate, dainty, and a coward during stress (women are socially allowed to be fearful and cowardly in danger; men are not).

[Asker]

Even though I've seen all types of videos (Life Lesson with Luis, Dhar Mann, DramatizedMe, etc), that's not where I got that idea. It was on this real life creative punishment from 9 years ago:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBhsg2ZaVU0

[Asker]

Now that you've mentioned narcissism, my first boyfriend was from Nicaragua. When he was a kid, his mother used to spanked him with a stick for misbehaving.
He turned out to be one of the worst narcissist and god fanatic ever. His famous phrase used to be ''You're never find anyone as great as me'' and ''I'm almost perfect''. That's the man I never want to see nor hear from ever again. So tell me how come he got spanked and it failed to develop a good person? Why did it still made a naricissistic-sociopath?

[Asker]

By equal partner, I don't literally mean the same exact size or totally exactly like me. You're taking equality too literally. I mean having the same rights to voice your opinion, both of you being assertive and coming to an agreement without turning it into an overheated argument.

[MCheetah]

Him being spanked or not has nothing to do with him being a narcissist. At least he wasn't a criminal or violent, right? So it probably helped there.

"By equal partner, I don't literally mean the same exact size"

Right. So you DONT want an "equal" relationship! You still want to be catered to by the man, and provided for, like a queen. But with equal power to him, despite him doing all the work and hard stuff. Got it! 😂

Well, I don't think you're very traditional/conservative. I think you're very liberal/left-leaning. But that's fine. More like 75-25, if I had to guess. But that's just my assessment. I personally don't like those traits in a woman (because it's usually nothing but double standards) and I no longer think I trust your own self-assessment of who you are. But since you know me better than I know you, I guess we'll have to "take your word on it" to some small extent.

[Asker]

If I wanted to I can sue him for the money he still owes me. He lied about wanting marriage and kids. Plus he lied about his real age. All his family are already US citizens except him. He's the only resident. I spoke with his mother once and she's was worried that he's not working on getting his citizenship and won't pay her money back. He's scammed his own mother too. He can't get his citizenship because he was a false date of birth on his application. If that's not criminal then I don't know what it is. Sounds like government fraud right there and therefore a crime.
By the way not all narcissists or sociopaths have to necessarily be violent criminals. You can be all that without committing a crime and that doesn't mean you're a well raised person. You're rotten to the core.

[Asker]

We can get my ex boyfriend in trouble if we wanted to but with those people, we're scared they might do something else against us so I decided to just block him forever from my life.

Did you read my last trait on my description? I never said I was a fully traditional woman. I said I had both westernized concepts (I've been speaking English since I was 5/6 years old and obviously raised in an English speaking country so it makes sense I would speak like this) but also some traditional values base on how I was raised at home. I'm 50/50.

[MCheetah]

Yeah, I read it. You just don't come off 50-50, at all. You come off really Liberal. Including wanting to sue a man because he wasn't honest with you. So not just Liberal, but VERY Californian. That's why I don't trust you to be a good judge of your own character. Just like women who say "I'm the sweetest person you'll ever meet." They're usually narcissists too.

[Asker]

So lying about working on his citizenship papers while still lying to me about his real age for years, using me for pleasure and money, draining a lot of my fertile years, committing government fraud is ''just someone not being honest?
Place yourself on my shoes. If a woman used you like that, lied about her real age and committed government fraud on her docs wouldn't you want to sue her too? You wouldn't get upset too?
The fact that I'm not going to proceed with it and decided to simply block him permanently means he got it off easily.

[Asker]

If standing up to myself for a valid reason means sounding too liberal to you, then we would be a dismatch.
No one deserves getting string along, getting used as a commodity and getting scammed. You would not like it either.

[MCheetah]

"So lying about working on his citizenship papers while still lying to me about his real age for years, using me for pleasure and money, draining a lot of my fertile years, committing government fraud is ''just someone not being honest?"

Women do that ALL THE TIME to men, and nobody bats an eyebrow. Hell, in court, the judge usually defends the WOMEN whenever this goes down.

I'm not defending the guy. You just got played and shouldn't have trusted him. You can't sue him for being a jerk, let alone YOU choosing to be with him and putting up with it. Where's your accountability in any of this?

Yup. Definitely Liberal.

[Asker]

I take responsibility for letting him waste my years. I do agree that it should've ended a lot sooner and my mother was right the whole time. In that part, well yes you are right on that.

As for what he did, I wouldn't blame you if you or any other man that wanted to sue a woman that did the same thing my ex boyfriend did. There is no bias when it comes to fairness. If courts are still favoring women more then the men should be bringing evidence to support their claim and continue fighting the case.

[Anonymous]

the love of my life is the exact same thing as you

[GingerGuy]

You sound much like me lol. That's probably what he means by it, that finding someone with all the qualities he likes and wants, that is rare, with everyone. It's hard finding someone you're compatible with. And even just your first 2 things are pretty rare to find together in a woman (non-religious and no children).

[JohnK123]

No not rare at all Ik people like u… and ya don’t spank kids lmao

[Dormiensmortem]

Probably? Everyone is unique, in some way or another, in their combination of personality traits.

[Fuentes]

Well i would have considered you rare until you said 30's.

[Karate_Guy]

Which martial arts do you do?

[Asker]

I'm doing Judo

[Karate_Guy]

Cool! Is Judo all throws and grappling? Or do you punch and kick too?

[Asker]

Yes we focus on throws and grapplings but our Sensei is diverse in martial arts and he likes teaching other things to us too. So yes, on certain days we also do punching and kicks.

[Karate_Guy]

Awesome!

[RuthlessAggression]

Just proves guys and girls can't be "just friends"

[Asker]

Can you explain how this relates to my post.

[RuthlessAggression]

your status update

[Anonymous]

You sound very well adjusted to me.

[driven159]

he is a lucky man